Epic win for a three year old little boy who narrowly misses being lost to adoption!

[bravenak]

51. I agree with you totally.

My grandmother was adopted and was never told who her real mother was. Her adopted mother called her up one day in the fifties and told her to come home so she could let her know before she died. By the time she got there she was dead and her sons had burned her papers to prevent my grapndmother from getting any money. MONEY? She wanted her roots, not the fucking money. They burned her history over money. She always assumed she was stolen to replace the womans own daughter who died. She was given the girls name and social and age. Seven years older than her. She married at 12 to a 40 year old man. Ten children two husbands ( i'm from the second line- irish/cherokee/black, i'm lucky, i can find my peeps in cherokee registries) she never wanted to be alone again, and she never was.
She died being considered an illegal immigrant by the US government because of shady adoption practises and a lack of paperwork even though she was OBVIOUSLY a decendant of slaves. Her husband was an illegal immigrant from spain. He was deported and she was allowed to stay because they could not figure out how to deport her or where to ship her to.
We need to know where we come from. Not knowing the history of the family eats me up inside and it happened two generations ago.
I'm glad that the child will not have to suffer feeling that void like something you never knew you had is missing.

If i adopted a child and the parent let me know a few months later that they had been decieved by the other parent i would check them out to make sure they were on the up and up and then i would return their child to them. If the parent were unwilling to part with their child, and had been defrauded, who am i to keep their child from them? I would feel horrible for them being decieved like that and would ask to be allowed to participate in some way as an honorary fmily member.
We do not do adoption ( we share children if the parents can't manage to keep them in the family, even rape babies that we decide to keep, like my sister who i love and my mother loves- no child is trash or an object of disgust to us. Innocent is what they are.) in my family because of my grandmother and the pain she felt. It affected every aspect of her life and led to alcoholism and self abuse and misery. Not to mention the feeling of not being wanted and having no self esteem and feeling alone in a crowd.

Just because the adoptive parents bonded with the child does not imo entitle them to anything. It certainly does not entitle them to rights that trump the rights of the natural parent who did not give them permission to his rights. Not to mention the rights of a child to knowledge of their family.

Sorry for rambling. I'm sure adoption works well for some. I just haven't seen many adoptees who are happy about it.