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jmowreader

(53,201 posts)
50. Noah, you don't understand
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 02:16 PM
Apr 2014

For one thing, God put all the apex predators in a state of suspended animation. Otherwise the world would probably be inhabited by tigers, not dinos.

Since he chose baby dinos, they fit on the Ark fine. The Bible wisely leaves out Noah's sons Larry, Curly, Moe and Shemp who were all eaten collecting the male tyrannosaur baby, and his sons Groucho, Harpo, Chico, Zeppo and Karl who were all eaten collecting the female. It turns out only God was allowed to wipe out whole families.

For some reason it also leaves out the part about being able to build a wooden ship that big with only hand tools without anyone noticing.

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I see dinosaurs walking around here all the time! RKP5637 Apr 2014 #1
actually, there are some in my backyard right now eShirl Apr 2014 #10
I share my home with two of them nadinbrzezinski Apr 2014 #44
LOL! My kitty loved looking outdoors, but he wanted no part of it than to look. n/t RKP5637 Apr 2014 #51
Nah, they took the eggs intaglio Apr 2014 #2
Sounds like a Flintstone's episode.... Segami Apr 2014 #5
" Oh Crap, Was That Today?"... Segami Apr 2014 #7
heh! eShirl Apr 2014 #11
In Florida, those are skinks. Eleanors38 Apr 2014 #53
Precisely malaise Apr 2014 #30
I've had a creationist actually say that to me. JoePhilly Apr 2014 #16
These are the people voting for Republicans randys1 Apr 2014 #3
Pretty pitiful darkangel218 Apr 2014 #4
Gees. It's a wonder he can function in society with that logic. The Wielding Truth Apr 2014 #6
Now they've got us arguing whether dinosaurs were on Noah's Ark... PCIntern Apr 2014 #8
Well it did exist nadinbrzezinski Apr 2014 #47
Ah, the fetid regressive meanderings of the Skidmore Apr 2014 #9
Next question - Do you BELIEVE that leprechauns on unicorns rounded them up? underpants Apr 2014 #12
Actually it was the fairies that did the rounding up, the leprechauns were busy hiding their gold. Bandit Apr 2014 #14
i almost choked on some yogurt! frylock Apr 2014 #37
He must mean birds. Birds are most of what's left of dinosaurs. onehandle Apr 2014 #13
You couldn't fit a single pair of baby animals from 1/10th of the genera of land mammals... MohRokTah Apr 2014 #15
What did the obligate carnivores eat? Erich Bloodaxe BSN Apr 2014 #28
They ate straw because MAGIC! eom MohRokTah Apr 2014 #29
Purina Dinosaur Chow frylock Apr 2014 #38
This is almost as good as the occasional explosion of ignorance from Orly Taitz. Lasher Apr 2014 #17
Yeah, and since Noah did not allow any one else in other than his family in there... Xyzse Apr 2014 #18
I asked tazkcmo Apr 2014 #36
that was a whole lot of begettin' it on frylock Apr 2014 #39
The RW Idiocy have no limits!!!!! mylye2222 Apr 2014 #19
The real trick was the kangaroos outrunning tigers to Australia when they landed jberryhill Apr 2014 #20
I think the thousands of bugs helped with the seeds to underpants Apr 2014 #21
There must have been hundreds of thousands of beetles on that boat Arugula Latte Apr 2014 #22
And Unicorns didn't make it in time TlalocW Apr 2014 #23
Nonsense! Everybody knows what made the dinosaurs go extinct. longship Apr 2014 #24
BWHAHAHAHAHA.. Segami Apr 2014 #32
Never take the young dinosaurs! wheniwasincongress Apr 2014 #25
Sorry dude…not a chance. Tikki Apr 2014 #26
So they ditched the line that god put fossils in the ground to test our faith? NightWatcher Apr 2014 #27
I still like that one best DefenseLawyer Apr 2014 #31
between that and the whole Job episode, god comes across as kind of a dick frylock Apr 2014 #40
reminds me of those guys who's into the 'two for flinching' game NightWatcher Apr 2014 #43
I'd go a bit further than "dick." I'd go with "mass-murdering psychopath." Arugula Latte Apr 2014 #46
+1000 Tom Ripley Apr 2014 #60
The whole no meat on Friday thing ended long ago jmowreader Apr 2014 #49
I'm sure it all makes sense in his repopulation fantasies Blue Owl Apr 2014 #33
For one thing dinosaurs would have eaten Noah and his family and all the other upaloopa Apr 2014 #34
Noah, you don't understand jmowreader Apr 2014 #50
K&R Feral Child Apr 2014 #35
Dumb nadinbrzezinski Apr 2014 #41
Just when you think performance art has run its course somebody comes up with something new. nt rrneck Apr 2014 #42
He's wrong. Dinosaurs went extinct because they were smokey nj Apr 2014 #45
Thank all the Gods LibertyLover Apr 2014 #48
Explains where the small brains PumpkinAle Apr 2014 #52
There is a documentary about Don MacLeroy... Blanks Apr 2014 #54
Definitely out where the buses don't run! SammyWinstonJack Apr 2014 #55
That makes sense! n/t zappaman Apr 2014 #56
I think that Noah didn't take the little ones. I think he took their eggs notadmblnd Apr 2014 #57
Seems legit Warren DeMontague Apr 2014 #58
So Noah had lemurs and wallabies and stingrays and bison and emus and tigers and reindeer and...etc. WinkyDink Apr 2014 #59
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