General Discussion

MrModerate

(9,753 posts)

16. Putting my Pollyanna hat on . . .

Sun May 25, 2014, 07:09 PM

May 2014

I have to ask the author: what kind of people (and specifically men) do you hang out with? Can you quantify how many of the too-many-men think like you describe?

Because I don't know any. I'm an older guy and my friends tend older as well, but I do know younger men and was one myself once, and the attitudes you describe are foreign to me.

Please don't get me wrong, but when the author of this piece says "Culture wants us to think that. That being a guy comes with a rider like we’re Van Halen demanding a fucking bowl full of green M&Ms or some shit . . ." that sounds like he's talking about the majority view.

It it helpful to terrorize ourselves? Do we make things better by painting them as worse?

Maybe I'm kicking a hornet's nest, but I'd like to know from both men and women:

• Men, do you recognize these traits? Are they predominant among your friends and acquaintances?
• Women, do you live in fear of all public places? Do you see every man as a potential assailant?

Because — without trying to downplay the problem — the author seems to be living on a different planet than I am.

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NOT ALL MEN, BUT STILL TOO MANY MEN [View all] Matariki May 2014 OP

++++++++ a billionzillionkajillion BlancheSplanchnik May 2014 #1

Recommended. H2O Man May 2014 #2

Come on jamzrockz May 2014 #3

The personal is political. Sheldon Cooper May 2014 #5

Oh you are the all women spokesperson? Egnever May 2014 #8

Good one! =) nt AverageJoe90 May 2014 #14

#YesAllWomen betsuni May 2014 #43

Are you the spokesman for MRAs? intaglio May 2014 #80

I dont understand jamzrockz May 2014 #9

The OP is just ridiculous.... Darkhawk32 May 2014 #11

The man who acted out his dark fantasy did so intaglio May 2014 #82

+1 nomorenomore08 May 2014 #85

Whatever gets you through the day. n/t Darkhawk32 May 2014 #94

Well at least I am not attempting to defend the sick fantasies of the MRA community intaglio May 2014 #95

I didn't say that. You're just as bad as them. n/t Darkhawk32 May 2014 #96

One person who goes on a murderous rampage is "STILL TOO MANY" Major Nikon May 2014 #10

^^^THIS^^^ Tom Ripley May 2014 #44

Everything is political jzola May 2014 #34

Can we not pull out the same tired old excuses for not talking about gun control and valerief May 2014 #102

K&R Scuba May 2014 #4

one entitled piss bag is too many. Whisp May 2014 #6

+1. nt bemildred May 2014 #7

women and the repugs kardonb May 2014 #12

I second that! smallcat88 May 2014 #15

I have wondered that - most of my life. The whole nauseating Woman-As-Property thing. calimary May 2014 #37

Sorry to hear smallcat88 May 2014 #42

The comment about "privilege" aside, this was a rather good, thoughtful article overall. AverageJoe90 May 2014 #13

Putting my Pollyanna hat on . . . MrModerate May 2014 #16

I don't fear men Abq_Sarah May 2014 #19

I've known few men with scary senses of sexual entitlement gollygee May 2014 #21

I'm not afraid of men - in public places or privately. Chemisse May 2014 #41

There are many places I avoid because of men and their attitudes of entitlement. bloom May 2014 #56

OK, I'm curious . . . MrModerate May 2014 #101

Sane men, rape and places to avoid bloom May 2014 #110

Putting on my "Use Google" hat I need only point you at the vile postings on loveshy intaglio May 2014 #84

Does a Twitter meme equal general acceptance? N/T MrModerate May 2014 #100

Look don't denigrate intaglio May 2014 #103

Sorry, I'm not understanding your comment. n/t MrModerate May 2014 #104

Funny that ... intaglio May 2014 #105

Asking the question is not denigration. MrModerate May 2014 #112

Has anyone alerted on this hateful thread? B Calm May 2014 #17

If this gets hidden gollygee May 2014 #18

+1 Starry Messenger May 2014 #20

+1000 Tom Ripley May 2014 #45

How is calling out entitled assholes "hateful" towards all men? I don't follow you... nomorenomore08 May 2014 #50

Care to define why it is "hateful" intaglio May 2014 #86

Post removed Post removed May 2014 #22

DU has truly become anti-male for the sake of being anti-male. n/t Darkhawk32 May 2014 #23

Anti-misogynist does not = anti-male gollygee May 2014 #24

Not according to the OP and not to a lot of women on this site. We're all lumped in together. Darkhawk32 May 2014 #26

But go ahead, focus on a sexually frustrated male and not the real issue... Darkhawk32 May 2014 #27

What do you see as the real issue? gollygee May 2014 #33

I would like to hear what you think the 'real issue' is. n/t bloom May 2014 #57

Every last person in society is misogynist to some degree. Gravitycollapse May 2014 #28

Hmm gollygee May 2014 #31

It doesn't necessarily need to be a conscious act or thought. Gravitycollapse May 2014 #35

For the fully literate, I'm pretty sure it does Major Nikon May 2014 #46

Cultural biases don't have to be consciously expressed to have an effect. nomorenomore08 May 2014 #49

There's only 3 words in the definition Major Nikon May 2014 #51

Okay, fair enough. Using "sexism" in place of "misogyny" is fine. n/t nomorenomore08 May 2014 #53

Sexism is a concept, not an action. Gravitycollapse May 2014 #55

Sexism is an action Major Nikon May 2014 #67

"Sexism is an action" - No, sexism is what inspires action and what is produced by action. Gravitycollapse May 2014 #87

"As for the articles you've posted, I don't agree with their assessment" Major Nikon May 2014 #91

... Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #58

All of those definitions require a conscience effort Major Nikon May 2014 #60

You probably mean "conscious" Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #61

I'm not grammar flaming, you are Major Nikon May 2014 #63

No, they really weren't. Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #64

So how exactly does one unconsciously ingrain prejudice against or have contempt for women? Major Nikon May 2014 #68

Culture causes unconscious prejudice, obviously. Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #69

You are really reaching here Major Nikon May 2014 #70

Are you telling me that a significant percentage of men don't think women are inferior? Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #71

Interesting how you articulated that question Major Nikon May 2014 #73

Do you not even know what you're saying? Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #74

I'm quite sure I know what I'm saying Major Nikon May 2014 #75

I see that you're a bit obtuse. Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #76

Perhaps you need to look it up Major Nikon May 2014 #77

I'm afraid I'm not the one doing that. Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #78

Regardless of what it means none of the definitions support the assertion Major Nikon May 2014 #79

Of course it can. Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #81

Nailed it, thank you. Ridiculous the lengths people go to in oreder to try and squash the bettyellen May 2014 #99

Message auto-removed Name removed May 2014 #29

rofl YoungDemCA May 2014 #62

Yeah, I usually don't like misogynist women. n/t Darkhawk32 May 2014 #65

They don't kill, but they have those attitudes treestar May 2014 #30

I think men are more likely to be assaulted, though treestar May 2014 #25

Check out www.bjs.gov probably. Erich Bloodaxe BSN May 2014 #36

page 7 treestar May 2014 #38

The NCVS doesn't survey prisoners Major Nikon May 2014 #52

They are more likely to be murdered, overall. About 3 times more IIRC. nomorenomore08 May 2014 #48

And what is the majority gender doing that murdering? intaglio May 2014 #88

Of course men commit most of the murders. I was just answering the other poster's question. nomorenomore08 May 2014 #90

Reminds me of the pro-life crowd. Erich Bloodaxe BSN May 2014 #32

This quote says it ALL: TygrBright May 2014 #39

The fact of the matter is, people of both genders can be abusive, degrading and downright hatefull, DrewFlorida May 2014 #40

Very well stated but probably not going to receive much consideration right now. n/t Darkhawk32 May 2014 #66

I shared stories of how my brother is treated for staying at home joeglow3 May 2014 #72

And which gender, by a huge majority, commits violent acts? intaglio May 2014 #89

You don't need to convince me of the problem of violence against women! DrewFlorida May 2014 #98

Post removed Post removed May 2014 #47

In a culture of individualism and violence TBF May 2014 #54

I wonder if the mansplainers know the OP is from the blog of Chuck Wendig. bloom May 2014 #59

They don't read anything -- the knee jerks, they type betsuni May 2014 #83

"...barking up the wrong trees when they think a feminist-monster is up there." nomorenomore08 May 2014 #92

It's sad actually bloom May 2014 #106

That's one way to look at it. Regardless, I didn't come away with the most positive feeling. n/t nomorenomore08 May 2014 #107

About the green M&M's... lame54 May 2014 #93

+1 pedantic, informative and actually interesting maggiesfarmer May 2014 #108

I was debating whether or not to post that but decided it would be derailing the conversation. MadrasT May 2014 #109

Hmm. I never knew that. deutsey May 2014 #111

And another thing: Brigid May 2014 #97