General Discussion

nolabear

(43,850 posts)

13. Perhaps. But you and I are both assuming. We just assume differently.

Sat Jun 7, 2014, 05:04 PM

Jun 2014

One of the most charming, sweet waiters I ever had called me "miha" and I was the envy of the table. He wasn't leering, he was polite and adorable.

I'm old and come from a culture of manners too. It's considered rude not to be appropriate to the circumstances. If I was in a black tie affair then Sir or Ma'am would be fine. If I was eating chicken tenders and a diet coke then "princessa" or "Darlin'", uttered in the right tone of voice, is just comfortable familiarity. I do think suspicion is sad if it's not warranted. But, as I said, the way things are said tells volumes.

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an open letter to my waiter from your "princessa" [View all] niyad Jun 2014 OP

No tip, and report him to the manager (nt) Nye Bevan Jun 2014 #1

Well that's sad. I'd have to see how the waiter was actually acting, but it's sad. nolabear Jun 2014 #2

I am old and come from a culture of manners REP Jun 2014 #8

Perhaps. But you and I are both assuming. We just assume differently. nolabear Jun 2014 #13

I was just at a place where the motto is, "We Choke Our Own Chickens" REP Jun 2014 #18

What you describe sounds creepy to this northerner. To each his own, I guess. nt pnwmom Jun 2014 #10

Midwesterner, and co-signed REP Jun 2014 #19

Another Midwesterner here. Brigid Jun 2014 #21

good post smackd Jun 2014 #22

Maybe she just wanted a burger, and didn't want to have to come up with nice ways to tell Squinch Jun 2014 #24

Yeah, I know. And she could have mentioned that. nolabear Jun 2014 #31

Or maybe she just wanted to share the experience because she knows it's a common one. Squinch Jun 2014 #32

She wrote about her feelings and her experience - an experience that will resonate with many women. redqueen Jun 2014 #38

Because it's her job to correct his behavior - or not fuss about rude treatment REP Jun 2014 #40

Well said Packerowner740 Jun 2014 #29

You Drink DIET COKE? ChairmanAgnostic Jun 2014 #3

Dear Meagan, enlightenment Jun 2014 #4

And how do you know that saying something won't result in an act of retribution pnwmom Jun 2014 #9

I don't live my life in fear, or enlightenment Jun 2014 #11

Well, that's nice for you. pnwmom Jun 2014 #14

Yes, it is nice, thank you. enlightenment Jun 2014 #16

You wait until the meal is done Packerowner740 Jun 2014 #30

You and me both. Say something, kindly, and take the power. nolabear Jun 2014 #15

Well said LeafsFan17 Jun 2014 #20

It works both ways 1000words Jun 2014 #5

Flirting wasn't the problem A Little Weird Jun 2014 #6

I agree. This guy's flirtation attempt was clumsy and inappropriate. 1000words Jun 2014 #7

Friendlys is alcohol-free, BTW. So it would have to be his own personal tequila supply. (nt) Nye Bevan Jun 2014 #12

I was not there. Brigid Jun 2014 #17

Being a man, and not having been there SomethingFishy Jun 2014 #23

To all those saying, "If she was so bothered, she should have just said something to make him stop!" Squinch Jun 2014 #25

Good gods. Erich Bloodaxe BSN Jun 2014 #26

There are some sickos out there. I saw it happen. Squinch Jun 2014 #27

And you did nothing about it? woolldog Jun 2014 #42

It comes down to simple math, based on years of experience. KitSileya Jun 2014 #33

Yes exactly. And the women here all seem to understand perfectly that the next step to Squinch Jun 2014 #34

exactly. the irritating thing with this thread is total obtuseness or gamesmanship. nt seabeyond Jun 2014 #37

Exactly, thank you - they are victim blaming and they are enabling this crap. redqueen Jun 2014 #39

I don't like guns but Packerowner740 Jun 2014 #28

When I was young betsuni Jun 2014 #35

Should have talked to his manager. davidthegnome Jun 2014 #36

Many men don�t see what women experience. G_j Jun 2014 #41