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NightWatcher

(39,377 posts)

15. I would sell the family my deadbeat removal services

Thu Jun 26, 2014, 08:53 PM

Jun 2014

Day One: Stop serving her food, but don't be obvious about it. Just have everyone else eat out all day.
Day Two: Have a big BBQ in the back yard and be ready to lock the door behind her when she came outside to get a rack of ribs off the grill. Lock her out and then turn on the sprinklers.

If that did not work, send the family to a hotel and launch Operation Fumigation. It involves turning off the AC and fan, Hell cut the power all together and bolt the windows shut. Lock every other door in the house so she'd have nowhere else to run to hide. Then start stinking her out with bowls of feces left outside her room. Then introduce dozens of cats and a boombox blasting Judas Priest music and Spice Girls 24 hours a day.

If that did not work, I'd hire some large strong dudes to pick her up out of her room and carry her to the street, gently of course, I'm no monster.

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Nanny refuses to work, won't move out after being fired, wants family out of house from 8am to 8pm [View all] Liberal_in_LA Jun 2014 OP

Let me get comfy here. JVS Jun 2014 #1

I had a housemate like that, once villager Jun 2014 #2

don't feed her. Stay in your house. Get someone to come in and assess her mind. roguevalley Jun 2014 #43

oh, this was finally resolved a year ago, and I've literally "moved on" since then villager Jun 2014 #68

very weird and sad story roguevalley Jun 2014 #71

Oh, much weirder than I've posted here... villager Jun 2014 #72

That is one of the weirdest stories I have ever read. n/t Jefferson23 Jun 2014 #3

Serve her a big wet dog turd on a delft plate. Ilsa Jun 2014 #4

Very strange, if they can't have her removed for trespassing, at least they could stop feeding her. tritsofme Jun 2014 #5

Yes, she would; she's established residency REP Jun 2014 #13

This family screwed themselves, didn't they? bluestateguy Jun 2014 #6

Poor people aren't automatically right kcr Jun 2014 #8

Formally fire her and have her arrested for trespassing. rocktivity Jun 2014 #7

Calif. law precludes involuntary psychiatric hold. truedelphi Jun 2014 #42

Hmm -- a West Coast Bartleby . . . Journeyman Jun 2014 #9

They have to start the eviction process - then the police can haul her ass out of there REP Jun 2014 #10

No eviction necessary -- she is neither a tenant nor a guest rocktivity Jun 2014 #18

not sure it's that simple , in California in most cases a person can't just be kicked out JI7 Jun 2014 #19

Doesn't work that way, alas. It's a civil matter; cops can't do shit until there's an order to evict REP Jun 2014 #20

But it's her workplace first and her home second. rocktivity Jun 2014 #24

It's a residence, not an office. They gave her a room of her own. REP Jun 2014 #25

Exactly, it would be like if an employer in a company fired an employee. Fla Dem Jun 2014 #60

You are licensed to practice law ... oldhippie Jun 2014 #92

Is there a Craigslist section for job postings like that? Nice work if you can get it. bluesbassman Jun 2014 #11

There is Renew Deal Jun 2014 #48

I meant ones for an old Bluesman to lay in bed all day and only come out for meals. bluesbassman Jun 2014 #69

You wouldn't come out and play some guitar? KittyWampus Jun 2014 #95

Well, maybe for some good barbecue and a cold beer. bluesbassman Jun 2014 #96

This will make a great movie malaise Jun 2014 #12

Have they settled on a script yet for Mrs Doubtfire II ? Gidney N Cloyd Jun 2014 #29

ROFL malaise Jun 2014 #32

It did make a great movie. christx30 Jun 2014 #35

That was my first thought as well: Carter Hayes! alcibiades_mystery Jun 2014 #55

Picture perfect for the Lifetime Channel bluestateguy Jun 2014 #37

And we wonder why all Lifetime advertises malaise Jun 2014 #46

That's what I was thinking. Renew Deal Jun 2014 #49

Pacific Heights comes to mind. Jamastiene Jun 2014 #53

They need to evict her and most importantly do not touch her or her belongings. dilby Jun 2014 #14

Yup. You are correct. REP Jun 2014 #23

I would sell the family my deadbeat removal services NightWatcher Jun 2014 #15

You had me laughing at Day Two!!!!! MADem Jun 2014 #28

Getting up off the floor malaise Jun 2014 #33

Day Two-BBQ! Cha Jun 2014 #45

Aren't the Spice Girls taking it a little too far? hack89 Jun 2014 #80

They should call the police and have them help evict her. About her threats to sue Louisiana1976 Jun 2014 #16

They did call the cops. Cops said it's a civil matter Liberal_in_LA Jun 2014 #17

Once they have an order to evict (30 days + 15 usually), cops will throw her out REP Jun 2014 #21

CA landlord/tenant law is on line; they can file themselves REP Jun 2014 #22

Unless they have gone through the eviction procedures csziggy Jun 2014 #65

Don't feed her! elleng Jun 2014 #26

I can't believe it took this long OriginalGeek Jun 2014 #27

I can't believe it, either Alex P Notkeaton Jun 2014 #31

This is what I was looking for before posting it myself! You beat me to it. nt ChisolmTrailDem Jun 2014 #41

Reminds me of that Drew Barrymore movie, Duplex. Baitball Blogger Jun 2014 #30

"I prefer not" - Bartleby Yo_Mama Jun 2014 #34

Oh right! treestar Jun 2014 #58

Why are they feeding her? HooptieWagon Jun 2014 #36

Exactly. Lock up all the food. LisaL Jun 2014 #40

Boot meet ass. greytdemocrat Jun 2014 #38

She has to come out of her room to pee, no? Phentex Jun 2014 #64

Then she could sue for assault A Little Weird Jun 2014 #70

how could she prove it? Phentex Jun 2014 #73

They should stop feeding her. nt geek tragedy Jun 2014 #39

Damn.. I guess they could not feed her. That would be mean but maybe she'd get her butt Cha Jun 2014 #44

Nanny would make a good Republican Congressman! B Calm Jun 2014 #47

lol Renew Deal Jun 2014 #50

And this is a good reason to always obtain avebury Jun 2014 #51

That's why I just can't care about these parents... Phentex Jun 2014 #59

Can they set up some live web cams? Maybe make some money bettyellen Jun 2014 #52

That is a great idea. Jamastiene Jun 2014 #54

The quote from the article that gave me pause was this one: christx30 Jun 2014 #56

Barnaby treestar Jun 2014 #57

Bartleby. The Velveteen Ocelot Jun 2014 #67

Yes! treestar Jun 2014 #87

36 lawsuit history. do a background check before you hire someone to live in your home. Sunlei Jun 2014 #61

Yep. I don't feel sorry for them at all. Phentex Jun 2014 #62

How kind of you! nt Logical Jun 2014 #78

They endangered their children... Phentex Jun 2014 #79

Another perfect DU member! Congrats! nt Logical Jun 2014 #81

thanks Phentex Jun 2014 #82

but she looks like such a nice older lady, LOL, I have the solution snooper2 Jun 2014 #63

This lady is lucky she's still alive, seriously steve2470 Jun 2014 #66

In all seriousness, this is another manifestation of mental illness and how it affects all around Lee-Lee Jun 2014 #74

It looks more like a form of grifting. Ilsa Jun 2014 #84

It is most certainly grifting. Her entire life from the sound of it. alphafemale Jun 2014 #88

These kinds of people go past grifting Lee-Lee Jun 2014 #97

Nah, she just a-squattin' & gobblin'. Knows the legal ropes. Eleanors38 Jun 2014 #93

Call the cops. Maybe they'll shoot her. hunter Jun 2014 #75

Things would become very uncomfortable for the nanny liberal N proud Jun 2014 #76

that's interesting gopiscrap Jun 2014 #77

They could always play Slim Whitman 24/7 at full volume Generic Brad Jun 2014 #83

Oh, Mr. Shef-field! KamaAina Jun 2014 #85

If she leaves the house she makes sure to leave some of her things there ripcord Jun 2014 #86

My brother had roughly this experience with a "girlfriend" Sen. Walter Sobchak Jun 2014 #89

Looks like she was homeless for 9 years. christx30 Jun 2014 #90

It's fifteen days for a notice of belief of abandonment to expire. LeftyMom Jun 2014 #91

That's not bad. christx30 Jun 2014 #94

Update rocktivity Jul 2014 #98