Ya Know... Over My Years Here... I've Had Several PM's And/Or Responses... Asking Me...

[bigtree]

58. I'm a man, and I understand that there is a point where I will never truly understand

. . . what it is to be a woman. I have to listen to women and find some acceptance of what I learn from them because I can't really know for certain how they really feel about all of the issues associated with being a woman without their council.

It's one thing to stand where you are and aspire to some characteristic of another race, but it's a much further road to understand what it's really like to live that from birth. There's going to be a point where you'll need to listen to that other person to truly understand what it feels like in their skin, if that's your goal. It's not enough to just aspire to be like them. It's never really been true that folks are unattractive, just different from the white majority and vulnerable to the cliquishness that labels those differences as unattractive.

With African Americans in this country, seeking acceptability in many situations often comes with a cost to self-esteem. True, the grass is greener . . . but, most folks want acceptance right where they stand.