General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: Man sends wife spreadsheet detailing the times she denied him sex for the last month [View all]BainsBane
(57,274 posts)and I know how they work. Her clitoris is not biologically different from my own.
I expect there are women who do climax in under 20 minutes, but we are talking here about time to undress, have foreplay, sex, and get dressed again, all in under 20 minutes. I seriously doubt there are many women who would climax in the ten minutes at most that in that scenario.
The fact she doesn't want to have sex clearly means she isn't enjoying sex with him. You can talk about hypothetical women all you want, but obviously this woman doesn't want to have sex with the guy. We have seen lots of reasons why. The question I have is why do you think she owes him sex? You seem not even remotely concerned about her fulfillment and continue to make excuses for why her wishes should not matter.
Men who are accomplished lovers find that women are more than eager to have sex with them. When I hear men complain their wives don't want to have sex with them, I conclude there is likely a good reason for it. Your complaint there is something "sexist" about that is ridiculous. It is not universal to all men. When I first saw this spreadsheet discussed, I saw a male member say he had never experienced such a situation in his relationships, including with his wife. He said he always wondered why men complained women didn't want to have sex, when he found the opposite to be true. He then disclosed that he didn't consider he hadn't have sex if he didn't "get his." He also found the 20 minute remark comical. The fact is men, like women, vary in their sexuality ability. Focusing on pleasing one's partner is far more likely to make one a better lover than focusing entirely on oneself, as this man with the spreadsheet makes clear is his concern. I find it not even slightly surprising his wife doesn't want to have sex with him. Moreoever, I expect that will continue to be the case in future relationships if he doesn't rethink his approach.