Give Me Your Tired, Your Poor... (graphic)

[freshwest]

1. BREAKING NEWS: Lady Liberty requests repatriation to France:

"Enough is enough," the iconic, French-born resident who arrived in New York Harbor on June 19, 1885 was quoted as saying.

"The Republican Party now dominates the United States and is against all liberty and equality, wanting to turn this country into what we fought the Revolution in France to end.

They now proclaim that critical thinking skills and principles of the Enlightenment, which inspired my adopted homeland for generations, will no longer be taught in any school or allowed a voice.

Now they are even mocking the words with which I greeted over 20 million desperate emigrants to America. I'm leaving as soon as I can pack up and go."

The Republican Party spokesperson Wash Rinse Repeat Priebus then responded to the announcement by saying the French were never our allies and that the GOP would renew their calls to rid the USA of French influences.

He singled out French fries, French onion soup, French champagne, French perfume and other socialist and 'unmanly' products to restore America to its former greatness.

He then proposed crowning Charles Koch as the First King of America, sending women home to be kept barefoot and pregnant, and the resumption of the global slave trade to end unemployment benefits to save the economy.

"When wages are at the correct level, we have been promised that capital will once again return to these shores," he said.

The reform plan was quickly seized upon by all major media sources and will be enacted next year, said Priebus, who will be employed as official court jester.

More at the link:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=journals&uid=265673