"50 Shades": A feminist/BDSM Guide to Why it's Skeevy as Hell

[Warpy]

14. It's badly written porn for women who have been married too long

usually to the first guy who asked them when they were too young to decide. They might be the most compatible couple in the universe, but everything goes through periods of staleness now and then and that's when they haul out "50 Shades" and start looking at the vegetable counter without culinary plans in mind.

BD/SM is just one of those things I really don't get, like religion and televised football. I do know otherwise reasonable human beings who get their freak on that way. As long as they don't insist I join the fun, we're cool. On all three.

I'm not in the demographic and would likely have treated this the same way I treated romance fiction: no matter how dull the shift was, it would get launched across the room by page 4, propelled on a barrage of foul language about the author's ancestry, anatomy, proclivities, and ultimate destination for having written formulaic crap at a fourth grade reading level.

I just hope the men who have read my other posts on this take my advice to heart: do NOT use this as a date movie. You will be lucky to get something spilled on you while your date hollers "Oh HELL no!" and stomps out of the theater. Unlucky and you will be stomped on first.

I find it amusing that the censorship fans want to protect women from seeing this thing. Most women have been through far worse, already, either personally or supporting friends and family. This movie will only shock men.