I was taking pictures of my daughters. A stranger thought I was exploiting them.

[MADem]

2. OK, I'm torn, here.

On the one hand, not having a photo of "Dad" to compare to the daughters, there's no way I can see if there is a resemblance at all (just because we are biracial doesn't mean we don't have the physical characteristics of BOTH parents, after all) that an astute observer of the scene might have sussed out if he'd bothered to take a good, "policeman's" look.

On edit--the kids were adopted, so they wouldn't "look like" Dad...but still, the HS guy could have hung around and listened to the girls interacting with the photographer ("Dad, how many more are you gonna TAKE?&quot . Even an accent shared by father and daughter suggests a familial--not an exploitative--relationship.

On the other hand, the exploitation of Asian girls has been in the news lately, with Pakistani girls being at the forefront in recent days, but they certainly aren't the only nationality that have been abused, molested and trafficked, often at very young ages. Thailand has been battling this problem for eons, mainly because they say they don't like it while taking in small fortunes from sex tourism from perverts.

The piece concludes with this bit:

Homeland Security instructs Americans: “If you see something, say something.” But at what point do our instincts compel us to act? And when does our fear of getting involved stop us? What causes someone to perceive one thing when an entirely different thing is happening?

I’ve been thinking about this for weeks and have no clear answers. And that’s what disturbs me the most.

I don't think any of us have clear answers...but I think, even if we hurt feelings, we just HAVE to err on the side of child protection. If we have a feeling that there might be something amiss, we need to trust our instincts. If we're so afraid of hurting someone feelings that we'd let an abductor get away with a kid, that's what's really messed up. I'd rather be humiliated--and apologize--for my error than let a molester get away with a kid.

If something like that happened in my family unit (and it has happened, just not to the "You're an abductor" extent, more like a "Is that kid adopted?" kind of thing) you just have to reach for the INTENT of the speaker. Do they mean ill? Are they being obtusely or intrusively curious? Are they concerned for the welfare of the child? And then, based on what you learn at that point, use the event as a teachable moment, if needed. Sometimes, all people need is a little exposure to different types of families to start to wise up.

And....on second edit, after re-reading the article, I have to wonder if there was a "specific threat" in the area. Clearly, that HS guy was looking for someone or something with those binoculars...

Lastly, I think if the guy really wanted to put the point home, he should have taken a picture of the HS guy and used THAT to illustrate his article--after all, he's a professional photographer.

There was nothing more I could say, nor did I need to hear any more explanations from him. I thought about asking for his business card or his name, but instead I just walked away, feeling exposed.

He should have left the HS guy feeling a bit "exposed." He could have even taken the shot in such a way as to obscure the guy's face, if he liked--but he'd know who he was.

And I hope he wrote a letter to HS telling them how he felt about how this guy handled the interaction. I do think the guy could have used more training. It would be interesting, indeed, if HS wrote back and said "We don't have any people assigned to that ferry...." Now THAT would be ... weird! But it's not like people don't imitate police to make themselves feel big--Scott Brown's brother is in JAIL for doing just that!