Dynamics of Domestic Abuse

[Gormy Cuss]

6. Sometimes the victim wants out but sees no way to do that.

-Societal messages that working it out is always better than divorce, or that fighting back is the answer even your partner is stronger than you. Not that long ago it was common for the justice system to treat domestic violence as a personal dispute rather than a legal matter.
-No family able to help out the victim.
-No domestic violence shelter with room for her and her kids (shelters had a bed for her but no place for her kids.)
-A lack of job skills/work experience or other barriers against self-sufficiency.
-The very real fear, after months/years of escalating violence, that trying to leave will escalate the violence to murder.

All of the above are reasons I've heard from family members and friends. When I was young I used to get mad at the victims out of my own frustration but I grew to understand that my anger should be placed squarely on the abuser and on an inadequate social safety net.