General Discussion

ann---

(1,933 posts)

64. What good does

Tue Sep 9, 2014, 12:15 AM

Sep 2014

marrying an abuser because you have his child mean when you might be dead the next time he hits you and then the child has no one to protect it?

I don't know what HER reasons are for marrying him after that, but I can tell you, even if that were the FIRST time a man hit me, I'd be gone immediately, one kid or ten kids is beside the point.

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For those of you criticizing (victim-blaming) Janay Palmer for marrying Ray Rice: [View all] pnwmom Sep 2014 OP

Life is messy. nt ZombieHorde Sep 2014 #1

It's awful shenmue Sep 2014 #2

it would have looked jamzrockz Sep 2014 #3

Yeah, I would absolutely put up with another year's worth of beatings. Sheldon Cooper Sep 2014 #4

Some of these posts are crazy making for me. sufrommich Sep 2014 #5

Your Sheldon gifs are perfect for that response arcane1 Sep 2014 #10

Ofc my comment jamzrockz Sep 2014 #12

You're assuming he never hit her before. The next time she could be dead. n/t pnwmom Sep 2014 #23

I'd bet he has hit her before. cwydro Sep 2014 #73

Me, too. If this was the first time, he would have been shocked and remorseful. pnwmom Sep 2014 #74

If he yelled at her or maybe slapped her, maybe, just maybe he'd get a second chance. rhett o rick Sep 2014 #46

punches and knocks her out Lefta Dissenter Sep 2014 #53

plus all I have in my bucket...a lot! DocMac Sep 2014 #56

wow. Really? fishwax Sep 2014 #6

Because women should always worry about how things 'look' leftstreet Sep 2014 #7

Then why jamzrockz Sep 2014 #9

You don't know what she thought leftstreet Sep 2014 #13

The NFL and Rice were obviously pressuring her to have that press conference and to go through pnwmom Sep 2014 #20

That's ok jamzrockz Sep 2014 #25

There is not a low chance for an abuser to stop abusing, sheshe2 Sep 2014 #41

^^that^^ (n/t) Lefta Dissenter Sep 2014 #54

Did you even watch the video? daschess1987 Sep 2014 #69

Do you have any clue what it is like to be a single woman TBF Sep 2014 #76

There are a number of books chervilant Sep 2014 #42

Maybe she feels safer now that the eyes of the world are on him? gollygee Sep 2014 #47

That's what I was thinking too. n/t nomorenomore08 Sep 2014 #62

Listen to this Harvard grd talk about her relationship.. likesmountains 52 Sep 2014 #55

wtf? elehhhhna Sep 2014 #16

Why is everyone acting as if I am speaking Chinese? jamzrockz Sep 2014 #18

Quite frankly, yes. TDale313 Sep 2014 #27

So what? leftstreet Sep 2014 #28

no, you are apparently speaking as one who does not understand the first thing about niyad Sep 2014 #30

Exactly! daschess1987 Sep 2014 #70

it sounds like there really was nobody there for you and your family. please know how very sorry niyad Sep 2014 #82

Thank you, niyad! daschess1987 Sep 2014 #84

Here's an article that might explain it better than some of us have been doing. pnwmom Sep 2014 #33

Actually I fear for her.... sheshe2 Sep 2014 #44

Agree TexasMommaWithAHat Sep 2014 #78

Has it occurred to you that the loss pf the contract might Ilsa Sep 2014 #45

You're acting like that's all happening in a vacuum gollygee Sep 2014 #48

"Am I the only one that sees problem with a woman/man marrying a man/woman when he/she has a nomorenomore08 Sep 2014 #63

I hope you are the only one Dorian Gray Sep 2014 #75

Who cares what idiots think? She went through the marriage that was already planned -- pnwmom Sep 2014 #19

Apparently they even moved the wedding date up. DURHAM D Sep 2014 #37

Their behavior was reprehensible. I hope there's some legal basis for her suing them. nt pnwmom Sep 2014 #39

Baby or not, I don't understand why a woman would marry a man who Arkansas Granny Sep 2014 #8

Victims of domestic violence often blame themselves, as she was ENCOURAGED to do pnwmom Sep 2014 #11

Thank you. nt sufrommich Sep 2014 #14

There are many reasons why women stay with abusers. Ilsa Sep 2014 #49

Yes, I think she should have left him, but it is her decision. My cousin was a Psychologist, napi21 Sep 2014 #15

the steroids don't help either elehhhhna Sep 2014 #17

^^^^^ my first question mopinko Sep 2014 #40

Maybe, but if he punched someone on the football spooky3 Sep 2014 #32

Players in the NFL don't have to punch others on the field. dballance Sep 2014 #50

My point is that certain types of hits are an spooky3 Sep 2014 #52

they are conditioned to be very physically agressive, it can become a habit. bettyellen Sep 2014 #61

I played seven years of football DocMac Sep 2014 #57

Which football hoodlum is this? The elevator guy? cui bono Sep 2014 #21

Yeah, the elevator punch guy. n/t pnwmom Sep 2014 #22

Yeah, just looked it up and saw that. cui bono Sep 2014 #24

Of course it's a terrible reason to get married. pnwmom Sep 2014 #26

I fear for her safety and that of their child underthematrix Sep 2014 #29

I do too dflprincess Sep 2014 #34

Me, too ann--- Sep 2014 #65

K&R! Omaha Steve Sep 2014 #31

;) AuntPatsy Sep 2014 #36

Keith Olbermann lets us know who is actually to blame dflprincess Sep 2014 #35

Wow, that was great! Thanks! nt Logical Sep 2014 #60

I wondered about that but what you said makes sense. Cleita Sep 2014 #38

people put up with stuff until it goes beyond what that person thinks he/she deserves. then they msongs Sep 2014 #43

+++ Cleita Sep 2014 #51

If you haven't been there VA_Jill Sep 2014 #58

She married him shortly after this incident, which leads me to believe mackerel Sep 2014 #59

I'm sure they put a ton of pressure on her. Their behavior was outrageous. n/t pnwmom Sep 2014 #66

What good does ann--- Sep 2014 #64

It was a poor -- but understandable -- decision. Many victims of domestic violence pnwmom Sep 2014 #67

Thanks pnwmom. lovemydog Sep 2014 #68

I still wouldn't marry him! Quantess Sep 2014 #71

That's because you are an emotionally healthy person. But women who stay in relationships pnwmom Sep 2014 #72

After That Video. . . ProfessorGAC Sep 2014 #77

I'll share a story here that I shared in another thread justiceischeap Sep 2014 #79

Thank you for your understanding post. Hopefully it opened some eyes. pnwmom Sep 2014 #80

I don't know how long they've been together justiceischeap Sep 2014 #81

This message was self-deleted by its author UTUSN Sep 2014 #83