Don't ask why Janay Palmer married him. Ask why anyone would blame a victim.

[Triana]

16. In the Jekyll/Hyde personality of an abuser, the monster is the only real one.

The other one is just an illusion, held forth to keep a victim under control and coming back. It's a hard realization to come to after you've fallen in love with the illusion. And these abusive types are VERY charming and generous when they want to be. - when it serves them and the pretense they so deftly maintain to the rest of the world. They can sweep a person off their feet quite well with charm and attentiveness. I personally consider it a warning sign.

Until most of the questions asked are about why the abuser chose to be abusive rather than why the victim did or didn't do - whatever - then we'll never get to the real reasons this is such an epidemic. We're too much asking the wrong questions of the wrong person in these situations.