General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: Why am I always reminded here on DU that women can be abusive just like men? [View all]cascadiance
(19,537 posts)... and to try and make a false equivalence of "men are victims too", especially after events like this is really sad. We just shouldn't try to do that. It's a real problem for many women and we need to see how we can rectify this.
Now, there are perhaps other things that should be looked at, like societal pressures on men to be "tough" in order to be held in high regard, that can lead to these situations for some misguided individuals that channel "being tough" in horribly wrong ways.
And perhaps there are many cases were there are mental abuse issues that go back and forth and one could argue that these might be more "equivalent", but that is a completely different discussion that should be done in different contexts, and should not be used to defuse the horrible tragedies of domestic violence against women.
Men right now should look for their feminine side and reach out to women around them they know to help them feel comfortable around them, and not feel like so many men in society are a threat to them. Then those men who are abusive towards women while "being tough" will stand out more as the problems that they are and we can perhaps be more able to do something about it in situations where things could get out of hand.
There's a time and place for many different discussions about men and women relationships, and perhaps we should have more thoughtful threads at other times, etc. but to try and minimize the large problem of male violence towards women after events like this in these topics of threads is not one of them.