General Discussion

laundry_queen

(8,646 posts)

34. I have had to do that before.

Sun Sep 14, 2014, 02:02 AM

Sep 2014

I was physically and emotionally abused and sometimes my first instinct is to lash out. I've never hit my kids because when I feel myself getting that angry, I put MYSELF in time out. I let the kids know why too. I tell them I'm so angry that I feel like I might do or say something I shouldn't, so I need time to cool down. And I go to my room. Usually when I do that (I've only done it just over a half dozen times as a parent - my oldest is 17) my kids are so shocked that they later apologize with no prompting and behave perfectly for quite some time after that.

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Do you approve of hitting children to punish them, under certain conditions? [View all] Nye Bevan Sep 2014 OP

My "yes" vote is for spankings only. deathrind Sep 2014 #1

Spanking a 4 year OK with you? Beaverhausen Sep 2014 #5

^ this AnalystInParadise Sep 2014 #6

That makes no sense, literally less sense than spanking kids at younger ages than 12... Humanist_Activist Sep 2014 #13

Instill the fear of being beaten early, huh? Scootaloo Sep 2014 #27

Not arguing for it, I just find it fucking stupider than using violence as discipline.... Humanist_Activist Sep 2014 #43

Seriously? Spanking 12-17 year olds is okay? NaturalHigh Sep 2014 #31

ugh. the component of that that's really sickening is cali Sep 2014 #41

Not really AnalystInParadise Sep 2014 #50

I was never spanked tammywammy Sep 2014 #52

Message auto-removed Name removed Sep 2014 #58

I disagree AnalystInParadise Sep 2014 #62

Drug addiction is very complex JonLP24 Sep 2014 #66

yeah. I buy that. Not. spanking a teenager is sick. cali Sep 2014 #69

I disagree AnalystInParadise Sep 2014 #71

No. It's not merely a difference in opinion. cali Sep 2014 #74

Fortunately AnalystInParadise Sep 2014 #75

ROFLMAO. Brickbat Sep 2014 #47

Your teens really dreaded a spanking more than losing their cellphone privileges? moriah Sep 2014 #63

Kids weren't allowed AnalystInParadise Sep 2014 #64

See, it wouldn't have worked on me. moriah Sep 2014 #68

This is the 1st time I've heard of this method gwheezie Sep 2014 #77

Sticks? nt Logical Sep 2014 #10

No, but if a child (or adult) is about to touch something dangerous, I may smack their hand. NYC_SKP Sep 2014 #2

Sooooo . . . Laffy Kat Sep 2014 #61

Your example is a great one, it's nice when there is time to consider kinder ways to react. NYC_SKP Sep 2014 #70

No, No, No BlueJazz Sep 2014 #3

Never under any circumstances. morningfog Sep 2014 #4

You're putting tickling and picking up in the same bracket as smacking? Turborama Sep 2014 #7

Not in the same argument. morningfog Sep 2014 #12

Well, I wholeheartedly agree with this... Turborama Sep 2014 #20

Do you have children? oberliner Sep 2014 #8

I do. morningfog Sep 2014 #15

That is interesting oberliner Sep 2014 #21

My son used to tell us when he needed to be punished notadmblnd Sep 2014 #54

People who tickle without consent are SADISTS, in my experience. Manifestor_of_Light Sep 2014 #29

wow. Weird. laundry_queen Sep 2014 #32

That's awful. Manifestor_of_Light Sep 2014 #38

This sub-thread reminds me of a memorable Louie episode JonLP24 Sep 2014 #67

This message was self-deleted by its author Manifestor_of_Light Sep 2014 #30

I dunno, I think pretend fighting for boys teaches them self-control. joshcryer Sep 2014 #36

I never allowed that. notadmblnd Sep 2014 #55

Nope. NaturalHigh Sep 2014 #9

Never. john kale Sep 2014 #11

Welcome to DU, john. ScreamingMeemie Sep 2014 #14

Thanks a lot. john kale Sep 2014 #17

Great post. NaturalHigh Sep 2014 #24

Message auto-removed Name removed Sep 2014 #44

Good observation. laundry_queen Sep 2014 #33

Message auto-removed Name removed Sep 2014 #45

Welcome to DU! yuiyoshida Sep 2014 #48

Message auto-removed Name removed Sep 2014 #49

I believe in walking away when I feel my emotions, my reaction, getting out of hand. ScreamingMeemie Sep 2014 #16

yep, cuz I'm usually mad about some other shit Quayblue Sep 2014 #23

I have had to do that before. laundry_queen Sep 2014 #34

No, hitting a child means there's a serious failure at an attempt to discipline the child... Humanist_Activist Sep 2014 #18

If you're an adult and you have to make your point by hitting your kid with a leather belt tularetom Sep 2014 #19

I voted no davidpdx Sep 2014 #22

I don't believe in violence. flvegan Sep 2014 #25

I voted "no" but only because madamesilverspurs Sep 2014 #26

It Is My Hope Wolf Frankula Sep 2014 #28

"Timeout" is 10000x more effective. joshcryer Sep 2014 #35

I have to agree. I was spanked maybe once or twice as a small child, but I don't really remember it. nomorenomore08 Sep 2014 #40

Physical is quickly forgot. joshcryer Sep 2014 #42

Nope. Not this side of hell. defacto7 Sep 2014 #37

Message auto-removed Name removed Sep 2014 #46

I'm not a fan of corporal punishment, even if I recognize that there are different degrees of it. nomorenomore08 Sep 2014 #39

No. elleng Sep 2014 #51

No. Warren DeMontague Sep 2014 #53

Not under any conditions. BillZBubb Sep 2014 #56

It is never EVER proper to use violence to punish children. MohRokTah Sep 2014 #57

No. Never. Laffy Kat Sep 2014 #59

No, not really. bravenak Sep 2014 #60

It's intresting how similar the defense for 'corperal punishment' is to domestic abuse. Lancero Sep 2014 #65

I don't approve, but sometimes it can't be helped fadedrose Sep 2014 #72

No. Never. a la izquierda Sep 2014 #73

I remember only being hit once gwheezie Sep 2014 #76

If God asks, I'll think about it jberryhill Sep 2014 #78