update on my husband.

[SharonAnn]

191. Treasure this time together. It's a special intimacy to be present with someone

when they are facing this. I was with my husband during his cancer, chemotherapy, and final days. And the only thing I would've changed about the last few weeks of my husband's life are that I would've spent more time sitting with him and touching him, holding his hand or cuddling with him. And I would've given him more lotion rubs on his hands and feet/legs because he loved those and now I realize that the sense of touch is s-o-o-o-o important. Even when he was hardly conscious, he would've been able to feel the touching and stroking, and the warmth of lying next to me.

It was such a gift of intimacy, and one that was certainly unexpected, it remains a warmth in my heart.

Yes, there will be sorrow, but today you can really be WITH him and let yourselves love each other.

With love and special tenderness for you and your husband, from SharonAnn.

P.S. The Four Things That Matter Most: a book by Dr. Ira Byock:
1. Please forgive me.
2. I forgive you.
3. Thank you.
4. I love you.

What Dying People Want: a book by Dr Ira Byock:
Being Touched, Life Review, Speaking the Truth, Longing to Belong, Self-Realization, Transcendence.