update on my husband.

[juajen]

197. After two years without my husband of 47 years, I can tell you a little of my experience.

For a while, it is like you've lost an arm and a leg and half your brain also. The grief was horrible and the tears copious. Do NOT take anti-depressants, drink alcohol, or take any kind of medication that is not necessary to your physical health. Your mental health is a road only you can travel. Your loss, though great, will diminish. I read a lot, talked to my children a lot, and my best friend and sister were my constant phone companions. I found coffee to be indispensable. I stopped smoking over ten years ago and drink rarely, and not to excess. Treat yourself to food you love in moderation, go out to eat a lot and not to places the both of you loved. Stay up as long as you like and watch television and movies as much as you like, any thing to get your mind to re-program. This is a time when you can justify being totally selfish. Whatever it takes, as long as it doesn't hurt you mentally or physically, just feel better. Choose a time, now and after he goes, to cry uncontrollably. This will help. Forgive yourself of any mistakes you made in the relationship, and forgive him for any of his. Hugs.