Frankly, Scarlett, you weren't just selfish, you were a damned racist, too

[merrily]

57. There is a difference between doing the work and instilling values.

Also, I very much disagree that, in America, poorer households had grandparents raising kids. For one thing, many grandparents were not even in this country. Others may have needed care themselves.

I am not sure what other work you are referring to that you think kept poor women far away from their kids before women got the vote, but I don't think that was so, either. Whether mom was cooking or doing laundry or cooking or anything else, the kids were there, too, "helping" and learning as they went along.

And, even if grandparents or other members of the extended family were involved, it was probably the females teaching the kids moment to moment, whether it was how to break an egg or how to say please and thank you, not grandpa or Uncle. So, still women. Even as to those who had slaves, it was mostly women raising the kids.

The early editions of Dr. Spock reference kids joining their parents for dinner and maybe a bedtime story. But, the governess or nanny was also female.

And, in the end, the people most kids want to please most, want approval from most, during their formative years, are parents.

Do you really believe women had no role in shaping the nation's youth and society as a whole until they got the vote?