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kcr

(15,300 posts)
127. Always anecdotes claiming this happens, but never actual evidence
Tue Oct 28, 2014, 02:38 AM
Oct 2014

Child support can and is adjusted.

Articles Reveal The Perils Of Stay At Home Moms. In 3 Words. In Such Arrangement "You're Screwed." TheMastersNemesis Oct 2014 #1
I'd like to see the numbers on this, by decade. grasswire Oct 2014 #6
I'd like to see the ideologic background of these judges. Is this trend only a big victory Hortensis Oct 2014 #13
Interesting the lawyers were most concerned when it's a female judge. FLPanhandle Oct 2014 #14
Perhaps, but I think mostly women tend to be more clear eyed about, and certainly less Hortensis Oct 2014 #19
You should watch a documentary done by the Canadian Film Board tech3149 Oct 2014 #20
You should post this in its own thread AwakeAtLast Oct 2014 #48
Rather ironic isn't it? Lancero Oct 2014 #24
It's why even older Boomer women who didn't have to work Warpy Oct 2014 #227
Opportunities for ANYONE without recent employment are NIL! napi21 Oct 2014 #2
Exactly abelenkpe Oct 2014 #8
Must be something new, I got divorced 3 years ago and pay alimony. dilby Oct 2014 #3
I'm a stay at home mom who hasn't worked in 20 years. I would hope I would get a chance to at least liberal_at_heart Oct 2014 #4
You might hope for it, but in many regions most job training programs were canceled during the Hortensis Oct 2014 #18
There is no guarantee for anybody. I refuse to let those on here who hate the idea of being married liberal_at_heart Oct 2014 #47
Hi, Lib. I missed your post before and just wanted to say good for you. Hortensis Nov 2014 #238
Staying home to take care of your kids can be a real detriment to your career, Sheldon Cooper Oct 2014 #5
I have a family member who is a stay at home dad. grasswire Oct 2014 #7
Geez AndreaCG Oct 2014 #10
this year the youngest is in kindergarten grasswire Oct 2014 #11
Even while married, I worked full-time at night and took care of the kids during the day Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #78
I was headed down that road... Sen. Walter Sobchak Oct 2014 #233
When I worked in state government I noticed we hired many women with no recent work history. Shrike47 Oct 2014 #9
I'm wondering how many of those enabling jobs might have been canceled by right wing budget cuts...? Hortensis Oct 2014 #16
"Nearly every state is revisiting its laws on alimony — or “maintenance” — in divorce cases" KamaAina Oct 2014 #12
Hardly. Daemonaquila Oct 2014 #15
wow Liberal_in_LA Oct 2014 #17
A prenuptual agreement should be mandatory for the state to recognise a marriage. Donald Ian Rankin Oct 2014 #21
actually a very good idea etherealtruth Oct 2014 #32
I'd go with that. I think marriage is quite worthless nowadays anyway. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #68
I help middle aged women going through divorce Sienna86 Oct 2014 #128
that type of agreement makes sense. samsingh Oct 2014 #182
One reason I oppose marriage. alarimer Oct 2014 #22
I think this would be more a case for opposing having children FLPanhandle Oct 2014 #23
Not entirely GummyBearz Oct 2014 #39
In life we all take some risk and sometimes good things happen and sometimes bad things liberal_at_heart Oct 2014 #25
But what would happen if you weren't granted AndreaCG Oct 2014 #29
It's certainly not a bad idea for everybody to be aware of the divorce and alimony laws in their liberal_at_heart Oct 2014 #30
Plus you'll split marital assets, so it's not like you'd be in the gutter. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #105
Always have been against alimony. Always will be. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #26
What a shock n/t kcr Oct 2014 #31
ya. isnt it. nt seabeyond Oct 2014 #33
I wonder if that poster, GummyBearz Oct 2014 #41
What is silly about a father getting custody? n/t kcr Oct 2014 #42
"a good father a chance at primary custody of a child in a divorce" Scout Oct 2014 #171
Until Equal Pay for Equal Work Liberalynn Oct 2014 #27
It has been the law for 51 years. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #44
Then until that law actually starts being actually enforced Liberalynn Oct 2014 #45
I wonder if this works when it's the man LibertyLover Oct 2014 #28
Yes, I've read articles about women wanting alimony reform bc they pay it. tammywammy Oct 2014 #35
The odds of a man getting alimony certainly has to be lower. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #55
This message was self-deleted by its author kcr Oct 2014 #57
Hopefully child support is a different matter bhikkhu Oct 2014 #34
Child support is separate from alimony. n/t tammywammy Oct 2014 #36
Kids can't just be put aside, though. kcr Oct 2014 #37
I doubt anyone agreed to the arrangement of supporting anyone after divorce. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #38
Of course they didn't. Most people don't expect to divorce when they marry. kcr Oct 2014 #40
It doesn't matter if they agreed to it or not. kcr Oct 2014 #85
How is that implicit at all? LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #113
Planned or not, the divorce happens. How is it right for one to leave the other hanging kcr Oct 2014 #119
I answered. It's not my fault if you don't like the answer. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #133
Both. So why does only one face the consequence? kcr Oct 2014 #134
Because in the real world choices have consequences. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #135
Choices have consequences. kcr Oct 2014 #136
Am I not typing in English or something? LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #137
Are people forced to marry stay at home spouses? kcr Oct 2014 #138
What the hell are you even talking about? LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #143
You have not answered why the working spouse doesn't have to face any consequences kcr Oct 2014 #144
Why does the working spouse own the SAHP anything? LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #148
Because taking care of children isn't work? IdaBriggs Oct 2014 #145
It's more of a parental duty. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #149
Child care and care giving do have monetary value. IdaBriggs Oct 2014 #164
Slap all that on a resume then... LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #169
Here's a clue. They don't. kcr Oct 2014 #203
Because one partner didn't voluntarily choose to remove themselves from the workforce. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #220
How do you figure? kcr Oct 2014 #221
Have we gotten to the point that you are so impervious to reason... LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #224
I'm not the one impervious to reason kcr Oct 2014 #225
And, now you have to moved to just making things up. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #228
It is not implicit that one will be left in poverty because of that lack of buildup in work history kcr Oct 2014 #230
How are the results of not having a work history... LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #231
Then why not abolish all divorce laws by that logic? kcr Oct 2014 #232
Because that would be idiotic. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #235
That's really selfish. Feral Child Oct 2014 #154
That's an excellent summation of an argument you just made up in your head. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #170
part of that SAHP/worker bargain is the SAHP is tying retirement into the future of the worker. seabeyond Oct 2014 #172
Why wouldn't that be covered... LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #177
here is the thing lost, and i am gonna actually take the time to spell it out the best i can. seabeyond Oct 2014 #180
Except instead of boxes, the guy in the green shorts... lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #188
no he isnt. cause the little ones have gotten on each side lifting the big one up.... seabeyond Oct 2014 #190
"hardly any part of the conversation though, is it?" lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #192
o... mg. i am washing my dog. done. seabeyond Oct 2014 #193
priceless graphic!! n/t deek Oct 2014 #209
Well, that was a fairly respectful answer... LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #234
just about there. not quite. actually, i am not the fan of maintenance/alimony. seabeyond Oct 2014 #236
Retirement <> another person's wages. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #185
It's the internet. Feral Child Oct 2014 #173
Apparently. LostInAnomie Oct 2014 #174
Even with 50/50 physical custody, child support is used as a proxy alimony. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #56
Because children don't cost anything? kcr Oct 2014 #61
Don't start that crap. READ what I posted. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #62
It isn't arbitrary. It's a formula based on salary. kcr Oct 2014 #63
Even with near equal salaries, support can be up to 25% of a person's net income. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #64
Can be up to. You say it yourself. kcr Oct 2014 #67
Again, you didn't read my post. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #70
Find an example n/t kcr Oct 2014 #71
FUCKING ME! Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #75
No one is a fake feminist kcr Oct 2014 #77
In some cases, it's NOT necessary. Sorry, child support should not be any parent's right of passage Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #80
So, what mythical child requires no food, clothing or medical expenses? kcr Oct 2014 #88
Are you deliberately being obtuse? Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #91
I'm reading you loud and clear n/t kcr Oct 2014 #93
No, you're not. You've retrench into your "man must pay" attitude. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #96
No, mine is childen shouldn't starve attitude kcr Oct 2014 #97
Post removed Post removed Oct 2014 #99
I'm only responding to what you're typing in this thread kcr Oct 2014 #103
Because they make 2/3 of the joint income treestar Oct 2014 #122
Tell that to the men that went to jail for it davidn3600 Oct 2014 #126
Always anecdotes claiming this happens, but never actual evidence kcr Oct 2014 #127
No you have not treestar Oct 2014 #150
No, it is not treestar Oct 2014 #120
Good. Alimony is the ultimate expression of patriarchy. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #43
Equality laundry_queen Oct 2014 #46
+1. Perfectly illustrated. Nt seabeyond Oct 2014 #49
! Bobbie Jo Oct 2014 #50
My new favorite pic. N/t. Whiskeytide Oct 2014 #72
Only when it's convenient. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #66
It's gender neutral now treestar Oct 2014 #162
And people wonder why the marriage rate keeps falling AwakeAtLast Oct 2014 #51
If alimony is granted, it should be for a very limited amount of time. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #52
It doesn't mean a lifetime. That is rarely granted. n/t kcr Oct 2014 #54
My cheating, abusive ex-wife tried to get alimony. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #53
remember that old saying you'd never die wishing you'd spent more time at the office? Skittles Oct 2014 #58
Not sure where you went with that. LMAO! n/t Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #59
lots of gals fall short of retirement savings / social security Skittles Oct 2014 #60
So the men that used to be in their life should be on the hook for how long as a result? ;) Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #65
If the man doesn't want to be on the hook, don't have a wife that stays home to raise his kids. n/t kcr Oct 2014 #69
So the wife has no control over her decisions and therefore is expunged of any personal choice she.. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #73
Oh, so men are forced to marry and have stay at home wives? They have no say in this? kcr Oct 2014 #74
So women are incapable of making their own decisions or having a thought in their brain? Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #76
Nice to know you think they can be tossed aside like garbage and left on the street. kcr Oct 2014 #79
So how long does a man need to pay extortion (alimony) after a marriage? Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #82
At least until the ex can get on their feet. kcr Oct 2014 #86
Depends on the exit. If the wive was cheating.... tough shit. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #89
But what if it was the husbun... not tough shit then I'm guessing? kcr Oct 2014 #90
The husband doesn't usually ask (or granted if they ask) alimony anyway. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #94
Oh, really? kcr Oct 2014 #95
That's your opinion AndreaCG Oct 2014 #92
So, I should pay my ex-wife (who was a lazy sack the entire marriage) Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #98
If you stayed in the marriage and let her stay home to raise your kids, yes. kcr Oct 2014 #101
Post removed Post removed Oct 2014 #102
Do you know what this thread is about? kcr Oct 2014 #104
My goodness you're a bitter person AndreaCG Oct 2014 #106
Isn't it ridiculous? kcr Oct 2014 #107
I'm bitter because I don't think a husband should be on the hook forever (or near forever) Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #109
They are almost never on the hook forever. This is a nonexistent problem being solved. kcr Oct 2014 #110
I read your post perfectly well AndreaCG Oct 2014 #112
That's not the law treestar Oct 2014 #123
I think in most cases individual circumstances and behavior outweigh any stereotypes bhikkhu Oct 2014 #165
Yours is a more reasonable post AndreaCG Oct 2014 #167
This message was self-deleted by its author seabeyond Oct 2014 #168
The kids love their mother bhikkhu Oct 2014 #207
Sounds like she was and probably still is depressed kcr Oct 2014 #211
Good point AndreaCG Oct 2014 #213
That's not what he said. AndreaCG Oct 2014 #83
No he twisted mine but thanks for playing. Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #84
So how did you react when your husband ordered you out of the house and into paid work? lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #176
because you gave nothing in the partnership when you were SAHP and your wife worked? really? seabeyond Oct 2014 #181
Certainly no more than my wife was giving. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #183
O k ... . So? right there puts you on a level playing field for dividing assets, right? seabeyond Oct 2014 #184
So my contribution to the household while a SAHP... lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #186
i asked you, that yes, you gave as much as she gave, in this partnership. at this point, seabeyond Oct 2014 #187
In my case it's simple. We both spent time as SAHPs lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #189
twice now, you still did not answer a simple question. because things are not equal at that point, seabeyond Oct 2014 #191
You're not hearing me. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #194
so... reality does not matter, you have your position and unequal works for you. seabeyond Oct 2014 #195
What I hope I'm making clear is my opinion of slavery. n/t lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #196
for you to define is as slavery, really does not put you in a good light. i know you are seabeyond Oct 2014 #198
Maybe employers can start using that flawed logic. kcr Oct 2014 #208
Since we are in a thread about divorce, I would assume you would be aware that it exists. kcr Oct 2014 #212
Let me get this straight. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #214
If they don't want to be married to a SAHM kcr Oct 2014 #215
Because equality! and self determination! I am woman, hear me roar... for alimony! n/t lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #175
What about the determination of men? As I've asked before. Who made them marry stay at home wives? kcr Oct 2014 #202
What if that wasn't brought up at the time of the marriage? davidn3600 Oct 2014 #205
Who cares if it wasn't brought up at the time of the marriage? kcr Oct 2014 #210
did I fucking say that? Skittles Oct 2014 #81
Our boomers who did not divorce JustAnotherGen Oct 2014 #147
You stay home for 25 years and raise the kids. SheilaT Oct 2014 #87
So marital assets are split. That could be a lot of money. n/t Darkhawk32 Oct 2014 #100
Why shouldn't they be split? treestar Oct 2014 #124
Agreed. laundry_queen Oct 2014 #108
I left out the moving part. SheilaT Oct 2014 #115
Another thing laundry_queen Oct 2014 #117
But that's not the way it works in 2014 davidn3600 Oct 2014 #116
And those same courts are cheerfully SheilaT Oct 2014 #118
Yes. It's older women being hit hardest by this. kcr Oct 2014 #132
Yeah, it's a great deal for the high income spouse. Not so great for the kids. pnwmom Oct 2014 #111
If he provides a house, can he sell it when the kids turn 18? davidn3600 Oct 2014 #129
And yet they do kcr Oct 2014 #130
Why should he? He was rolling in money. Don't you think his young adult kids would care pnwmom Oct 2014 #140
That's the thing right there... davidn3600 Oct 2014 #146
who raises the kids? seabeyond Oct 2014 #156
Television and XBOX? davidn3600 Oct 2014 #157
wrong answer. an adult is needed, but then you know that. you just like to sit with your seabeyond Oct 2014 #166
Women's issues to you is women being protected from accepting responsibility davidn3600 Oct 2014 #178
what a fuckin bullshit, insulting, anti woman statement thru out your post. seabeyond Oct 2014 #179
Why are the men/working partner protected from the same decision? Why no responsibility for them? kcr Oct 2014 #204
Who benefited? davidn3600 Oct 2014 #217
Seriously? kcr Oct 2014 #218
In exchange for possibly lifetime alimony? Not a bad deal, really davidn3600 Oct 2014 #222
No one is stopping them, dude. In fact, there are more SAHDs. kcr Oct 2014 #223
how does a husband benefit with a wife staying at home? seriously? if you can actually ask that seabeyond Oct 2014 #237
Sure. Just remember who picks your nursing home. Starry Messenger Oct 2014 #151
Isn't there a division of assets and property when a couple splits? Violet_Crumble Oct 2014 #139
The US does not have much in the way of social safety nets kcr Oct 2014 #141
He was a lawyer who knew how to work the system, pnwmom Oct 2014 #142
So this is what institutional slavery looks like... Kalidurga Oct 2014 #114
Baloney, show me a state that has actually changed its law treestar Oct 2014 #121
A few years ago Kansas changed the formula they used SheilaT Oct 2014 #158
. . . treestar Oct 2014 #159
Kansas law is similar. SheilaT Oct 2014 #160
another one (Pennsylvania) treestar Oct 2014 #161
"It's ripping your heart out through your wallet" davidn3600 Oct 2014 #125
"staying at home" is always a dicey proposition.. SoCalDem Oct 2014 #131
I wonder where the author of this article got her facts? merrily Oct 2014 #152
My Ex Got Zip Sparhawk60 Oct 2014 #153
But what if the wife stayed at home by choice malaise Oct 2014 #155
The laws try to get the parties started again treestar Oct 2014 #163
You're on the wrong narrative. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #197
this sounds like... oh, i dont know, reading an MRA site. seabeyond Oct 2014 #199
You have a point malaise Oct 2014 #200
of course there are bad bad women. i am sorry i did not put that forefront in each seabeyond Oct 2014 #201
It's not about bad women. It's about bad society. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2014 #216
No it is not Jeff. But that is what you wanted to hear about, seabeyond Oct 2014 #219
The author cites a couple cases known to one attorney. Not exactly stellar research. WinkyDink Oct 2014 #206
Military men? READ THIS AND DUMP LAZY ASSESS before it's too late! boatsfra Oct 2014 #226
My SO was a stay at home mom when she was married to her ex Ex Lurker Oct 2014 #229
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