Anothe Bill Cosby victim tells her story and it's DEVASTATING!!! SHIT!!!!

[Wella]

5. If the rape is part of a manipulative power relationship, the young woman might not realize:

1. That she has been raped (especially if drugs were used)
2. That what she has experienced is actually rape (especially if she has no model for normal male/female relations)
3. That she's not just imagining things (especially if she feels the need to please this man for some reason)
4. That the man doesn't really love her or care about her (especially if she has feelings for him).

The "women" Cosby allegedly raped were mostly "barely legal teens" (and at least one seems to have been a virgin at the time). Since some of these cases are quite old (dating to the 80s) they occurred before our current generational awareness of rape and all the different kinds of rape.

Remember, when most people think of rape, they think of the creepy stranger who jumps out of the bushes with a knife--ie, stranger rape. The whole concept of "date rape" was in its infancy in the 80s, and the idea that a man you trusted--hell, that America trusted, in Cosby's case--could really rape you was a mind-blowing concept.

I was in college in the 80s, and the RAs taught you to look for strangers who might rape you: to be careful in parking garages, to carry your key--yes your key--as a weapon. For anyone who remembers the comedienne Elayne Boozler, she did a really funny routine on this advice. But no one told you about how a male acquaintance that you thought was ok might rape you. The concept wasn't even really discussed.

As to why these women waited:

Bowman DIDN'T wait. She told several people at the time and even went to the police, who told her that no one would ever believe her. That was common too: the cops were not as well educated about rape as they are now and they would assume women were lying or might not even bother to file charges if the guy was famous. Things are slowly changing, but people still accuse women who come forward as being liars.

For those that did wait, just remember that when a rich and powerful man rapes you and you come forward, he will do everything he can to ruin your life--and he has the means to do it. If he is in the public eye, the media and the (adoring) public will defend him to the hilt, even if there is proof. Remember, even Ray Rice--a man who was VIDEOTAPED physically assaulting his fiance--had supporters, even among women. People have a tendency to believe their hearts and not their eyes (or common sense) when a public figure does bad things.

For many women, just getting out of the rape situation alive and not having their lives ruined is worth the pain of the silence of not coming forward. That is why many women move on and carry the pain with them, a pain that poisons their own lives. Eventually, when this woman is older and realizes that she needs to do right by the raped teenager she was, she will often speak out as an adult. It's part of the healing process.