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hollysmom

(5,946 posts)

7. my father died a while ago, he was just entering the paralyzed state

Mon Dec 29, 2014, 02:50 PM

Dec 2014

spent most of the days in front of the TV in a wheel chair, could hardly talk, yet somehow he teleported to his dresser (I say this facetiously he could move very slowly) and took all the medicine he could find and asked us not to take him to the hospital, let him die. And so we did. His last stint in the hospital was a night mare, they tied him in his bed so he could not turn at all because he could very slowly get out of bed and they did not want to be responsible if he fell. They wold not loosen them even when he had visitors, but I always took it off anyway, and would help him walk a little bit, leaning on me. He just found very little to live for at that point.

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My 93 year uncle died a painful death two plus years ago [View all] malaise Dec 2014 OP

Ugh. Erich Bloodaxe BSN Dec 2014 #1

For real malaise Dec 2014 #4

I'm sorry that your uncle had pain. panader0 Dec 2014 #2

And he had an absolutely fabulous life malaise Dec 2014 #3

Why wasn't he in hospice care 840high Dec 2014 #5

A LOT of people misjudge exactly when to start hospice. Erich Bloodaxe BSN Dec 2014 #6

Also people don't realize that hospice care can be for a long time csziggy Dec 2014 #16

He wanted to die at home n/t malaise Dec 2014 #8

Thank you for 840high Dec 2014 #23

my father died a while ago, he was just entering the paralyzed state hollysmom Dec 2014 #7

Good children let their parents malaise Dec 2014 #9

good of you to say, still have guilt hollysmom Dec 2014 #10

Our mom had a living will malaise Dec 2014 #11

My mom had one too but hollysmom Dec 2014 #15

My 91 yo father was confined to a wheel chair, mnhtnbb Dec 2014 #12

My dad had dementia too. panader0 Dec 2014 #14

Why do you feel guilt? malaise Dec 2014 #20

If I had left immediately, I might have seen him still alive. panader0 Dec 2014 #21

Think about what you did for them that was right and get over the guilt malaise Dec 2014 #22

Let the guilt go . .. hugs 840high Dec 2014 #25

I'm sure you've heard this, but just in case... renate Dec 2014 #18

I've long believed it wasn't a coincidence when he chose to stop eating. mnhtnbb Dec 2014 #19

Yes. We knew Dad's time 840high Dec 2014 #24

They need us PasadenaTrudy Dec 2014 #13

yes hollysmom Dec 2014 #17