Some people should never be allowed to be doctors!

[TreasonousBastard]

30. I have been in these situations, and the one thing they had in common

is that the people involved are torn.

End of life issues are rarely what one expects, and even less so when no real planning or thought has been involved. I've seen normally sensible people go to mediums and faith healers for some small bit of hope, and I've seen the agony of "pull the plug" decisions. I had to make one of those myself, and I couldn't advise anyone else what to do simply because they aren't me and the patient wasn't my relative.

From what you say, the doctor sounds insensitive, although I don't know if that's how he actually approached your friend or if that's the effect on her when he gave her the choices. Many hospitals have end-of-life counseling that tries to make the choices less painful.

In the end, we can't cheat death. We can put it off a little longer and we can make it a little less painful, but while modern medicine has performed miracles, it has also given us terrible choices to be made.

My only advice is to try not to channel the grief and anger at the situation toward other individuals-- It is entirely normal for your friend to be upset at the pending death of her mother, but if possible she should try not to take it out on the people around her.