General Discussion

DutchLiberal

(5,744 posts)

367. And that is not the worst part of that thread.

Thu May 3, 2012, 05:40 PM

May 2012

The real disgrace is that I got a post hidden because somebody alerted and took the subject-line of that one post deliberately out of context. And of course the jurors didn't bother to read the whole thread to read my previous, much more elaborate comments which gave a totally different picture of my thoughts than the one line the alerter abused to get me kicked out of the thread and brand me as someone I'm not.

My best friend in high school was a rape survivor. So is my cousin. Yet I have to sit here and be told I'm "condoning sexual assault" because I don't think consensual sex with an inexperienced girl is assault. Like they said it was assault when president Kennedy had sex with his secretary. So they tricked me in explaining my position, then alerted on me, had my post hidden and now I am 'branded'...

Some people on DU play these games. They go to great lenghts to blacken other good members. Character assassination is their preferred tool. Defamation and vilification are no strangers to them. And once you disagree with them in another thread, on another subject, all they have to do is point at the transparency page they helped to create by deliberately misrepresenting someone's views in the first place.

That's how they roll.

They're not interested in discussion. They're not interested in other people's points of view, unless those are in line with theirs. If they are, there will be no end to patting the other on the back, handing out compliments, spreading hugging emoticons etc. But when you're not in agreement, the only thing you'll get is "lol"-s, "rofl"-s, maybe a "Geez!" or "sigh" if you're lucky. That's not what I call a discussion.

If you don't agree with them on all issues all the time, you're a sexist and a misogynist.

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Highlight:

Women only: Regarding the use of the term 'girls' to describe women. [View all] redqueen May 2012 OP

I am not a girl RobertEarl May 2012 #1

A real egalitarian? redqueen May 2012 #2

it takes serious insensitivity... CTyankee May 2012 #11

Right. RobertEarl May 2012 #16

Oh, you saint, you! CTyankee May 2012 #26

Undertsandable, but take a moment to think about it. redqueen May 2012 #32

Do what you want to do RobertEarl May 2012 #36

and the white male conservative says to maddow.... you girls, .... in order to diminish, dismiss seabeyond May 2012 #39

Seems to me RobertEarl May 2012 #48

seems to me that you are purposely trying to be sexist. why? what is the pay off for you? nt seabeyond May 2012 #56

allow me to offer a word here. His purpose is to get attention. CTyankee May 2012 #61

what a woman you are, lol... nt seabeyond May 2012 #64

Post removed Post removed May 2012 #77

now you are just sounding.... creepy. nt seabeyond May 2012 #82

snork iverglas May 2012 #273

ya. i know .... nt seabeyond May 2012 #274

They can't hurt you if you don't let them. sabrina 1 May 2012 #62

who is excited. called a discussion. nd the way and reasons usage like these seabeyond May 2012 #66

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #118

I find it very offensive of you to accuse another poster of being "a problem" simply for disagreeing DutchLiberal May 2012 #75

It'd be nice to get some answers to those questions. nt redqueen May 2012 #40

Are you not familiar with polling? me b zola May 2012 #109

Since women make up 50% of the population, how are they 'a minority group'? DutchLiberal May 2012 #68

I have explained this to you before. redqueen May 2012 #71

So you're making up your own definitions now? DutchLiberal May 2012 #78

Sweet Jesus. nt redqueen May 2012 #79

Since you seem to have some strange aversion TriMera May 2012 #121

excellent! n/t Scout May 2012 #133

Well, ya know... TriMera May 2012 #152

Yes, we must be kind. They need help. I am more than happy to offer it! CTyankee May 2012 #281

Great presentation nt stevenleser May 2012 #470

but a girl is not a woman. is a boy a man? lmao. nt seabeyond May 2012 #12

Sure. RobertEarl May 2012 #14

He is if he's a good old boy. UnrepentantLiberal May 2012 #300

A man can be a boy Confusious May 2012 #320

And in that sense, women can be girls, too! Lizzie Poppet May 2012 #347

It's always about context. Hell Hath No Fury May 2012 #3

Yes, hence the two middle-ground poll answers. redqueen May 2012 #5

My daughter plays Fast-Pitch softball... Whiskeytide May 2012 #42

Oh no no no... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say I didn't welcome men to post... redqueen May 2012 #45

yes... the are playing off of, mocking that is said and good for them seabeyond May 2012 #51

Yep. EFerrari May 2012 #50

Wow! zappaman May 2012 #90

I think it's more about self-confidence than anger issues. DutchLiberal May 2012 #94

That's a good point. n/t zappaman May 2012 #98

That self-confidence that you're so proud of TriMera May 2012 #167

Yes, you turned women into helpless, powerless victims who can't do anything on their own... DutchLiberal May 2012 #190

That's what you got from my post? TriMera May 2012 #195

That's what you said. DutchLiberal May 2012 #198

"You said women can't have any self-confidence because men (the patriarchy) won't let them." Scout May 2012 #257

Sure, if you cut up the quote it's easy to look like you're right. DutchLiberal May 2012 #277

you know you are a male behaving badly, don't you? noiretextatique May 2012 #441

Please, don't assume men are some pillar of self-confidence. Bladian May 2012 #218

Nobody handed me anything Confusious May 2012 #322

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #326

Same here... redqueen May 2012 #97

But you do seem to have reading issues. EFerrari May 2012 #104

The way you said it... "got up into the face of"... redqueen May 2012 #106

Could be. It's the internet after all and we can't see expressions EFerrari May 2012 #120

"asking for a list of forbidden words just misses the mark entirely" redqueen May 2012 #123

Getting "up in someone's face" is just a literalization of "confronting" EFerrari May 2012 #128

not only can it be done without anger, i use a smile seabeyond May 2012 #131

So if someone would refer to you as a girl, you wouldn't be able to 'get into that guys face'? DutchLiberal May 2012 #129

Yes, I'm sure you were very calm zappaman May 2012 #112

Newsflash 2: You don't have to be angry or combative to confront someone EFerrari May 2012 #115

It means to confront someone angrily zappaman May 2012 #119

I'm not hiring editors today. EFerrari May 2012 #124

"I got up in (his/her) face" is so common among my clients that if I had msanthrope May 2012 #306

I can only imagine that you never take exception when someone says to you LanternWaste May 2012 #122

As a native Texan... redqueen May 2012 #125

But if someone insisted those terms were belittling or insulting, would you stop using them? DutchLiberal May 2012 #130

With them, of course TorchTheWitch May 2012 #168

you are so awesome, consistently and always. seabeyond May 2012 #170

So if someone told me the word "and" is offensive to them, I should stop using "and"? DutchLiberal May 2012 #185

I see "bless your heart" as either genuine concern, or a back-handed compliment LanternWaste May 2012 #290

In my experience, they very often are belittling justabob May 2012 #403

You are correct. n/t zappaman May 2012 #132

Me neither leftynyc May 2012 #134

It depends on the age of the "girl" Quantess May 2012 #4

An elderly senior executive referring to his young secretary? redqueen May 2012 #6

"I'll have my woman order lunch" doesn't sound any better. Quantess May 2012 #46

"I'll have Lisa order lunch" MadrasT May 2012 #73

Well, obviously. Quantess May 2012 #166

cuz, you know, saying "i'll ask my assistant to order lunch" Scout May 2012 #74

The way the question was framed to me by Redqueen Quantess May 2012 #173

When I was 20, it might have bothered me. Now at 50+ it makes me laugh and smile. robinlynne May 2012 #7

Really? redqueen May 2012 #9

When somone is being demeaning, it doesn't matter what term they use. It's demeaning. robinlynne May 2012 #8

interesting poll and let me tell you why. what i voted is not specifically how i feel, seabeyond May 2012 #10

I always use "women" when we are talking about women. I reserve "girls" for what are really CTyankee May 2012 #22

good for you. i really had to condition myself to use woman. i love the word seabeyond May 2012 #27

I have tried and tried to understand why so many women have felt this way. CTyankee May 2012 #37

personally investing the time thinking and discussing this. age seabeyond May 2012 #47

Oh. My. God. DutchLiberal May 2012 #84

Veritably a household of fun! n/t zappaman May 2012 #93

You better believe it. EOTE May 2012 #127

I'm always at a loss as how to properly address the woman half of humanity madokie May 2012 #13

Women are regular people, just like men, and just like men, we have different opinions. redqueen May 2012 #15

Thank you madokie May 2012 #28

i dont know. i have a special place in my heart for my father. he was awfully special, too seabeyond May 2012 #30

Mybad madokie May 2012 #52

ya ya ya. nt seabeyond May 2012 #59

That's biased against women without children!!111! redqueen May 2012 #67

If you are over 30 we can use damsel, under 30 we can use lassie, that work for ya? snooper2 May 2012 #17

Please see the update to the OP. nt redqueen May 2012 #20

Update's cool but I don't think that works very well on the public internet tubes snooper2 May 2012 #23

The clarification wasn't about who should be voting... redqueen May 2012 #25

Why would anyone find this demeaning??? cbdo2007 May 2012 #18

Please see the update to the OP. nt redqueen May 2012 #21

Why would African-American men find "boy" demeaning? Gormy Cuss May 2012 #24

Why would you think I would "diminish" my sister's "worth" by calling her a girl? DutchLiberal May 2012 #88

Is your sister an adult? If she is, then yes you risk diminishing her worth by call her a child. Gormy Cuss May 2012 #140

I seriously think some posters have disconnected their theoretical views from the real world. DutchLiberal May 2012 #193

Never took a gender studies class. I've lived life as a girl and a woman. Gormy Cuss May 2012 #208

I just used that as an example; it wasn't an attack on you. DutchLiberal May 2012 #212

IIRC it was consistent with EEOC guidelines Gormy Cuss May 2012 #224

I don't know what EEOC guidelines are. What does EEOC stand for? DutchLiberal May 2012 #229

Equal Employment Opportunity Commission Gormy Cuss May 2012 #245

I still think it's nonsense. DutchLiberal May 2012 #247

I understand, but it's not considered such under U.S. law. n/t Gormy Cuss May 2012 #261

That's true. Then again, many laws are nonsense, too. DutchLiberal May 2012 #262

so where's your "False Comparison" accusation now? n/t Scout May 2012 #144

I was comparing calling a woman a girl with calling a woman a girl? DutchLiberal May 2012 #194

nope. try again. Scout May 2012 #259

I compared women to women; you compared women to African-Americans. DutchLiberal May 2012 #265

It all depends on context. cbdo2007 May 2012 #89

I was replying to a question of why it would be perceived as demeaning. Gormy Cuss May 2012 #141

I agree. Well said. n/t DLevine May 2012 #160

Because Andrea Dworkin told them to. DutchLiberal May 2012 #87

don't worry your pretty little head... Scout May 2012 #142

OMG!!!!!1!1 You just said 'pretty little head'! I'm gonna alert!!!!1!1 DutchLiberal May 2012 #179

here's a clue: grown women don't like to be called girls; black men don't like to be called boys noiretextatique May 2012 #445

I first chose the third option but after thinking about it... Spazito May 2012 #19

As a dude may I chime in? Taverner May 2012 #29

Yes! Yes of course, sorry redqueen May 2012 #33

the boys in the band? Playing poker with the boys? dmallind May 2012 #43

The perception of "girls" is different than "boys" Taverner May 2012 #63

There's a difference between the plural and the singular..... ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #149

Is there ANY term that... 99Forever May 2012 #31

white male privilege takes us a long way seabeyond May 2012 #34

Many offensive terms are used to reinforce social norms... redqueen May 2012 #38

I'm sure he gets it. He just doesn't agree with it. DutchLiberal May 2012 #96

So he understands these terms are used to maintain a group's dominant status... redqueen May 2012 #99

No, he doesn't agree with your theories about these terms. DutchLiberal May 2012 #103

They're not *my* theories, just as the definition of a minority group is not *my* definition. redqueen May 2012 #110

"Fucksake, why do I bother?" i do not know. why? seabeyond May 2012 #111

Hahahahaha... redqueen May 2012 #116

Okay, then he doesn't agree with SOMEBODY ELSE'S theories that YOU used... DutchLiberal May 2012 #113

oh they get it all right Scout May 2012 #146

Or they just disagree. DutchLiberal May 2012 #200

You forgot the sarcasm tag. n/t Gormy Cuss May 2012 #53

No, my friend ... 99Forever May 2012 #174

I'm sorry about the "actual shit" in your life Gormy Cuss May 2012 #215

What you seem not to want to... 99Forever May 2012 #266

What you seem not to want to understand is this isn't trivial. Gormy Cuss May 2012 #279

REAL gender bias... MadrasT May 2012 #280

Be prepared to have your post alerted on because you "don't think women deserve any respect"... DutchLiberal May 2012 #92

spoken like a true ally noiretextatique May 2012 #450

So now the word... 99Forever May 2012 #462

I don't mind it if it's between girlfriends joking around, sufrommich May 2012 #35

I also prefer "Ma'am" to "Mrs." planetc May 2012 #41

Love this post! redqueen May 2012 #49

I prefer Ms. personnally. Hatchling May 2012 #147

I attribute this more to young people not knowing better and not being taught these things ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #154

I've always found the term seriously creepy. closeupready May 2012 #44

I'd say it's more internalized patriarchy than self-respect issues... redqueen May 2012 #55

Yes, that is an excellent point, thanks. closeupready May 2012 #69

My pleasure! redqueen May 2012 #72

I think it's offensive to dismiss other womens' opinions like that. DutchLiberal May 2012 #102

I find your opinion pretty judgemental of other women ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #165

When in doubt, use "Lady". (nt) Nye Bevan May 2012 #54

yuk... societal enforced rule on behavior. yuk... lol seabeyond May 2012 #60

Not sure if serious... redqueen May 2012 #65

I never complain about being referred to as a "gentleman", Nye Bevan May 2012 #80

Ah, but 'gentlemen' were never property. redqueen May 2012 #85

These rules can be confusing.... Nye Bevan May 2012 #91

They're not rules. redqueen May 2012 #95

In all seriousness, are you saying the word "lady" is some sort of insult? zappaman May 2012 #100

Not at all. redqueen May 2012 #105

not an insult, but not a compliment either. Scout May 2012 #148

Nothing ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #162

"The woman in red, is dancing with me, cheek to cheek..." Nye Bevan May 2012 #176

Nothing wrong with the word "lady" zappaman May 2012 #188

That's disgraceful. She should refer to her boobies as "the women". Nye Bevan May 2012 #197

Ha! zappaman May 2012 #201

The word "boobies" clearly belittles breasts. DutchLiberal May 2012 #205

Post removed Post removed May 2012 #252

it's all about context noiretextatique May 2012 #442

Oh, you better believe "lady" can be offensive as hell TorchTheWitch May 2012 #410

i just posted about "lady" noiretextatique May 2012 #444

Actually, they're very simple, if you just keep two things in mind: DutchLiberal May 2012 #108

no thankyou. Whisp May 2012 #101

Uh oh......re-education time. ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #155

Cue the bad rock song... Quantess May 2012 #282

I don't mind at all so long as the guys don't mind being called "boys" - lynne May 2012 #57

You'd never here me object. ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #156

I have a friend in her 30's who still says "I met a boy!!!" and I think it's endearing Quixote1818 May 2012 #382

What a misandrist! DutchLiberal May 2012 #391

I picked B. woo me with science May 2012 #58

"might sometimes be offensive".... Little Star May 2012 #70

Yes, context means so much... redqueen May 2012 #83

Girls I don't mind abolugi May 2012 #76

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #81

Yes, the context of your taking offense is more personal... redqueen May 2012 #86

It's not the word, but the tone of voice, that tells you if you are being dissed Demeter May 2012 #107

Damn true ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #157

I don't care at all. DevonRex May 2012 #114

Then you must have serious self-respect issues. DutchLiberal May 2012 #117

I just decided a long time ago that DevonRex May 2012 #139

That's a healthy attitude to have! Thanks for your post. DutchLiberal May 2012 #178

Is there a feminine equivalent to the word "guy" tabbycat31 May 2012 #126

Gal. But I hate that word. Sounds too DevonRex May 2012 #135

Really? "Gal" got used a lot in all old movies ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #158

Yes, and "doll" and "broad", which we also cannot use anymore. DutchLiberal May 2012 #206

I think as long as you don't shove a grapefruit in her face...... ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #258

"Guys" denotes mature males....while "girls" aren't mature women. Lars39 May 2012 #137

And this becomes a confusing issue for me. Hatchling May 2012 #151

calif i was raised with hi guys, for everyone. texas is hi yawl..... seabeyond May 2012 #153

Opposite for me. Hatchling May 2012 #164

Being born in the north, but raised in the south from about 10 onwards, Lars39 May 2012 #159

In my family frogmarch May 2012 #136

Your poll went in a direction I did not expect. LanternWaste May 2012 #138

btw... i forgot about your post in all this mess of a thread. i wanted to ask seabeyond May 2012 #291

I have a pretty high tolerance for words of all kinds Blue_In_AK May 2012 #143

No big deal. No deal at all. I actually have important things to concern myself with. WillowTree May 2012 #145

like taking the time to post to tell everyone how many more important Scout May 2012 #150

+1 Little Star May 2012 #295

I just find this to be trivial to the point of being a non-issue. YMMV. WillowTree May 2012 #303

well, then, why did you waste that valuable time to make people laugh on this thread? CTyankee May 2012 #307

I hope your day improves. WillowTree May 2012 #310

Pass. Depends on the situation eridani May 2012 #161

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #163

seriously? lol. nt seabeyond May 2012 #171

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #335

you are a genius. you caught me copy and pasting the poster i replied to. seabeyond May 2012 #336

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #340

ah, copy and pasting is not a matter of excuses, but a reality. seabeyond May 2012 #344

seaglas, if you have read any of my posts in this thread, you would recognize that i too seabeyond May 2012 #337

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #341

i think that is what i have done. nt seabeyond May 2012 #345

That, right there, is the key, I think. DutchLiberal May 2012 #368

And that is not the worst part of that thread. DutchLiberal May 2012 #367

Yes, that was my one and only reason... redqueen May 2012 #182

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #233

Well, since it's a public forum it's not technically 'behind their backs'... DutchLiberal May 2012 #214

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #232

That last thing goes without saying. DutchLiberal May 2012 #242

I suppose it depends on the situation KansDem May 2012 #169

I think people should try not to get so offended all the time lunatica May 2012 #172

If the biggest problem someone has is being called a "girl" or a "lady" Nye Bevan May 2012 #177

My Dad always had a smile on his face when he 'and the boys' (his words) were polly7 May 2012 #180

That silly rhetorical device is used way too often... redqueen May 2012 #184

Do you really think that was sneaky or subtle? redqueen May 2012 #183

yeah... lunatica May 2012 #236

No problem with it at all. nt. polly7 May 2012 #175

Funny, I just had this discussion last night with good friend who is a woman... DCBob May 2012 #181

Since we all live in the patriarchy, terms which belittle women are ubiquitous, it is true. redqueen May 2012 #186

I also forgot to mention my friend "convinced" me not to use the term anymore.. DCBob May 2012 #187

Hope you liked the comic! redqueen May 2012 #189

Yes, very good. DCBob May 2012 #192

That darn patriarchy! DutchLiberal May 2012 #217

I'm more sensitive to it because of DU ecstatic May 2012 #191

It's all about context etherealtruth May 2012 #196

I just use "you people" for everybody. I like to offend unilaterally. bluesbassman May 2012 #199

a question seabeyond May 2012 #202

"Gentleman farmer" (nt) Nye Bevan May 2012 #204

Good question. bluesbassman May 2012 #207

interesting. thanks. nt seabeyond May 2012 #211

I use "gentlemen" to open my business emails to address the multiple males on my contact list.... ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #219

i dont get why the attitude is necessary. i really do not. and yes seabeyond May 2012 #220

I'm sorry....what "attitude"? ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #231

as many posters have said, many of us did not realize the conditioning we have all fallen into using seabeyond May 2012 #235

Your question to the other poster specifically said "You don't use the term gentleman"..... ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #237

you are telling me, when you talk to the men in your office you use gentlemen and not men? seabeyond May 2012 #238

Sorry, I do, I explained the situations I use it in my OP ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #240

So, where's my nearest re-education camp to fix this seabeyond May 2012 #241

ROTFLMAO DutchLiberal May 2012 #244

The attitude that you don't agree with her. DutchLiberal May 2012 #243

This message was self-deleted by its author seabeyond May 2012 #246

lol DutchLiberal May 2012 #248

you were the one that INSISTED on only THREE women on ALL of du had an issue with girls and ALL the seabeyond May 2012 #251

Hyperbole. DutchLiberal May 2012 #253

do you need a link. a quote to YOUR statement. talk about fuckin hyperbole. right in seabeyond May 2012 #254

... DutchLiberal May 2012 #260

This message was self-deleted by its author seabeyond May 2012 #264

You're projecting. DutchLiberal May 2012 #268

and still... i count more than THREE. but hey, ignore it. nt seabeyond May 2012 #270

Enjoy the flamefest by yourself. This is really below my standards. DutchLiberal May 2012 #275

THREE, in the whole wide world, only THREE women prefer to be called a seabeyond May 2012 #276

Dang, Dutch. Mc Mike May 2012 #286

THANK YOU! nt redqueen May 2012 #288

Solidarity, Red. Mc Mike May 2012 #289

i am asking if i can fall in love, another woman is saying mouth dropped open seabeyond May 2012 #292

Thanks, Sea. Mc Mike May 2012 #318

Thanks for your post, I appreciate it. DutchLiberal May 2012 #298

My God. redqueen May 2012 #299

Really? The attack-mode, immediately, again? DutchLiberal May 2012 #304

I guess I should not 'try to teach my grandpa how to suck eggs', but Mc Mike May 2012 #319

Not that you asked for my opinion, redqueen May 2012 #321

If I have your o.k., will do. Mc Mike May 2012 #323

Oh you have more than my ok. redqueen May 2012 #325

Why is my 'sheer volume of posts' "angry revenge" and, for example, seabeyond's isn't? DutchLiberal May 2012 #329

That was just my impression, not meant as an indictment. Mc Mike May 2012 #358

2nd re to 298, per Red's 321 Mc Mike May 2012 #328

You're mixing up two totally different things. DutchLiberal May 2012 #331

I'm sorry you feel that way. It wasn't meant as an attack. Mc Mike May 2012 #364

Third para, fourth para Mc Mike May 2012 #330

5th para, prostitution: Mc Mike May 2012 #348

5th para, porn: Mc Mike May 2012 #350

"Porn is the nazi's way of keeping two people from love," DutchLiberal May 2012 #359

This message was self-deleted by its author Warren DeMontague May 2012 #362

Har har! But I strongly oppose the Birchers. Mc Mike May 2012 #365

This message was self-deleted by its author Warren DeMontague May 2012 #381

Para 5 - 10: Mc Mike May 2012 #357

actually.... seabeyond May 2012 #361

Thank you, sea. I lost Dutch, a couple of posts north of here. Mc Mike May 2012 #366

This message was self-deleted by its author Warren DeMontague May 2012 #383

Your own familiarity is extremely lacking as well, it seems. redqueen May 2012 #385

This message was self-deleted by its author Warren DeMontague May 2012 #408

Thanks for the welcome. Sorry if I offended you. Mc Mike May 2012 #412

This message was self-deleted by its author Warren DeMontague May 2012 #432

Thanks for the welcome, again. Mc Mike May 2012 #433

This message was self-deleted by its author Warren DeMontague May 2012 #438

I didn't pipe up until post 286. Mc Mike May 2012 #440

He was referring to Schrödinger's Rapist redqueen May 2012 #384

Post removed Post removed May 2012 #394

A "girl", was it? redqueen May 2012 #399

All right. +1. Up to speed, now. Mc Mike May 2012 #411

Refreshing to see your posts.... hlthe2b May 2012 #413

Thanks a lot, hl. Mc Mike May 2012 #424

"All black men are potential violent gang members"; "All muslims are potential terrorists" DutchLiberal May 2012 #369

I agree, and I'm so sick of seeing this here. nt. polly7 May 2012 #372

No kidding zappaman May 2012 #373

How DARE you belittle a woman's point of view? DutchLiberal May 2012 #375

You should go to the History of Feminist group if you want to get really sick. DutchLiberal May 2012 #374

You ventured into that den of nastiness? zappaman May 2012 #376

I don't think saying "balls" when you mean "courage" is appropriate on DU3 anymore. DutchLiberal May 2012 #377

Nah ..... I don't go there. polly7 May 2012 #380

Yeah, you'd think that by now, The Patriarchy would have all feminists banned from this website! DutchLiberal May 2012 #389

+ + + + n/t FedUpWithIt All May 2012 #427

You agree? redqueen May 2012 #387

She wasn't replying to that. She was replying to a female DU'er calling all men rapists. DutchLiberal May 2012 #396

Ahem. redqueen May 2012 #386

Either for ONCE, address what I write instead of spamming links or else don't bother me anymore. DutchLiberal May 2012 #388

I read that months ago, as did most other feminists, when it was being discussed. redqueen May 2012 #390

We have never discussed that before and I was never in a discussion about "all men are rapists"... DutchLiberal May 2012 #397

Another excellent and interesting post, along with the Schroedinger's post. Mc Mike May 2012 #414

Comradde PhysioProffe is great redqueen May 2012 #416

First time I've seen the site. Mc Mike May 2012 #420

"feeling very 'entitled'." taht would about sum it up and a wonderful learning example seabeyond May 2012 #421

I tried a few of those here, to see what would bounce back. Mc Mike May 2012 #425

The story of a brave, strong young woman standing up to influential powerful men: DutchLiberal May 2012 #203

So...what are you girls talking about in here? flvegan May 2012 #209

You got stones Brother. bluesbassman May 2012 #213

not really. just his MO. nt seabeyond May 2012 #216

Yep. redqueen May 2012 #223

lol seabeyond May 2012 #225

roflmao DutchLiberal May 2012 #228

After much consideration, the only place where the use of the words "girl" or "girls" bothers me... PassingFair May 2012 #210

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass May 2012 #234

Just don't call me late for dinner. babylonsister May 2012 #221

In context, it's usually pretty obvious if the intent is informality or insult. LeftyMom May 2012 #222

You GO, girl! flvegan May 2012 #255

Was that part of your MO too? LeftyMom May 2012 #263

high five woman..... seabeyond May 2012 #267

I don't need a high five for joking with my boyfriend. But thanks. Or something. LeftyMom May 2012 #269

you are welcome. seabeyond May 2012 #271

Post removed Post removed May 2012 #278

I've got sunshine, on a cloudy day... DutchLiberal May 2012 #226

The Dutchman's not the kind of man.. Mc Mike May 2012 #426

A fascinating thread...I would never use the term to anyone over 14 but I'm a man....Were I female, Rowdyboy May 2012 #227

Is it sexist for me to say I'm broadminded? Bruce Wayne May 2012 #230

Should I be outraged that us guys get jokingly called "The Boys"? Odin2005 May 2012 #239

A lot depends on context varelse May 2012 #249

Just don't call me "ma'am" I hate that. jillan May 2012 #250

I feel the same way with "sir" ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2012 #256

My dad turns around and looks for his father when anybody says Mr. His Last Name. LeftyMom May 2012 #272

AS IF this was an actual problem???? BeHereNow May 2012 #283

Ah yes, one of the most common responses when feminists attempt to discuss redqueen May 2012 #285

Redqueen, HERE is an actual problem, wanna come with some of us to make a difference? BeHereNow May 2012 #297

I've never been to Pine Ridge, but have been to Rosebud and the Black Hills Mc Mike May 2012 #419

+1 hifiguy May 2012 #428

yes. womens issues are often put on the backburner, until they arent. like repug seabeyond May 2012 #429

If pandemics, natural disasters or climate change hifiguy May 2012 #430

again, man, good of you to let us women know what we should be concerned with seabeyond May 2012 #431

It really depends on the circumstances. a la izquierda May 2012 #284

I have found this to be a (mostly) very interesting discussion Seeking Serenity May 2012 #287

I'm reminded of the time Lynette Fromm (attempted assassin of Gerald Ford) Lydia Leftcoast May 2012 #293

interesting.... isnt it? seabeyond May 2012 #294

Yeah, interesting that somebody was upset by the 'belittling' of an assassin. DutchLiberal May 2012 #305

123 certainly is more than THREE people, right? 123 out of 158. seems to me seabeyond May 2012 #308

So you're actually standing up for an assassin? DutchLiberal May 2012 #311

it is good to see you finally admit calling a woman a girl is belittling. i knew you would come to seabeyond May 2012 #312

... and then she says MEN are condescending toward others! DutchLiberal May 2012 #313

you go in every direction, yet still.... you refuse to own up to a couple simple words. wrong. seabeyond May 2012 #314

And this is the SECOND flame-fest you instigated that you may continue all by yourself! DutchLiberal May 2012 #315

why wont you simply acknowledge there are more than three people in all of du that disagree with you seabeyond May 2012 #316

Dutch tv news today referred to a 27 year old assassin as "the boy". DutchLiberal May 2012 #360

Well, that's Dutch Lydia Leftcoast May 2012 #371

I switched to using "women" in college Nikia May 2012 #296

I find that using the terms young men and young women acknowledges the professional Luminous Animal May 2012 #352

that is what i chose. nt seabeyond May 2012 #353

A friend of mine referred to my 22 year old daughter as a "girl" and in the same sentence, Luminous Animal May 2012 #355

I am a guy, so I did not vote. ZombieHorde May 2012 #301

(I'm terrible with time) me too me too. and the more i dont care seabeyond May 2012 #302

Interesting poll. Rex May 2012 #309

I don't have a problem with the term "girl" as long as it's being used by other women. Beacool May 2012 #317

The use of this term drives me crazy. Vinca May 2012 #324

Same - it really annoys me. A subtle way of putting down women TBF May 2012 #327

There are more user names with "girl" in them in the offensive option. FedUpWithIt All May 2012 #332

In group use is vastly different. redqueen May 2012 #333

What you are saying does not bear out in this thread. FedUpWithIt All May 2012 #334

I am SO with you on this. +1000! nt. polly7 May 2012 #342

All about the individual. Society? pff. And apparently 'words have meaning' ONLY redqueen May 2012 #343

Angry? I thought this wasn't about rage. FedUpWithIt All May 2012 #351

LOL, hardly. redqueen May 2012 #354

I'm not interested in the attemps to switch out "their conditioning" for "your conditioning" FedUpWithIt All May 2012 #356

What do you think of another woman telling you that you are "conditioned" & thus should be educated? DutchLiberal May 2012 #370

Apparently i find it offensive. I also find much of what you post offensive. FedUpWithIt All May 2012 #418

why can't people grasp the difference between intragroup usage noiretextatique May 2012 #446

No, it is very simple, you're right. redqueen May 2012 #447

Exactly. lumberjack_jeff May 2012 #415

Language is how we communicate ideas noamnety May 2012 #338

It seems very simple, redqueen May 2012 #339

For me, it's context-driven and situational. Lizzie Poppet May 2012 #346

"Taking offense" at anything is something I don't care about and don't do. Waiting For Everyman May 2012 #349

Goes without saying, the only ones who should be referred as girls, are well nadinbrzezinski May 2012 #363

I usually use the term "women" but always feel like I am making them feel old when I do that Quixote1818 May 2012 #378

"I met a boy" seabeyond May 2012 #393

Blame it on the movie Oklahoma. ;) Quixote1818 May 2012 #379

Here's the t-shirt and the hat Major Nikon May 2012 #392

yes... tell me, why do you want to interfer with women discussing their feelings on an issue seabeyond May 2012 #395

Well, a woman in this thread was told by a feminist that "she had serious self-respect issues" DutchLiberal May 2012 #398

and a 139 women on this thread have said it is offensive when a man uses girl to be condescending seabeyond May 2012 #400

And you seem to be missing that over 40 women polled that it was NOT offensive FedUpWithIt All May 2012 #417

Is there more than one person referring to self worth? redqueen May 2012 #422

Last intrusion from me, red: Mc Mike May 2012 #435

There's not one. That DUer got lucky once redqueen May 2012 #436

The Women's rights post-ers that remain are doing plenty of good posting, though. Mc Mike May 2012 #437

of course i dont forget the 40 or so women that do not have an issue at all with girls. seabeyond May 2012 #423

Why do you want to tell men to just shut up? Major Nikon May 2012 #401

i asked you a question. that would be the opposite of asking you to "shut up". so no.... seabeyond May 2012 #402

You asked me why don't I just shut up Major Nikon May 2012 #404

ah hahah. "I would be admitting my intention was to interfere " and by gosh, you certainly seabeyond May 2012 #405

Ya gotta love people who double down when they've been busted cold Major Nikon May 2012 #406

maybe if men wouldnt be so predictable at doing just that, you know, that old conditioning seabeyond May 2012 #407

It's no more offensive than the term "ladies." eShirl May 2012 #409

Spam deleted by OKNancy (MIR Team) deitzjim May 2012 #434

In a lot of ways, it's a compliment Ter May 2012 #439

It is only a compliment redqueen May 2012 #449

I remember many years ago a guy said this to me: Bryn May 2012 #443

Sounds to me like he was criticizing women who internalized the patriarchy's values. redqueen May 2012 #448

true that, but that is an interesting point. the poster above saying a compliment seabeyond May 2012 #451

btw, more and more men are getting into the poll voting they dont mind being called girl seabeyond May 2012 #452

Sad, isn't it? redqueen May 2012 #453

wink. nt seabeyond May 2012 #454

400 plus posts...let me wade into this epic poll thread. Rex May 2012 #455

Since girlfriend has an analogous term for men, redqueen May 2012 #456

I have a huge problem with the word 'boy'. Rex May 2012 #457

Oh yes, I definitely understand. redqueen May 2012 #458

I am sure you have Rex May 2012 #459

Those are very clear examples of when it is used redqueen May 2012 #460

Yes very degrading and dehumanizing. Rex May 2012 #461

very revealing discussion noiretextatique May 2012 #463

If you start watching for this kind of stuff, redqueen May 2012 #464

I'm positive most adults are fully capable of knowing when a word is being used to insult polly7 May 2012 #465

clearly, many do not "get it" at all noiretextatique May 2012 #469

golden girls? spanone May 2012 #466

#1 Decades ago. #2 That's what they called themselves. nt Honeycombe8 May 2012 #468

Call me anything you like except late for dinner.... MindMover May 2012 #467