Dear Adoptive Parents: The Burden of Adoptee Loyalty

[TexasMommaWithAHat]

37. I agree with you on many issues

especially the use of the term "adoption industry." It is an industry - trading in the commodity of children, which is horrid.

However, "you" have belittled those that have expressed their own realities. Adoptees in this thread who wanted others to know that not everyone shares your experiences.

And while I understand the point of the article, the author's tone towards adoptive parents was dripping with disdain, as I wrote in another response. If you cannot see that, you are far too deep into your own feelings of anger and hate to hear others' experiences, imo. Are their experiences unworthy of validation? Unworthy of being heard?

I have several children - some biological and some through adoption. (I don't give specifics about my life on this board; hence the generalities.) My children who were adopted were in talk therapy for years due to the abuse and neglect of their first home life, so while I come to this topic from a different point of view, I can assure you that adoption is a subject that I have read and researched very much.

Your experience is not unique; there are many just like you. However, there are also many others who don't share your extreme feelings and are indeed leading happy and whole lives, and don't spend their lives focused on their adoption.

I hope you find peace someday. Life is too short to be so bitter.