I am about to become a caregiver again.

[BrotherIvan]

83. I feel for you very much

I took care of my mother who was bedridden by chemo and wanted to die in her home. It took two years. It nearly killed me and I still haven't unraveled all the guilt and grief. But I'm glad I was there. I was with her when she took her last breath. It wasn't peaceful but the pain was over.

The only things I learned was to get as much help as you can and that hospice was the best help and support I could ever have asked for. My mother was afraid to sign onto it, so only consented for the last few months. But it was the best decision for all of us. It opened up so many services and truly helpful, compassionate nurses and doctors. I tell everyone that hospice does not necessarily mean you will die right away as some people live for years after their terminal diagnosis. But if all treatment options have been exhausted, it is truly the absolute best decision for the patient and for the caregivers.

I hope this isn't too hard on you and takes too much out of you. Come and vent and ask for help from whomever you can. My best wishes to you.