*** My gofundme Page ***

[TorchTheWitch]

94. at this point things couldn't be worse

I got wrong information from the court about when I'd have to pay the next full month of rent. I had thought that after I pay this $850 that's due by Friday that I'd then have 30 days to work like crazy and stock up as much money as I could and get out of here even if it's just some tiny place where I can have Yoshi and at least my most vital stuff (maybe store the rest of my stuff somewhere or something like that). I wouldn't even care if it was in a crappy neighborhood as long as it wasn't too far from the city since that's where I'd be most likely to do any kind of work whether the catering bartending or a temp office job or whatever.

But I just found out recently that the countdown for that 30 days started on April 6th the day I filed the appeal and that I have to pay a full month's rent by May 6th or that's it for the appeal and in 10-15 days the constable comes to throw me out! So, after paying this $850 on Friday which I have thanks to you folks that donated to the gofundme page I'll have just a few hundred dollars left to my name and only about 10 days before I'd have to pay $1250 to the court! Now I can't figure out what the hell filing as a pauper did for me other than let me file the appeal at all. I'm not any less of a pauper than I was when I filed the appeal, and I can't figure out how anyone that normally lives from paycheck to paycheck could possibly come up with all that money that fast.

Meanwhile after I filed the appeal and had these 20 days to otherwise try to find government help, charities, work or whatever to help me keep a roof over my head, Yoshi and at least my most important stuff one of my brother's got in touch with me to try to help with the government stuff since I was hitting a really frustrating wall with that. Just trying to get someone on the phone at all is a hair pulling nightmare. You get stuck in a runaround of automated phone crap that's just maddening. My brother even said it drove him batty. Then I get a call from him, and he told me that he talked to someone at his gym that works at one of these agencies in my county (you have to go through the agencies in the county that you live in - no other county will so much as talk to you if you aren't a resident). She worked at some place called NHS that I'd not heard of before, but when I looked them up on the internet I couldn't imagine how in the world they could do anything for me since they work with almost exclusively people that are alcoholics or drug addicts, but also work with some people that have brain injuries or autism or some other serious mental health problems.

I'll have to go into the nightmare with the government agencies later because I just have to go to bed now as tomorrow I have sooooo much to do and have to be up really early. But thanks so much for asking me and Yoshi. He's doing as good as ever, but right now after getting completely jerked around by these useless agencies wasting my time that was far better spent elsewhere and now finding out that I have to pay a months rent by May 6th, I'm just not seeing any way to keep a roof over our heads. I'm so damn scared that I'm going to lose him! I have to struggle not to cry and just curl up in the fetal position and give up at this point since I can't think of a bloody thing I've not already done. even if I got a job a week ago and worked every hour God made to pay the damn court after what I have to give them on Friday there's just no way I could come up with that amount of money even if I gave up food and toilet paper (and I'm very nearly out of both).

I also just found out from gofundme that my page still hasn't been approved to be listed as a searchable page so the only people that can find it even now are anyone I've given the direct link to. They said I had to change or delete one of the photos and I sent them an email asking which one, and they've not gotten back to me yet. They also say that most donations come from networking through people that you already know. Great.

I'm so sorry I have nothing good to report. It's all terrible. And now I REALLY need to get to bed, so I'll have to get back to this when I can scrounge some time. Thanks again for asking about me and Yoshi. Jesus, I can't lose him!