I'm going to be homeless

[daredtowork]

68. Could I propose something before you jump to that conclusion?

A lot of Torch's harassed experience and inability to get things done ring true to me from my own experience.

I'd like to suggest why she keeps dancing away when people get too pushy is not because she's trying to pull some sort of "fast one" but because she's afraid if someone comes in and starts laying down "tough love" they will demand that she make changes she is trying to avoid making (like giving up the dog) or they will start impinging on her autonomy in various ways. The woman who wrote the famous "why poor people make bad decisions" article buys cigarettes and smokes and seems to feel that's an important choice and "break" she needs to have. But if any outsider swooped in to "judge", those cigs would be the first thing taken away.

This is why elderly people are often afraid of their own children when they get to be a certain age (they might "get sent to a home&quot . A neighbor of mine was telling me about having to move a friend of theirs out of a place "she couldn't afford" which meant forcing her to "give up a lot of her books". Having heard that, I'm not about to trust her with my own housing problems! There are certain choices that involve home and identity that we don't want to make unless absolutely, absolutely forced to do it.

If this is the reason, Torch the Witch did lose vital credibility through avoidance. (And before anyone piles on me, I'm saying that because I'm concerned TtW couldn't raise as much GoFundMe money as she could have because her disappearances raised those questions. I've strongly suggested to her to bite the bullet and *request* a Third Party from DU to come visit her and vouch for her situation as a third party. Preferably an older member with some credibility.

I would really like to know if this plan is in process.

In the meantime, *please* don't make assumptions about how many crappy little things people in these sorts of situations have to get done each day. My organized looks like I'm being scheduled by the Helicopter Mom From Hell. Even if TtW was applying for jobs, do you think she'd be in any condition to appeal to an employer? If you don't want to help her - fine. But leave some benefit of the doubt that you may not be able to comprehend the scale of fragmentation imposed by situations of imminent homelessness, unemployment, and depression over lack of prospects.