General Discussion

shadowmayor

(1,325 posts)

93. The Stars at Night . . .

Fri May 8, 2015, 07:48 PM

May 2015

Sir William,

I tell folks that I live in El Paso - NOT Texas. If you don't know the difference folks, ask Zippy. There's a hatchery somewhere's outside of Waco where we inbreed 'em by the score. We thought Shrub was remarkably terrible, and then saw Perry elected again and again and again. Now we have Guber Louie prayin' that the Mooslim Prezdint doesn't capture Tejas! Farenthold, Barton, Poe, Sessions - the list goes on and on. And in the Senate we give you the USA - Cornyn and Cruz - you're absolutely welcome! Yessireebob and jaysus feckin' keeriiistonacrutch we have some stoopid people in this country. But when it comes to the truly stupid, you'd be hard pressed to beat our great state of Texas.

And if you don't think that weather and atmospheric events have global connections (like ENSO) just remember that if you let a little bit of air out of a few footballs in New England, people in Dallas start crying!

The Shadow Mayor

Edit history

Please sign in to view edit histories.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

135 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

Jesus Jumped-Up Great Googly-Moogly Sarsaparilla CHRIST [View all] WilliamPitt May 2015 OP

Caesar had a dog? eridani May 2015 #1

Negris Alto Person 2713 May 2015 #101

If something like that is known, someone on DU will know it eridani May 2015 #106

Who is Zippy? KoKo May 2015 #2

Here LiberalEsto May 2015 #7

Zippy is a Zen master even though he doesn't know it. nt hifiguy May 2015 #20

+1 Enthusiast May 2015 #36

Aw.. Yeah� Practice your Zippyisms HERE... MrMickeysMom May 2015 #117

Thanks...I remember a DU'er who used that as his/her Sig Line or Avatar.... KoKo May 2015 #77

And I STILL think Loni Anderson's hair should be legalized! nt Buns_of_Fire May 2015 #107

Here you go . Enjoy -- HappyMe May 2015 #12

Are you poking fun of us old timers that know who Zippy is?? rhett o rick May 2015 #51

I'm an "Old Timer" myself...but, had no idea what his post was about... KoKo May 2015 #68

If that doesn't freak people out nothing will...... think May 2015 #3

The longer I live, the less surprises me. (We're talking bottom feeder here.) Gregorian May 2015 #4

you know what's worse? reddread May 2015 #5

Are you kidding me!? We have General Abbott about to promote Chuck Norris Rex May 2015 #6

But the world needs Obamaphones. Gregorian May 2015 #16

Bernie Bluetooth forced implants. Just throwing that out there... Rex May 2015 #21

Fie and bosh! hifiguy May 2015 #18

Norris is not amused by your words... Rex May 2015 #26

Bruce won. hifiguy May 2015 #29

That is only because The Norris had not developed his beard fist technique yet. Rex May 2015 #32

Lee made one terrible mistake... JHB May 2015 #62

Ridiculous! Bruce Lee is dead. There's an old martial arts saying: "Death really slows you down." tclambert May 2015 #79

only because of the Universal Law, and old bromide: BlancheSplanchnik May 2015 #88

As Groucho said, the good die young hifiguy May 2015 #125

THAAAAT'S where the original quote's from.... BlancheSplanchnik May 2015 #130

DU is like an ongoing seminar. hifiguy May 2015 #131

that's not only the truth,.... BlancheSplanchnik May 2015 #134

+1 for Bruce. historylovr May 2015 #111

If you have his brand of confidence that your party and their backers Snotcicles May 2015 #8

But isn't someone who learned by his mistakes... fadedrose May 2015 #9

Good point! Let's get W back in the saddle (with Smirky on whip.) erronis May 2015 #64

As long as its not a real saddle on a real horse. Could be tricky. maddiemom May 2015 #122

Yeah... kentuck May 2015 #10

But,..but.. Segami May 2015 #11

Interesting picture... Thespian2 May 2015 #47

Wealth, Power & Control at all costs.. Segami May 2015 #100

W's motto: LiberalEsto May 2015 #13

That should be the repuke campaign slogan. hifiguy May 2015 #50

tacitly, it is. BlancheSplanchnik May 2015 #94

LOL! HappyMe May 2015 #14

Amazing, isn't it. hifiguy May 2015 #15

Dude could fuck up the recipe for tapwater WilliamPitt May 2015 #17

"A left-handed football bat of a man!" Mopar151 May 2015 #116

Will, that was a very entertaining rant, but you're wrong. Martin Eden May 2015 #19

I'd bet a third of the people who voted for Chimpy in 2000 hifiguy May 2015 #22

I actually have quite a lot of Republican friends WilliamPitt May 2015 #24

Selective relationships - I hate to say it. erronis May 2015 #66

I know a lot of middle-aged white men, many of whom are "conservative" Martin Eden May 2015 #89

How true. mnhtnbb May 2015 #27

this alone should disqualify jeb from even a guided tour of the white house spanone May 2015 #23

"Jeb, look, there's the White House! Now go play in some traffic." WilliamPitt May 2015 #25

Among the passengers on that clown bus known as the Republican party, sarge43 May 2015 #28

I'd add my favorite new one-liner, stolen this week from the Rude Pundit: calimary May 2015 #30

Oh fuck no. NuclearDem May 2015 #31

His mama made him say that. eom japple May 2015 #33

Sweet mother of god MissDeeds May 2015 #34

They don't think they made any mistakes FiveGoodMen May 2015 #37

True MissDeeds May 2015 #40

Well, exactly. Were they censured? Were they jailed? Fined? Run out of town? Nope. nt Nay May 2015 #110

If we could turn America's natural stupidity reserves into clean energy hifiguy May 2015 #44

Ha! I love it! MissDeeds May 2015 #49

The mind no longer boggles tularetom May 2015 #35

given the shenanigans of blackwell, etc., can't even say he won the vote niyad May 2015 #42

How can people not see just how we are being manipulated. At one time the Republicon Party rhett o rick May 2015 #38

And everything that Bernie is saying now could have been lifted hifiguy May 2015 #46

True... KoKo May 2015 #73

Yep. Like climate change, we've probably Ilsa May 2015 #114

Even if we haven't passed the point of no return via nature, we have pasted the point rhett o rick May 2015 #115

I might have to borrow that post title. CharlotteVale May 2015 #39

Lord, no! Enthusiast May 2015 #41

Which reveals much about Jeb's fans. chknltl May 2015 #43

If it were petrol, it wouldn't power a gnat's motorcycle hifiguy May 2015 #48

I love it when you rail against Republicans n/t OKNancy May 2015 #45

If there is anything better than a truly righteous Will Pitt rant ... 11 Bravo May 2015 #52

Excellent! WilliamPitt Thespian2 May 2015 #53

Nothing gets my back up quicker than the mere mention WilliamPitt May 2015 #55

Don't hold back, Will Maynar May 2015 #129

After some consideration, I have to come to the aid of George Bush Gregorian May 2015 #54

+1000 heaven05 May 2015 #56

Gog and Magog libodem May 2015 #57

Like Godot, Jebus ain't showin'. nt hifiguy May 2015 #58

LOLOLOL libodem May 2015 #59

Zippy The Pinhead for Defense Secretary KamaAina May 2015 #60

Jeb COULD appoint W as Defense Secretary grasswire May 2015 #97

zOMFG! KamaAina May 2015 #99

It is offensive to take the Lord's name in vain in that way oberliner May 2015 #61

No. WilliamPitt May 2015 #67

Can't blame you for saying no oberliner May 2015 #81

Lest we emphasize that folks should Ilsa May 2015 #112

As hurtful and insulting as a fake and gratuitous cartoon contest intended and promoted to be hurtful and insulting to another Fred Sanders May 2015 #74

As hurtful and insulting as the cartoon that won the award in that contest oberliner May 2015 #80

I think the Lord has bigger fish to fry The Velveteen Ocelot May 2015 #85

OFFS L0oniX May 2015 #127

Yes malaise May 2015 #63

Is u okay? Do you need some water? shenmue May 2015 #65

It seems he has backpeddled on having an indepent foreign Agnosticsherbet May 2015 #69

Poor Jesus Aerows May 2015 #70

Immortality has its benefits WilliamPitt May 2015 #71

It's true Aerows May 2015 #72

Yeah, cause he has what they call 'sperience. mountain grammy May 2015 #75

You are the absolute Master of Instructive Hyperbole. trof May 2015 #76

To infinity and beyond! Stardust May 2015 #109

Is the Highper-bowl hifiguy May 2015 #119

Best rant ever! n/t Paper Roses May 2015 #78

In a sane country... nikto May 2015 #82

And here everybody always said Jeb was the smart one. The Velveteen Ocelot May 2015 #83

This is what republican strategy looks like... Agony May 2015 #84

What you say is true. But then putting Clinton 'corruption' front and center as a problem is kind of stupid when Fred Sanders May 2015 #86

I had to stop and think� which "entire party" are you referring to... Agony May 2015 #87

The tragic part is that was a *smart answer*. Marr May 2015 #90

Jeb won't attack Neptune, he'd attack Uranus... longship May 2015 #91

I haven't seen a flame/rant this good since my days on Usenet! GliderGuider May 2015 #92

The Stars at Night . . . shadowmayor May 2015 #93

BRILLIANT grasswire May 2015 #95

A pol with even lousier political instincts than poppy, ucrdem May 2015 #96

I'd appoint Bush as an advisor. JoeyT May 2015 #98

For real Tracyjo May 2015 #102

That thing about Jesus could be considered a blasphemous insult to someone's Deity. Warren DeMontague May 2015 #103

Choosing George W. Bush as an adviser on foreign policy is like..... DFW May 2015 #104

That is an excellent analoty. hifiguy May 2015 #128

I'm sure there are better ones DFW May 2015 #132

The vivid absurdity of that one will not be easy to top. hifiguy May 2015 #133

WilliamPitt, try to see the positive side. Yorktown May 2015 #105

I'm thinking those beautiful blonde girls might have rifles in their hands fighting off polly7 May 2015 #108

Freaking awesome rant. Did you write one after Jebby Ilsa May 2015 #113

I just can't even, either. 3catwoman3 May 2015 #118

Oh lordie!! That was fun to read. Thanks! Hiraeth May 2015 #120

Would that be Dubya's advice on: "one of the keys to being seen as a great leader is to be seen as maddiemom May 2015 #121

Since you referenced Zippy the Pinhead chapdrum May 2015 #123

^^^ For the Win ^^^ WilliamPitt May 2015 #124

Satan would make a better foreign policy adviser to Jeb. No offense meant to Satan. L0oniX May 2015 #126

Hey Will.... sdfernando May 2015 #135