selfdelete

[Kalidurga]

26. In a weird way you could say my family was an iceberg family too.

Except our family was so dysfunctional it was noticeable. There was no covering that amount of crazy. However, despite that whatever was apparent was 100x worse behind closed doors. For example most people wouldn't have guessed about the physical abuse even though they could guess at neglect. The neglect was just too obvious to miss so guess at isn't really the right term, they could see the neglect, but not the physical abuse. I don't have any personal memories of sexual abuse. I have a vague feeling that nags at me based on a dream maybe. However, what stands out to me is that my parents were friends with at least one family where incest was multi generational. And I am almost certain another family they were friends with sexually abused children, I don't know which children or if they were related. Those are the two families we visited the most, but there were others that made me very very uncomfortable. I made myself scarce no matter who we were visiting, I pretty much didn't trust anyone ever. I also made myself scarce when we had company, the adults were not pleased.

Two of my sisters were molested when they were in foster care by the their foster father who was a pastor. My parents did nothing when they found out and they did know who he was and what church he was a pastor at. I would have gone to the church and marched up to the podium and yelled what he did into the microphone. And then I would call the police. I am not one of those afraid to start a scene people. My parents did nothing when one of the kids (he was at least 16) tried to molest my 9 year old sister. I threatened to kill him with a baseball bat, because I walked in on his attempted rape.

This shit is pissing me off to no end, iceberg or not.