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TexasProgresive

(12,728 posts)

117. Not really; and why is no one recing this great thread?

Fri Jun 12, 2015, 07:49 AM

Jun 2015

My high school years I lived in a neighborhood that was a combination of elderly people and a kind of artsy crowd. I knew about gay people but I wasn't aware that I knew any and one was a great friend. He was fighting admitting he was homosexual - you know the shtick - dating girls, making out and maybe a little groping. He came out around our junior year of college. He lives in Australia now.

I can understand his fear at coming to terms with his homosexuality. Boys I went to high school with would brag about going to Westheimer (in Houston, TX) and "roll queers". For those who don't know what that means they would assault them and take their money. The men would fear reporting it to the police because they would get worst treatment from them, plus jail time. This was prior to the S.C. striking down the Texas anti-sodomy law.

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Did you hate, fear or dislike gay people at one time? [View all] xfundy Jun 2015 OP

Nope, they're people just like me. I don't care who people love. onecaliberal Jun 2015 #1

"People?" Not to some people. xfundy Jun 2015 #7

No I'm not younger. I'm a 48 year old white bleeding heart liberal woman. onecaliberal Jun 2015 #16

If you have men in your life, how do you think they'd respond? xfundy Jun 2015 #24

Been married to a man for 29 years and have 2 sons. onecaliberal Jun 2015 #32

Did you witness any homophobic behavior or influences in their lives? xfundy Jun 2015 #63

No, I've never seen a hint from any of them... onecaliberal Jun 2015 #176

I guess you'd say I was casually homophobic in HS and college Ex Lurker Jun 2015 #57

Chances are that they won't be gay. xfundy Jun 2015 #91

Why would I do something like that? They're all people. shraby Jun 2015 #2

I suffered from some pretty severe internalized homophobia... Agschmid Jun 2015 #3

Am I wrong in assuming you're gay, then? xfundy Jun 2015 #8

I'm *Wicked* Gay Agschmid Jun 2015 #9

Yay! xfundy Jun 2015 #12

I think so... Agschmid Jun 2015 #15

That happened to be (being outed) a couple of times xfundy Jun 2015 #26

Right with you there, Agschmid Aerows Jun 2015 #25

No...was I expected to? brooklynite Jun 2015 #4

My childhood was allllll about conforming. xfundy Jun 2015 #78

Where I grew up, you were most definitely expected to be homophobic. closeupready Jun 2015 #162

You don't understand... brooklynite Jun 2015 #166

Ah okay. Good for you. closeupready Jun 2015 #168

nope. knew and loved LGBT relatives and family friends from the time I was a little kid cali Jun 2015 #5

Are you a younger person? xfundy Jun 2015 #19

not at all. I'm 61. cali Jun 2015 #22

WOW. Isherwood is one of my favorite authors. xfundy Jun 2015 #29

they were relatively free to be themselves, I think cali Jun 2015 #112

Wow, that is fascinating, Cali (as many probably tell you). closeupready Jun 2015 #167

no, not Hemingway cali Jun 2015 #175

General antipathy, I suppose gratuitous Jun 2015 #6

Did you ever get icked out or afraid one of them would come on to you? xfundy Jun 2015 #11

Some icking out in my mid-teens gratuitous Jun 2015 #46

Never, so can't help you with your compilation. (n/t) WorseBeforeBetter Jun 2015 #10

This is good. I expect you are a millenial? xfundy Jun 2015 #13

Far from it! WorseBeforeBetter Jun 2015 #35

Oh, no. Sunday morning and evening, wednesday night xfundy Jun 2015 #54

Ah. WorseBeforeBetter Jun 2015 #75

MD or VA? xfundy Jun 2015 #81

Yes, we are alright. ;-) WorseBeforeBetter Jun 2015 #83

Aren't Methodists great? Blue_In_AK Jun 2015 #100

I'm with ya all the way. WorseBeforeBetter Jun 2015 #216

Yup. It doesn't make it any better but it wasn't so much hatred, I found the whole idea humorous. brewens Jun 2015 #14

I don't know why lots of guys can't just accept the compliment xfundy Jun 2015 #23

They should look at it as less competition for women shouldn't they? WTF is there about that to brewens Jun 2015 #33

I guess they feel a need to 'prove' they're not gay. xfundy Jun 2015 #37

One thing I've learned when discussing gay issues with gay people. Don't say, "I'm not gay brewens Jun 2015 #70

Exactly. It's not like it's an insult. xfundy Jun 2015 #123

That's what I always thought as a kid! jberryhill Jun 2015 #38

Nope, but I had to fight against the phobia many had over AIDS nadinbrzezinski Jun 2015 #17

Exactly. xfundy Jun 2015 #20

Moving out of North Dakota did it for me. nt geek tragedy Jun 2015 #18

Geez, I bet. xfundy Jun 2015 #21

I'm not gay. Moved to Minneapolis for college. geek tragedy Jun 2015 #118

Rural or city? uppityperson Jun 2015 #195

City. Bis-Man. nt geek tragedy Jun 2015 #198

Thanks. It's fun looking back, seeing who bailed when, where they are now and who, how, they are uppityperson Jun 2015 #200

No, I don't believe I ever did. stage left Jun 2015 #27

Nope. I remember my grandmother had a gay friend. His name was Mike. notadmblnd Jun 2015 #28

OK, are YOU younger? xfundy Jun 2015 #31

I'm 56. this was back in the 70's when Dodge Chargers were really cool! notadmblnd Jun 2015 #119

I'm your age xfundy Jun 2015 #136

Maybe. My grandma was a hell raising liberal. Was your mom? notadmblnd Jun 2015 #183

Oh, no. Quite the opposite. xfundy Jun 2015 #194

Oh, I'm so sorry. I can imagine, in fact I know. notadmblnd Jun 2015 #214

No madokie Jun 2015 #30

Was there any animosity toward your friend that you witnessed? xfundy Jun 2015 #34

Pretty much still closeted madokie Jun 2015 #77

I thought those things were strange jberryhill Jun 2015 #36

The epithet being "F*G lover?" Or similar? xfundy Jun 2015 #43

No, just straight up f*** jberryhill Jun 2015 #62

I remember several incidents TlalocW Jun 2015 #39

I should also add TlalocW Jun 2015 #49

This is encouraging. xfundy Jun 2015 #64

No, thanks to my mom ... NanceGreggs Jun 2015 #40

Should have been that simple for everyone xfundy Jun 2015 #139

No....... Grey Jun 2015 #41

Yup Egnever Jun 2015 #42

Thank you. xfundy Jun 2015 #50

Well that was certainly the start Egnever Jun 2015 #177

You will get a ton of responses from people who were pure as the driven snow from the Luminous Animal Jun 2015 #44

You may be right. xfundy Jun 2015 #59

Or just very closeted areas. Erich Bloodaxe BSN Jun 2015 #130

Lots of money has been made xfundy Jun 2015 #141

I ran into Diane Duane books in my tween years Erich Bloodaxe BSN Jun 2015 #147

That's the way it goes Scootaloo Jun 2015 #60

my response was genuine Skittles Jun 2015 #101

Damn romanic Jun 2015 #106

Not 'hating, disliking or fearing' gays is not 'pure as the driven snow'. Erich Bloodaxe BSN Jun 2015 #132

I don't think I did sakabatou Jun 2015 #45

No. My family was gay friendly Hollywood. hunter Jun 2015 #47

My family was gay-friendly Midwest Karia Jun 2015 #210

always supported gays JI7 Jun 2015 #48

I can never remember hating or fearing or disliking gay people Skittles Jun 2015 #51

I was taught to hate black people and be suspicious of Jews. xfundy Jun 2015 #89

I was a GI brat Skittles Jun 2015 #95

i had a similar background shanti Jun 2015 #182

I absolutely agree Skittles Jun 2015 #215

As a kid, my one grandmother was casually racist in her language Erich Bloodaxe BSN Jun 2015 #131

I don't remember if I was explicitly taught to hate black people. stage left Jun 2015 #185

No. LWolf Jun 2015 #52

When I was a young teenager, I used the term as an insult Scootaloo Jun 2015 #53

Me too. xfundy Jun 2015 #56

Yeah, this is close to my experience too cemaphonic Jun 2015 #88

No. Rex Jun 2015 #55

No. Starry Messenger Jun 2015 #58

Yes. I feared them. lovemydog Jun 2015 #61

Fantastic. Thanks for your input. xfundy Jun 2015 #68

I think I figured it out by Sophomore year rufus dog Jun 2015 #65

No. moondust Jun 2015 #66

When I was a teen just learning about sexuality in the 1960s I didn't know any gay people aint_no_life_nowhere Jun 2015 #67

This message was self-deleted by its author LostOne4Ever Jun 2015 #69

Thanks to everyone for the great input! xfundy Jun 2015 #71

Never, I accept everyone as they are! akbacchus_BC Jun 2015 #72

No but I was very lucky to have a very ahead of the times family in the 50s olddots Jun 2015 #73

Do you recall any consternation over Christine Jorgensen? xfundy Jun 2015 #76

Hate, fear or dislike at one time? jberryhill Jun 2015 #74

Never had any negative thoughts about gay folks gwheezie Jun 2015 #79

I don't think so. calimary Jun 2015 #80

I honestly do not remember how I came riversedge Jun 2015 #82

First one I knew in rl was my cousin. Erich Bloodaxe BSN Jun 2015 #135

I dealt with some pretty bad internalized homophobia when I was about 14 or 15. DemocraticWing Jun 2015 #84

Hopefully you came to accept yourself as you are. xfundy Jun 2015 #103

Once I got to college I realized I could pick and choose my company, and be myself. DemocraticWing Jun 2015 #122

I have never hated, feared, or disliked gay people. SamKnause Jun 2015 #85

No, I never hated, feared or disliked them, but as a teenager it was a major cutdown to call someone Ghost in the Machine Jun 2015 #86

Was that you? xfundy Jun 2015 #90

Nope. I came from a tolerant family and.. mvd Jun 2015 #87

There was a time when I just didn't get it. undeterred Jun 2015 #92

Exactly. xfundy Jun 2015 #93

Yes, that was what was taught. PeteSelman Jun 2015 #94

Nope, never in my life. CBGLuthier Jun 2015 #96

Knowledge: Homosexuals and pedophiles are not the same thing. Gay people patricia92243 Jun 2015 #97

Plenty of DUers disliked gay people Prism Jun 2015 #98

Can you elaborate? xfundy Jun 2015 #102

The Great Gay Purge of 2009 bananas Jun 2015 #105

Wow. Thanks. lovemydog Jun 2015 #111

+7 Jamastiene Jun 2015 #125

I never feared, hated or disliked gay people. Blue_In_AK Jun 2015 #99

I just never had any fear/hate/dislike. I was born not caring. JDPriestly Jun 2015 #104

That comment about high school romanic Jun 2015 #107

Yes I did dislike it: at least in myself. Betty Karlson Jun 2015 #108

Never, but then I always knew I was straight. B Calm Jun 2015 #109

I bought into the stereotypes as I was growing up and definitely saw them as "other." Brickbat Jun 2015 #110

No. In fact, I never really thought about it. Vinca Jun 2015 #113

I remember being a bit uncomfortable about the idea when I was in high school gollygee Jun 2015 #114

No, Never ProfessorGAC Jun 2015 #115

None of the above MoonRiver Jun 2015 #116

Not really; and why is no one recing this great thread? TexasProgresive Jun 2015 #117

Lots of lgbt's are still afraid to report crimes against them to police. xfundy Jun 2015 #121

You don't have to be gay to be afraid of reporting crimes. Erich Bloodaxe BSN Jun 2015 #144

I hear you TexasProgresive Jun 2015 #153

No. Next question. n/t AngryOldDem Jun 2015 #120

When I was young and first became aware, I thought it was strange. bemildred Jun 2015 #124

If you don't mind, I'd like to say that your post pretty much sums up my life experiance... BlueJazz Jun 2015 #128

Can't say I ever did, although Erich Bloodaxe BSN Jun 2015 #126

Nope, although I confess to thinking it was funny TexasBushwhacker Jun 2015 #127

I thought his name was Marshall Applewhite. xfundy Jun 2015 #133

He went by Herff at the time TexasBushwhacker Jun 2015 #170

Religion, when mixed with self-hatred, is quite volatile. xfundy Jun 2015 #172

No, while young I married a gay man and lived with him and his life partner for almost 10 years KittyWampus Jun 2015 #129

Wow. xfundy Jun 2015 #134

I knew they were a gay couple. There was a specific legal reason for what we did... KittyWampus Jun 2015 #138

Really interesting OP. Agschmid Jun 2015 #137

Thanks. xfundy Jun 2015 #151

Not hate but as a kid Freddie Mercury was something new to me underpants Jun 2015 #140

Ha! I recall my friends arguing that xfundy Jun 2015 #145

No not raised that way . Had gay friends of both sexes in HS. My mom was friends with a gay Person 2713 Jun 2015 #142

i have always been, and remain, completely baffled by anti-gay prejudice unblock Jun 2015 #143

You should try rice vinegar. It's GOOOOOOD. xfundy Jun 2015 #150

Can't help you. qwlauren35 Jun 2015 #146

Thank you! xfundy Jun 2015 #152

You might want to read the edited version. qwlauren35 Jun 2015 #156

No. Knew gay people, TexasMommaWithAHat Jun 2015 #148

I never "hated, feared or disliked" ... Whiskeytide Jun 2015 #149

Thank YOU for participating. xfundy Jun 2015 #154

I think sometimes ... Whiskeytide Jun 2015 #158

What he said jberryhill Jun 2015 #204

Yes, I was a supporter of "pray the gay away" :-( Bradical79 Jun 2015 #155

I had an uncle who was gay and died when I was in college of AIDS davidpdx Jun 2015 #157

Nope, Never Thought Much RobinA Jun 2015 #159

I'm kind of slow so I didn't figure out until later that some of my mother's friends were gay Fumesucker Jun 2015 #160

Nope. leftyladyfrommo Jun 2015 #161

I was blessed with a liberal upbringing, so pretty much accept people as they are Doctor_J Jun 2015 #163

No. The concept of gay marriage took a little getting-used-to, but not for long. (nt) Paladin Jun 2015 #164

No, but I was unaware treestar Jun 2015 #165

No hatred, but I did make a lot of insensitive and bigoted comments when I was younger. Throd Jun 2015 #169

I don't think I hated them, feared them or disliked them, but... hamsterjill Jun 2015 #171

I grew up watching kids in the hall, evirus Jun 2015 #173

Hadn't even considered that! xfundy Jun 2015 #174

No, but then again I wasn�t honestly aware of people being attracted to their own sex... dorkzilla Jun 2015 #178

Sadly, some still think they or their kids can "catch it" xfundy Jun 2015 #187

Terrible what harm religion can do dorkzilla Jun 2015 #197

I unknowingly married a man who was gay but was trying to 'do the right thing'. Avalux Jun 2015 #179

I came very close to entering a marriage like that. xfundy Jun 2015 #188

Of course I did. I grew up in rural PA and I was a dumbass who believed what others told me LynneSin Jun 2015 #180

Wonderful story. xfundy Jun 2015 #191

Sadly yes IVoteDFL Jun 2015 #181

Excellent. xfundy Jun 2015 #193

Honestly, no, but they were invisible to me for much of my childhood.... Humanist_Activist Jun 2015 #184

No....was/am I supposed to? ileus Jun 2015 #186

When people here object that I assume someone is gay, closeupready Jun 2015 #189

No, never hate, fear or dislike ... but I did NOT pay enough attention .... etherealtruth Jun 2015 #190

I don't think I ever had any of those feelings. But then I was raised by parents who did not waste jwirr Jun 2015 #192

Never once LittleBlue Jun 2015 #196

I do not remember being aware of differences as a child, my folks were very accepting of all people uppityperson Jun 2015 #199

I lived with a lesbian part of the time I was in school. xfundy Jun 2015 #202

In high school, I would use the term "gay" to describe things that were not to Ed Suspicious Jun 2015 #201

I had an uncle, who was gay, maybe two liberal N proud Jun 2015 #203

"maybe he'll find the right girl." xfundy Jun 2015 #205

Nope. Never did. peacebird Jun 2015 #206

As a kid in the 70s, I didn't know what "gay" meant until I was about ten. Arugula Latte Jun 2015 #207

Nope. Always disliked bigots. we can do it Jun 2015 #208

No, never, wasn't raised that way. Yo_Mama Jun 2015 #209

I grew up in Miami, FL, which has many gay people, so it never bothered me. RebelOne Jun 2015 #211

I grew up in Greenwich Village HockeyMom Jun 2015 #212

Learned to make disparraging comments before I knew what they meant. One_Life_To_Give Jun 2015 #213

I went to a fundie church at one point. Initech Jun 2015 #217

My first boyfriend was gay. After he came out we remained dear friends. nolabear Jun 2015 #218