Why do evangelicals have a compulsive need to believe God controls everything

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13. NFL Star Thanks Jesus After Successful Double Homicide

CHARLESTON, SC–Washington Redskins defensive end D'Aundré Banks gave "all thanks and praise to my personal Lord and Savior Jesus Christ" Monday for giving him the strength he needed to fatally stab bouncer Isaac Edmonds and ex-girlfriend Pamela Hamilton outside a Charleston nightclub early Sunday morning.

All glory to Jesus," the 25-year-old Banks, who attended the University of South Carolina, told reporters from his cell in the Charleston County Jail. "He is with me in this dark hour, as He was in our devastating 14-13 playoff loss to the Buccaneers. His love will see me through this."

According to police reports, at approximately 2:30 a.m., a visibly intoxicated Banks became involved in an altercation with Edmonds regarding who would accompany Hamilton home. When Edmonds attempted to restrain Banks, the 288-pound devout Christian produced a knife and stabbed Edmonds and Hamilton repeatedly. He then fled to the home of girlfriend and Hooters waitress Lisa Nolan in nearby Summerville, where police arrested him several hours later.

"First off, I'd like to say 'great job' to Isaac and Pamela, who put up a heck of a fight and have nothing to be ashamed of," Banks said. "They were terrific opponents, and it's too bad somebody had to lose a life. But the Lord Jesus Christ was truly with me Saturday night. He guided my hand when I was able to make that big hit on Isaac, and I really felt His presence when I stepped up and made that great slashing cut to bring Pamela down from behind."

Added Banks: "Jesus really let me take this homicide to the next level. Thank you, Jesus!"

EDIT

http://www.theonion.com/article/nfl-star-thanks-jesus-after-successful-double-homi-428