General Discussion

kjones

(1,059 posts)

148. If people followed "I got mine, now I'm done." We would never get anywhere.

Thu Jul 9, 2015, 01:18 PM

Jul 2015

I mean, as a white, straight, monogamous individual, "resting on my laurels"
would have left me content that I could marry my black girlfriend. I could have
done so at any time, but friends and strangers were denied the same
rights, so I didn't. I don't intend to wash my hands of the LGBT community-
now that SSM is the law of the land- in some sort of "Mission Accomplished"
moment. And while the only poly individuals I know, I don't really know well,
I don't intend to wash my hands of them either.

In fact, I intend to keep my hands quite dirty until the law of the land
is that any union of love and consent is fair play.

To be clear, people can celebrate, rest, make base camp, enjoy those
well deserved freedoms etc, etc. It's fine! It's expected! If I had a
same sex partner I was finally able to marry, our celebration would probably
be much longer than a week.
So don't worry, there will be plenty of justice to fight for when you're
ready to head back into the breach. Some of us don't need to
enjoy our new found freedoms though, because we didn't get any, either
because we already had them or don't yet, and we are still on the
march.

There will be plenty of justice of all types to fight for in the future.
No one should be criticized for making the best of present victories though,
nor should anyone be criticized for remembering what is yet to come.
To do so is to pretend it is a zero-sum game, and that just crazy.

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Gay Marriage - Can we have *one* week [View all] Aerows Jul 2015 OP

No you cant because they HATE you that much. Sorry, not here, not in judeo christian America randys1 Jul 2015 #1

Really though. bravenak Jul 2015 #2

Bravenak said it. cwydro Jul 2015 #37

She's a good friend Aerows Jul 2015 #60

Yup. I have strong opinions on the poly thing, but it is inappropriate to raise them now IMHO. stevenleser Jul 2015 #150

It isn't that it is inappropriate to raise them now Aerows Jul 2015 #155

For some it is, for others it isn't. n/t Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #157

A band of merry pranksters yelling "Look at MEEEE!" is not helpful or kind.... Hekate Jul 2015 #159

It isn't the timing, it is the intent. I agree with Aerows, she is absolutely correct. sabrina 1 Jul 2015 #165

I agree with you and with Aerows. BeanMusical Jul 2015 #190

Bullshit is their default position. blm Jul 2015 #160

Ain't god's country great, so fucken loving, so kind, NOT. n/t RKP5637 Jul 2015 #3

I don't know Aerows Jul 2015 #5

I've been attacked a couple of times, but fortunately not hurt. I have another friend, super RKP5637 Jul 2015 #9

And then to see this victory get diminished Aerows Jul 2015 #16

I liken it to the civil rights era. There is still so much endless hostility and hatred in this RKP5637 Jul 2015 #28

So sorry to hear this... awoke_in_2003 Jul 2015 #20

It is Aerows Jul 2015 #33

Congratulations to all of us, gay and hetero, on the occasion of this civil rights victory pinboy3niner Jul 2015 #4

This kind of shit HURTS. Aerows Jul 2015 #8

I drink their tears. nt pinboy3niner Jul 2015 #10

I've drank too many Aerows Jul 2015 #14

Most of us do value your input... awoke_in_2003 Jul 2015 #22

This message was self-deleted by its author Mojorabbit Jul 2015 #106

K&R! I am still amazed any of this happened. The timing was just right. Never, did I ever RKP5637 Jul 2015 #15

With the pin boy�... blm Jul 2015 #182

You deserve more than a week, a lifetime, to enjoy finally getting Cleita Jul 2015 #6

It's to the point, on DU Aerows Jul 2015 #12

I hope that does not happen. niyad Jul 2015 #36

Ignore is your good friend. roody Jul 2015 #44

I do Aerows Jul 2015 #193

They never let us have anything DemocraticWing Jul 2015 #7

Here's one straight who does NOT. I thank the gay community for its courage and CTyankee Jul 2015 #11

This is stuff Aerows Jul 2015 #13

oh, god... CTyankee Jul 2015 #24

It seems to be a serious effort to divide the DU community csziggy Jul 2015 #68

You and me both. Aerows Jul 2015 #71

It's so relentless I think they must be trolls csziggy Jul 2015 #72

I'm not here much Nite Owl Jul 2015 #103

I so agree. romanic Jul 2015 #110

All I can say is, consider the source. MADem Jul 2015 #152

Consider the source. Aerows Jul 2015 #161

Yes, I think it's organized disruption. hunter Jul 2015 #135

You got right to the heart of it - it is flamebait Aerows Jul 2015 #154

My sentiments exactly! nt redwitch Jul 2015 #26

I don't understand why we have to automatically accept homophobic framing... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #17

Suspicious of the timing? Aerows Jul 2015 #47

The fact is that some of us do both, and I don't want us to tear down poly people to prop up... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #52

But you are a straight person and you minimize the 'timing' which is the entire point. Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #77

There's nothing wrong with the position itself. n/t Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #83

There's nothing wrong with allowing a hard-won victory to stand as is for the time being, either... LanternWaste Jul 2015 #137

True, but that doesn't excuse the over the top, hateful attacks on poly relationships that I saw... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #142

All of the sudden Aerows Jul 2015 #145

I'm sorry, according to some here, people in poly relationships are swingers, want to molest... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #149

Yes, there is. Because it's a deliberate blurring of the distinction pnwmom Jul 2015 #220

Ah, yes, the picture suddenly makes sense. historylovr Jul 2015 #69

Easy to connect the dots Aerows Jul 2015 #73

Humanist Activist will not acknowledge what you showed him, count on it. Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #79

Of course I acknowledge it. And who is this "they" I'm a part of? n/t Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #84

You did not acknowledge what she linked to, which is a 'flagged for review' gay baiting jerk Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #132

Uhm, I was under a different username, but here you go... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #144

You got right to the heart of it Aerows Jul 2015 #175

It isn't about gay people getting married Aerows Jul 2015 #88

How is advocating that polyamorous relationships get some type of legal protection/recognition... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #107

Singing happy birthday to your own guest at someone else's wedding is poor form LanternWaste Jul 2015 #138

Like I said, the timing sucks, doesn't mean that polygamy delegitimize SSM... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #143

Oh I am so sorry Aerows Jul 2015 #180

I'm sorry that your happiness is dependent on the misery of others... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #186

Here is the status of the poster from Aerow's link: Posting Privileges Revoked by Earl G Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #245

Thank you. Change has come Jul 2015 #108

THAT one's account is "flagged for review", so closeupready Jul 2015 #128

+1 Hekate Jul 2015 #163

^^THIS PowerToThePeople Jul 2015 #48

+10000 eggplant Jul 2015 #81

This straight guy is right there with you... awoke_in_2003 Jul 2015 #18

I think you nailed it Aerows Jul 2015 #196

Yep, you have some trolls awoke_in_2003 Jul 2015 #197

I guess not - in part because there's already been a polygamous legal issue Yo_Mama Jul 2015 #19

They found a new way to gay bash, that's why this 'issue' dropped out of the blue so suddenly Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #21

+infinity etherealtruth Jul 2015 #45

It's freaking mean Aerows Jul 2015 #58

This is part of how one can tell it is a created issue on DU, actual people self advocating would Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #62

I don't let it bother me bigwillq Jul 2015 #23

Oh noes. That means YOU decide how much power your detractors have, and choose not to give them jtuck004 Jul 2015 #169

Message auto-removed Name removed Jul 2015 #25

I have no vested interest Aerows Jul 2015 #29

Post removed Post removed Jul 2015 #31

Your post is hateful bullshit. Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #43

toasters and dogs are not consenting adults in any manner. uppityperson Jul 2015 #42

I know Aerows Jul 2015 #53

polygamous societies are also homophobic societies. geek tragedy Jul 2015 #30

Message auto-removed Name removed Jul 2015 #34

Feel free to provide an example of a secular polygamist society. (nt) jeff47 Jul 2015 #46

and what flavour pizza would you like? niyad Jul 2015 #38

Thank you for providing a perfect example of what the OP complained about. jeff47 Jul 2015 #40

I didn't see all of it time Aerows Jul 2015 #54

are you really that insensitive? do you really not care what your comparison invokes? JanMichael Jul 2015 #49

I am truly sorry etherealtruth Jul 2015 #27

Yo cwydro Jul 2015 #32

Hear, hear! smirkymonkey Jul 2015 #35

DU rec...nt SidDithers Jul 2015 #39

Yup. Agreed. It completely sucks. riderinthestorm Jul 2015 #41

GAH! YES!!! Texasgal Jul 2015 #50

I am disappointed and amazed that this widespread spewing of santorum hifiguy Jul 2015 #51

Recommended! JohnnyLib2 Jul 2015 #55

Obergefell gives many people hope Tatiana La Belle Jul 2015 #56

lol Change has come Jul 2015 #115

I must be old and out of touch because I don't even want polygamy. I have enough to do trying to Ed Suspicious Jul 2015 #57

I hear you. It is truly beyond the pale... Wounded Bear Jul 2015 #59

"As far as I am concerned, gay rights are human rights" Aerows Jul 2015 #102

YW-I choose to believe that.... Wounded Bear Jul 2015 #118

This would be a far better world Aerows Jul 2015 #181

I am so sorry get the red out Jul 2015 #61

the bigots just cannot seem to help themselves, and they do not fool me for a minute Skittles Jul 2015 #63

+a million tammywammy Jul 2015 #76

I'd settle for just 2 fucking days! zappaman Jul 2015 #64

K&R nt LostOne4Ever Jul 2015 #65

Why stop at one week? seveneyes Jul 2015 #66

Do you really not have LGBT friends who are polyamorous, who also want their families recognized? Ms. Toad Jul 2015 #67

Best wishes to them, I hope some say they get the legal status they desire. n/t PoliticAverse Jul 2015 #70

I have gay and lesbian friends Aerows Jul 2015 #75

not one person here ever wants to take that away. everevereverever. laundry_queen Jul 2015 #104

It's really nice that you think know what my life has been like Ms. Toad Jul 2015 #116

Thank you JackInGreen Jul 2015 #78

Thank you Ms. Toad. TM99 Jul 2015 #82

I don't see where Aerows compared poly families to marrying dogs riderinthestorm Jul 2015 #85

Thank you Aerows Jul 2015 #90

. riderinthestorm Jul 2015 #94

I don't see any other way to interpret this: Ms. Toad Jul 2015 #117

The "slippery slope" argument is a RW talking point. Jamastiene Jul 2015 #123

So you understand the Obergefell decision has nothing to do with polygamy riderinthestorm Jul 2015 #134

Here's an example of one post: Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #156

Good God. Aerows Jul 2015 #170

I specifically asked that person if people in polyamorous relationships hurt women.. Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #172

Yes, you aren't differentiating between polyamory and polygamy. The rest of us are riderinthestorm Jul 2015 #171

But she addressed polyamory in this post... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #173

If people followed "I got mine, now I'm done." We would never get anywhere. kjones Jul 2015 #148

This message was self-deleted by its author riderinthestorm Jul 2015 #86

There's a myth that gay people are more promiscuous.... Spitfire of ATJ Jul 2015 #74

Technically, I think it's been over a week, so trolls are coming out snooper2 Jul 2015 #80

No. I can probably dig up 10,000 reasons why we can't have nice things around here. Glassunion Jul 2015 #87

Please Aerows Jul 2015 #93

Well when the hell am I going to be able to use this!!?!?!?!?!!!! Glassunion Jul 2015 #96

Exactly! ismnotwasm Jul 2015 #89

It has gotten out of hand Aerows Jul 2015 #91

And for what? ismnotwasm Jul 2015 #95

Making gay marriage Aerows Jul 2015 #99

I agree with you davidpdx Jul 2015 #92

It is, in my opinion Aerows Jul 2015 #97

Could be jumping on the bandwagon as well davidpdx Jul 2015 #100

I'm still not sure how the continuing freedom movement is an insult to the Gay community Hydra Jul 2015 #98

Apparently, we're on the highway to hell Tatiana La Belle Jul 2015 #101

exactly smiley Jul 2015 #230

Actually, I think the reason we're having so many discussions about it Hydra Jul 2015 #235

not one person blathering about poly has stated that they and their cohort want to get married luvspeas Jul 2015 #105

I have. TM99 Jul 2015 #109

you have been blathering all day...not an insult...it's a fact luvspeas Jul 2015 #111

You just can't stop the insults can you. TM99 Jul 2015 #113

maybe one or more of them don't want to marry you luvspeas Jul 2015 #114

I am done with you. TM99 Jul 2015 #124

It's 90% of what they have so far Hydra Jul 2015 #112

The best way to celebrate freedom attained is to fight for the freedoms still denied. Kurska Jul 2015 #119

nope ibegurpard Jul 2015 #120

What gets me is that I'm not even against polygamy Jamastiene Jul 2015 #121

Right? ismnotwasm Jul 2015 #126

I'm all for polyamory for those who want it, polygamy is a different matter and I have never seen it Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #130

So is it the word polygamy you have a problem with, or the legal recognition of... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #153

Clearly words don't matter, no matter what I write you just play parsing antagonistic fuckery Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #199

Who is Wella and why am I following them? You seem to think there is some conspiracy... Humanist_Activist Jul 2015 #205

Hell has frozen over....you and I agree completely. nt msanthrope Jul 2015 #164

Thank you for a cold splash of reality. It's not about words, it's about what is. nt Hekate Jul 2015 #177

In the strictest sense of the word, yes, Jamastiene Jul 2015 #237

+infinity (nt) LostOne4Ever Jul 2015 #158

That's what made me so irritated that I made this post. Aerows Jul 2015 #174

Well said. I particularly like the "slippery slope" argument used by all that are afraid of progress. rhett o rick Jul 2015 #243

My sentiments exactly. n/t Betty Karlson Jul 2015 #122

Polygamy IS "traditional biblical marriage" grahamhgreen Jul 2015 #125

Divorce is not forbidden oberliner Jul 2015 #127

OT permits divorce, Jesus says divorce is not permitted and any second marriage is adultery. Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #129

"I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality..." oberliner Jul 2015 #131

It means any sexual activity outside the marriage. Obviously. What do you think it means? Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #139

So divorce is permitted according to Jesus oberliner Jul 2015 #141

Yeah, Jesus basic thing is second partner is a no go for either person, period. Voids the whole set Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #185

And *here* Aerows Jul 2015 #188

I for one am unconditionally happy. SusanCalvin Jul 2015 #133

I was wondering if that was what's actually going on LanternWaste Jul 2015 #136

Nope. The RWing concern trolls pounced as soon as the ink dried. Rex Jul 2015 #140

Rex, as usual, you hit the nail on the head Aerows Jul 2015 #178

I am extremely happy for the GLBT win, but I disagree with this post. bobbobbins01 Jul 2015 #146

You put your finger on what's been bugging the hell out of me about the polygamy posts.... Hekate Jul 2015 #147

Exactly what it is, Hekate Aerows Jul 2015 #183

DU never fails to disappoint. Starry Messenger Jul 2015 #151

Plus a million ismnotwasm Jul 2015 #162

It was definitely organized. Just keep a list of those who thought msanthrope Jul 2015 #166

With friends like some on DU, who needs the teaparty as enemies, we have enough already. NoJusticeNoPeace Jul 2015 #176

Someone posted an *excellent* response in a previous thread Orrex Jul 2015 #189

It doesn't just feel like it Aerows Jul 2015 #224

Exactly. Jamastiene Jul 2015 #238

Welcome to progress. The march doesn't stop just because you want it to. craigmatic Jul 2015 #167

Probably not, because there are too many stupid, ignorant assholes? Spider Jerusalem Jul 2015 #168

It is easier to deal with Aerows Jul 2015 #201

Yup, and one of the most prolific of the polygamy OP starters Jamastiene Jul 2015 #239

The right wing use of it is terrible... MellowDem Jul 2015 #179

What's worse it's highly ironic since "Traditional Marriage" owns Polygamy and Pedophilia. Amimnoch Jul 2015 #184

in other words smiley Jul 2015 #187

To some, "exercising free speech" Aerows Jul 2015 #192

thanks for the lesson smiley Jul 2015 #200

I've suffered the consequences for what I believe in Aerows Jul 2015 #202

glad to hear you didn't let anyone silence you. smiley Jul 2015 #204

This is a private web site. You have no free speech rights here. jeff47 Jul 2015 #194

Amen Aerows Jul 2015 #195

Post removed Post removed Jul 2015 #206

This message was self-deleted by its author jeff47 Jul 2015 #209

It is open, brutal harrassment at this point Aerows Jul 2015 #211

Yep, he's a troll. Just careful enough to not use sufficiently inflammatory language to get a hide. jeff47 Jul 2015 #212

You're free to start your own thread instead of playing games in this one. Not cool. Hekate Jul 2015 #225

I can say whatever I want with the framework of the sites rules smiley Jul 2015 #203

If you have to say things Aerows Jul 2015 #208

I'm not sure how I'm skirting the framework of the rules? smiley Jul 2015 #214

Passive aggressive. Cute. Hekate Jul 2015 #227

Fear of Gay people can be found everywhere, cant it. randys1 Jul 2015 #216

Nope! They can ban you just for being an asshole. jeff47 Jul 2015 #210

ban away... smiley Jul 2015 #215

Pretending you are this clueless is not flattering. jeff47 Jul 2015 #218

okay you caught me... smiley Jul 2015 #221

"I have no idea who or what MIRT is." NuclearDem Jul 2015 #231

If you have no idea what MIRT is, then you probably Jamastiene Jul 2015 #240

AT least we have the Gay scaredy cats out in the open this way randys1 Jul 2015 #217

It just about has me in tears, though Aerows Jul 2015 #229

I made a supid mistake 20 yrs ago when I asked my Gay nephew why was he Gay, why not randys1 Jul 2015 #244

sadly I think it is 80/20 DonCoquixote Jul 2015 #191

What hypocrisy. Exilednight Jul 2015 #198

Oh goodness Aerows Jul 2015 #207

Guess what? Shoving polyamory in their face to diminish their victory does not make you look good. jeff47 Jul 2015 #213

Why are you scared of debate? Exilednight Jul 2015 #219

The folks afraid of this debate are the ones who claim it is important but never brought it up until Bluenorthwest Jul 2015 #222

I'm not. Why are you deliberately hurting LGBT people? (nt) jeff47 Jul 2015 #223

What exactly have I done to hurt them? Exilednight Jul 2015 #226

Regurgitated Right-wing talking points about "gay marriage" jeff47 Jul 2015 #233

Debating never hurt anyone. Exilednight Jul 2015 #241

You aren't debating. You're demanding we stop talking about something good jeff47 Jul 2015 #242

You're not allowing the debate. Exilednight Jul 2015 #246

No, I'm not allowing you to smear LGBT people with your right-wing talking point. jeff47 Jul 2015 #248

Nobody is scared of a goddamn thing Aerows Jul 2015 #232

Your attacking me and I have made very few Exilednight Jul 2015 #247

You know the terms "mansplaining" or "whitesplaining"? jeff47 Jul 2015 #249

Bingo. n/t Aerows Jul 2015 #228

Yeah? Well, you're a narcissist, or a hypocrite for wanting that. herding cats Jul 2015 #234

Thank you for this Aerows Jul 2015 #236