General Discussion

Sheepshank

(12,504 posts)

52. My teen white daughter is dating a black male

Wed Jul 22, 2015, 12:43 PM

Jul 2015

they are so flippin cute together. She has lived a quiet, and unbeknown to her, a priviledged life in this not very diverse state. I tried to give her tools and knowledge of how others live and how society treats POC. But you know, in the end they are just words. She couldn't really internalize. She could be loving and kind to everyone, she can be responsible for her actions, but she didn't understand the full weight of what black people carry.

Loving and caring for someone who has experienced the underbelly of racism has made her heart hurt. She hurts for her boyfriend, she hurts that society accepts and coddles such cruelty, and she is embarassed about her naitivity. She had no idea.

The media (MSM and social) has played a huge role in making more of us priviledged persons aware of what we have been ignorning. All of these conversations educate and shine a light on what has been happening and how much of it has been brushed aside via complacancy.

I cant do anything about the past and who said what, who didn't say what, who did or didn't do something. What I really care about is that NOW, if we so desire, we can have our eyes fully and truly opened..that we don't allow ourselves to slip back into complacancy because this is someone elses problem. Our communities and how they treat everyone is of important concern. Our hearts and minds should realize that there is a segment of our society and community that deserve so much better than a nod and wink, as if we know what black people are going through. My daughters eyes have been opened, I doubt they will ever be closed again.

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4 Things You Should Teach Your Kids About Racism Right Now [View all] gollygee Jul 2015 OP

If you can still find it, safeinOhio Jul 2015 #1

Message auto-removed Name removed Jul 2015 #2

You need to read the section about not being "color blind." n/t gollygee Jul 2015 #3

Message auto-removed Name removed Jul 2015 #13

Experts in anti-racism disagree gollygee Jul 2015 #14

Message auto-removed Name removed Jul 2015 #15

I agree with you Telcontar Jul 2015 #17

There are articles linked gollygee Jul 2015 #18

Welcome to DU by the way el_bryanto Jul 2015 #21

My kids have friends of several races and really don't give a shit about their skin color. Nye Bevan Jul 2015 #4

There's a great deal written about why it's important to talk to kids about race gollygee Jul 2015 #6

They don't but the society they live in does. geek tragedy Jul 2015 #8

Yep. Starry Messenger Jul 2015 #9

There is a meaning to "colorblind". qwlauren35 Jul 2015 #28

This message was self-deleted by its author RobertEarl Jul 2015 #5

Completely disagree with her on #3 oberliner Jul 2015 #7

They might be saying that but that's not the reality, and MLK was not "color blind" gollygee Jul 2015 #16

I know there are a lot of articles and studies espousing this view oberliner Jul 2015 #19

I do think it's something well intended people do gollygee Jul 2015 #20

I think it could be an improvement oberliner Jul 2015 #22

It hasn't made an improvement gollygee Jul 2015 #23

It definitely has oberliner Jul 2015 #24

Studies have confirmed that it hasn't gollygee Jul 2015 #25

Studies have confirmed that it has oberliner Jul 2015 #76

like I said, only 're interracial marriage gollygee Jul 2015 #77

That's a pretty illustrative example oberliner Jul 2015 #78

So you didn't read the other questions. gollygee Jul 2015 #82

There's no need for a comment like that oberliner Jul 2015 #83

Oh yeah Oberliner. School 'em with Martin. That'll do the trick! Scootaloo Jul 2015 #56

I don't understand what you mean oberliner Jul 2015 #75

I'll give you my thoughts on this d_r Jul 2015 #79

Colorblind Myth Solly Mack Jul 2015 #10

curious about #1 hfojvt Jul 2015 #11

Our society teaches them these things even if you don't gollygee Jul 2015 #12

our society did NOT teach me those things back in the 1970s hfojvt Jul 2015 #34

There was active anti-racism work going on in the 1970s. gollygee Jul 2015 #36

small areas are part of the nation as a whole hfojvt Jul 2015 #80

I'm basing things on what I've read from people of color, not just my experience gollygee Jul 2015 #81

reading something is not the same as experiencing it hfojvt Jul 2015 #84

and 5 'follow this advice, until someone hands you a new article on the same topic' HFRN Jul 2015 #26

#4 ' if a person of color calls a white person a mean name (cracker, mayo, etc), that isn�t racism.' HFRN Jul 2015 #27

It says exactly that gollygee Jul 2015 #29

because an AA has never been president? nt HFRN Jul 2015 #30

One person with high achievement does not negate the overall level of racism in the US. n/t gollygee Jul 2015 #31

maybe he should have appointed an AA Attourney General then HFRN Jul 2015 #32

Same for 2 people. There are millions of people in the US gollygee Jul 2015 #33

you're facing a paradox here HFRN Jul 2015 #35

What? gollygee Jul 2015 #37

OMG! You don't know what "paradox" means, either. cyberswede Jul 2015 #48

another allegation, without evidence HFRN Jul 2015 #50

The "evidence" is your complete misuse of the word. cyberswede Jul 2015 #51

that's actually a circular arguement HFRN Jul 2015 #53

You misused the word "paradox" and I pointed it out. cyberswede Jul 2015 #58

no, all it means HFRN Jul 2015 #59

Except neither gollygee's nor Orrex's argument contained a logical fallacy. cyberswede Jul 2015 #61

that's your opinion nt HFRN Jul 2015 #63

LOL - if you say so. cyberswede Jul 2015 #65

'Their posts are here for everyone to read' -> yes, they are HFRN Jul 2015 #67

LOL - gollygee and Orrex actually have that honor. cyberswede Jul 2015 #70

the level of nasty and disrepectful calling out by Republicans should have clued you in. Sheepshank Jul 2015 #54

yup, first president in history to be disrespected HFRN Jul 2015 #55

Hmm...neither of those examples shows someone being disrespected due to their race. cyberswede Jul 2015 #60

yes, i guess we could say that when W was compared to a monkey, it wasn't because of his race HFRN Jul 2015 #62

Jesus christ - do some research cyberswede Jul 2015 #64

i noticed you side-stepped the fact, that the exact same thing was done to the previous president nt HFRN Jul 2015 #66

Ok: GWB was compared to a monkey because he is STUPID. cyberswede Jul 2015 #68

you've just made the arguement I've been trying to make, thank you HFRN Jul 2015 #69

Do you actually think people compared GWB to a monkey becasue he's white? cyberswede Jul 2015 #72

i'm going to let the audience think of their own answers to that HFRN Jul 2015 #73

There are several kinds of racism. lumberjack_jeff Jul 2015 #71

Here's an easy way to think of it. Orrex Jul 2015 #38

but you have a straw man arguement HFRN Jul 2015 #39

You need to look up the definition of "strawman" cyberswede Jul 2015 #40

I have, and it was, a straw man HFRN Jul 2015 #42

Reading and pasting is clearly not the same as understanding cyberswede Jul 2015 #43

reading is more than you're doing HFRN Jul 2015 #44

Ouch! cyberswede Jul 2015 #45

a conspicuous lack of evidence in you allegations HFRN Jul 2015 #47

um, what? cyberswede Jul 2015 #49

Digging that hole deeper, eh? zappaman Jul 2015 #46

That wasn't a straw man, and you didn't address any of my points. Orrex Jul 2015 #41

That is a good example virtualobserver Jul 2015 #57

I have a partial answer to your interesting question Orrex Jul 2015 #74

My teen white daughter is dating a black male Sheepshank Jul 2015 #52