Hospice

[greatlaurel]

21. We went through this with my mother. She was able to stay in her home with hospice help.

My sister-in-law was an even greater help. She knew how to give the pain tablets rectally from her experience with her mother. Both dear ladies died of cancers and had a great deal of trouble holding anything down due to the nausea.

Anyway, my mother found some of the hospice workers to be unpleasant and even a little ghoulish. She could not rest while they were in the house. She could not speak any more but kept kicking her leg until my sister caught on(such a smart woman). We told them to leave and not come back. My mother was much happier after that. There was an aid who she felt comfortable with so we had help without having to keep the unpleasant ladies around. My suggestion is to keep an eye out to see if your dad finds any of the hospice people difficult and keep them away from him. Be sure to check the nonverbal signs to make sure he is resting comfortably and is not troubled by the presence of any of the staff.

The hospice brought her oxygen toward the end just so she did not have to struggle to breathe, which is really unpleasant. They were able to provide that as a palliative not as a life extending effort, I think. It has been nearly 20 years, so the details are starting to blur a little.

It is such a difficult thing to loose a loved one. Please accept my sympathy for this difficult passage. Be sure to take of yourself and be gentle with yourself, too. It is taxing physically and mentally.

Take care.