General Discussion

Dorian Gray

(13,850 posts)

114. In the instances

Reply to Warren DeMontague (Original post)

Thu Sep 10, 2015, 07:15 AM

Sep 2015

you mention, you are most likely correct. Addiction is easy to claim if they think it will protect the family from breaking up.

However, I do have a male friend who have a serious problem with porn. He pays more money than he can afford (currently unemployed) on some pretty hard core porn. ANd he hasn't dated in years because he feels inferior to the men in the porn films he watches. It's affected his particular life in a negative way, much beyond just normal libido, masturbation instincts.

There is nothing wrong with a sex drive. But I do think it's possible to have a negative relationship with pornography. Addiction? Maybe. I think it's more indicative of issues that one may already have, and the dependence on porn is a substitute for real relationships. (But the same can be said for internet use, or anything else that keeps someone from engaging in real life activities and relationships. Some people are recluses, insecure, etc. They need to find healthy ways to interact.)

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Amanda Marcotte: No, Porn Addiction Is Not Really A Thing [View all] Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 OP

The word "addiction" has been devalued into complete meaninglessness hifiguy Sep 2015 #1

Not really, there are behavioral patterns that qualify Warpy Sep 2015 #8

I don't think that someone who masturbates regularly is an "addict", do you? Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #12

I think it depends on how it impacts their life mythology Sep 2015 #17

I think that's the point she's making. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #22

Definitely Dorian Gray Sep 2015 #115

probably addiction to that is more like ocd, imo elehhhhna Sep 2015 #78

Turning the light switch on and off twenty-three times Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #93

try the shower massage elehhhhna Sep 2015 #103

what makes you think I haven't? Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #104

If it's compulsive, he'll do it in public Warpy Sep 2015 #20

Bosco will be so relieved. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #30

Agreed. I think you can become addicted to a lot of different things. It's just not as easy as with stevenleser Sep 2015 #16

And yet these religious right or other ideologically motivated outfits define it ALL as "addiction". Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #31

I would agree 100% with the point you are making here. Nt stevenleser Sep 2015 #37

+1000 ^^^ This Guy gets it ^^^ FreakinDJ Sep 2015 #39

Surprising that no one has clued them into the booming male chastity belt market. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #43

+1 DashOneBravo Sep 2015 #50

Oh jeez...who knows what's gonna show up on my on-line ads now! ret5hd Sep 2015 #76

"it was research, honey!" Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #95

There was an episode of Sex Sent Me to the ER kcr Sep 2015 #128

To quote Popeye Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #132

Still doesn't explain why the most devoted are the ones into the kinkiest sex fetishes. Initech Sep 2015 #2

Kinky is using a feather, perverted is using the whole Chicken. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #13

Sexual addiction and pornography addiction are real things. NuclearDem Sep 2015 #3

That's crazy talk. branford Sep 2015 #6

Well, DU definitely has a cadre of Witchfinders General. hifiguy Sep 2015 #7

"Hide, witch, hide. The good folks come to burn thee" hobbit709 Sep 2015 #68

For one, Duggar has built his career on shit like opposing marriage equality. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #14

I'm certainly not going to defend or advocate for Duggar, and my post was clearly in jest. branford Sep 2015 #46

I think it's helpful if we're pointing out that, a) the groups in question Duggar is affiliated with Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #47

Tell Amanda Marcotte. I think she makes good points. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #9

Again, I'm not a psychiatrist, so I'm not going to play one and diagnose Josh Duggar. NuclearDem Sep 2015 #18

I don't think one needs to be a psychiatrist to grok that Duggar seems to have profound problems Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #26

Sure, I understand the point of what Marcotte was saying. NuclearDem Sep 2015 #32

She herself says "here are certainly men out there who use porn so much it interferes with the rest Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #33

Well, dependency and addiction are different things. NuclearDem Sep 2015 #42

I still think it's too broadly defined, in many cases. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #44

The DSM typically has a list of symptoms associated with an addiction. NuclearDem Sep 2015 #48

Would you agree that the folks at "every man's battle" who define all masturbation as pathological Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #49

Entirely agree they're not experts. NuclearDem Sep 2015 #52

In this case, I think Duggar is trying to shirk responsibility. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #53

Bad jobs for more money is a horrid addiction... hunter Sep 2015 #66

I wouldn't categorize every bad decision or crappy life choice as an "addiction". Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #96

But that doesn't mean the reverse is true, that there's no such thing as addiction kcr Sep 2015 #118

who said there's no such thing as addiction? Not me. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #119

It's in the title of the OP kcr Sep 2015 #124

Probably, since Marcotte herself qualifies it. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #125

I understand what you mean. I just think it's a sloppy article. kcr Sep 2015 #126

The headline misrepresents the gist of the article, I agree. At best it's a great oversimplification Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #131

How do you know DU has no psychiatrists? WinkyDink Sep 2015 #27

I think Joe Philly might be one Doctor_J Sep 2015 #45

funny thing gklagan Sep 2015 #58

Very helpful! smirkymonkey Sep 2015 #77

So when "every man's battle" characterizes looking at the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #100

um gklagan Sep 2015 #109

yes, exactly. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #111

Go away - 'baitin! Juicy_Bellows Sep 2015 #4

Indeed. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #10

Although meant to illustrate mankinds demise I hope Juicy_Bellows Sep 2015 #21

People are still ashamed of it? Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #23

Well you know those prudish types. Juicy_Bellows Sep 2015 #34

we all need hobbies. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #35

Ahh, so you're into working with wood? ;) nt. Juicy_Bellows Sep 2015 #36

speaking of Mike Judge Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #38

I'll leave this sub-thread with this - Cheers! Juicy_Bellows Sep 2015 #40

"Your wife was just showing us her Klimt" Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #41

The Masterbation Network. Keeping America 'Baitin For Over 300 Years! Initech Sep 2015 #51

Really gives a new meaning to "Ice Road Truckers", don't it? Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #55

Perhaps you were thinking of the Ice Road Tuggers? Juicy_Bellows Sep 2015 #61

Didn't god comand us to.... PosterChild Sep 2015 #5

And then he sent us Arnold Schwarzenegger Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #11

Ever heard of Onan? WinkyDink Sep 2015 #29

Yes, I named my son after him. (nt) PosterChild Sep 2015 #54

Ignoring the obvious contradiction. WinkyDink Sep 2015 #69

Onan's sin was not masturbation jberryhill Sep 2015 #88

R. Crumb really did a good job on the book of Genesis. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #97

The Forbidden Fruit Effect Oneironaut Sep 2015 #15

Never mind porn addiction. Our real problem is DU addiction. n/t Binkie The Clown Sep 2015 #19

Any behavior which stimulates various parts of the brain geek tragedy Sep 2015 #24

Being alive stimulates various parts of the brain. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #28

I'm not sure the medical community agrees. There's now cell-phone addiction, WinkyDink Sep 2015 #25

There are no 12 step meetings for people addicted to 12 step meetings Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #56

I think they're called "Meta-Meetings." WinkyDink Sep 2015 #70

I knew someone who was in LiberalElite Sep 2015 #72

I think i got all of those except "DA" Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #112

DA is Debtors Anonymous nt LiberalElite Sep 2015 #113

Ah. Gotcha. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #116

Wow. I gotta look that up. (Moral re-armament) nt LiberalElite Sep 2015 #137

obviously the spin is gonna depend on who you ask. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #138

Thanks! nt LiberalElite Sep 2015 #139

Sounds like "Fight Club" the movie. Manifestor_of_Light Sep 2015 #141

Here's Duggar with "porn harms" anti-smut crusader Rick Santorum Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #57

OK, This is IT! The full, complete.... PosterChild Sep 2015 #59

So you agree with Amanda Marcotte, or not? Did you read it? (speaking of TL;DR) Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #65

Consulting the explanatory footnotes, I think..... PosterChild Sep 2015 #67

They do seem obsessed with the need for control: bemildred Sep 2015 #71

Let's say you have . .... PosterChild Sep 2015 #79

There you go. bemildred Sep 2015 #80

""The devil made me do it!" ProudToBeBlueInRhody Sep 2015 #60

FWIW: Ted Bundy Disagrees... jonno99 Sep 2015 #62

Ted Bundy was a pathological liar who was great at telling people what they wanted to hear. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #63

Sexual crimes against women are down? WinkyDink Sep 2015 #75

Your links: Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #85

Interesting. 840high Sep 2015 #64

May be interesting, but ultimately stupid. GoneOffShore Sep 2015 #73

"Without expectation". bemildred Sep 2015 #74

"Without exception" - someone's spell check is on a tear jberryhill Sep 2015 #82

I like it better unfixed, but OK. nt bemildred Sep 2015 #83

I Don't Think He Said RobinA Sep 2015 #105

It also correlates with disrespect for other people and a lack of self-control. bemildred Sep 2015 #106

This message was self-deleted by its author Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #107

"Here I am in prison. I know lots of people who are violent (being in prison) & they all have feet" Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #108

Of course they were! It's prison! LeftyMom Sep 2015 #110

Why does it seem to only affect men? nt threethirteen Sep 2015 #81

Because we're evil, bad, defective and inferior. lumberjack_jeff Sep 2015 #94

You do realize this puritanical attitude towards sex was concocted by men, right? Act_of_Reparation Sep 2015 #135

The fact that men invented porn argues against that. n/t lumberjack_jeff Sep 2015 #136

Right... Act_of_Reparation Sep 2015 #143

If the only thing your hand touches is part of your own body, who gives a crap? mikehiggins Sep 2015 #84

because making people feel guilty about something they're biologically programmed to do is a Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #86

You got booze on your gym socks? jberryhill Sep 2015 #87

I kept my bathtub gin in an old gym sock, sneak into the theater to watch Wallace Beery movies Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #89

With a dime novel in your back pocket, no doubt jberryhill Sep 2015 #90

At outdoor concerts, I stick a pt down my underwear, Jagger style. Eleanors38 Sep 2015 #133

As in Mick, or Meister? jberryhill Sep 2015 #134

HA! Mick-style, though he allegedly used t-paper. Eleanors38 Sep 2015 #146

The Christianity Today piece is hysterical. RiffRandell Sep 2015 #91

Now, if I caught my teenager reading Ayn Rand or the Wall St. Journal editorial page Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #92

All together now! Orrex Sep 2015 #98

I dont get it. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #99

So, ah yeah Youporn is a real thing GOLGO 13 Sep 2015 #101

yeah, anyone who wants a comprehensive list of porn urls, the Indian government recently Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #102

In the instances Dorian Gray Sep 2015 #114

I don't want to sound like I'm questioning the veracity of your anecdote, but it sounds... strange. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #117

What I consider 'pretty hard core' Dorian Gray Sep 2015 #120

Sounds like the depression could be clinical. Medical/chemical. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #121

I should have just Dorian Gray Sep 2015 #122

I hope he gets it sorted out. It's good of you to be compassionate about his issues. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #123

It's totally off the topic to your original post... Dorian Gray Sep 2015 #145

I guess there are some HassleCat Sep 2015 #127

Jesus is busy. hifiguy Sep 2015 #129

I woud hate to be Jesus HassleCat Sep 2015 #130

There certainly is a religious addiction in this country. roamer65 Sep 2015 #140

oddly enough I happened to watch this video yesterday hfojvt Sep 2015 #142

It's pretty clear how the people at "nofap", associated with this Wilson character, feel about it. Warren DeMontague Sep 2015 #144