For the past week, I've been working on a "not-for-publication" book that my younger son requested I write. It's about my brothers and my (and one brother-in-law, on a small scale) participation in the sport of boxing. Now, self-analysis is beneficial -- though it can carry certain risks, including difficulty in objectivity.
A few times -- primarily on the DU sports forum -- I've noted that by and large, the young men who box, and old men who used to box, tend to be the most gentle people .... outside of that ring, of course. But I've never really seen myself in that light. Probably because I know very well my own thinking.
So it tickles me to hear/read someone else saying that maybe, just maybe, I've tamed some of the old demons that drove me to be things other than gentle. Yesterday, out at the pond, while working at the book for my four children and eleven nieces and nephews, I was thinking about both my first and last boxing matches. (There were 327 in between!) I had my first bout at the age of five, and ended at 19. I was never one who enjoyed getting hit -- some boxers really don't mind it -- and it took me up until that last fight to stop being able to justify, much less enjoy, hitting another person. I knew that night, at MacArthur Stadium in Syracuse, that I'd never box again.
I still have times when I get angry. Despite my best efforts, some things really upset me -- far more often something I see in the news, than in my daily life. But I have a great teacher -- actually, five of them (my wife and our two sons and two daughters). I'm not where I want to be -- yet -- but I do try to use the same self-discipline that once made me a talented fighter, to become a human being.
I surely do appreciate your kind words.
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