General Discussion

Jokerman

(3,559 posts)

12. How should this be handled?

Wed Nov 4, 2015, 01:42 PM

Nov 2015

First of all, the guys who try to get her to drink more or take advantage of her in any way are scumbags, but what should a decent human being do to help her?

I guess I would offer my cell phone so she could call a friend or help her get into a taxi. If she doesn't have anyone to call or a safe place to go, what then?

Calling the cops is one answer but I wouldn't want to get her in trouble with the law and in some rare cases, the responding officer(s) may treat her worse than the general public. Don't get me wrong, I'd call the cops before letting some predatory jerk lead her away but that seems like a last resort.

The easy answer would be to ignore her and move on but that may only enable the creeps who want to prey on her.

I'm not the least bit surprised that many men came up with the wrong answer but what is the correct one?

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Highlight:

Woman pretends to be drunk for social experiment, gets barraged by men [View all] Blue_Tires Nov 2015 OP

Yeesh. Urgh. Blagg. Blurrrf. RadiationTherapy Nov 2015 #1

"None offer to help her..." CrispyQ Nov 2015 #2

Sickening, isn't it? smirkymonkey Nov 2015 #14

Such as it ever was...nt jonno99 Nov 2015 #3

Here's the video if you want to be disgusted. progressoid Nov 2015 #4

definitely not watching the video. scum, each and every one of them. niyad Nov 2015 #5

Good gravy come on guys... JackInGreen Nov 2015 #6

Shocking? Is there anyone still shocked by this? Rex Nov 2015 #7

This was in Spain oberliner Nov 2015 #10

The experiment was in Madrid, Spain. nt Erich Bloodaxe BSN Nov 2015 #28

Please name the country where this wouldn't happen. n/t cigsandcoffee Nov 2015 #32

Can't think of one. Rex Nov 2015 #33

I'm not LittleBlue Nov 2015 #57

Not even the tiniest bit shocked. n/t Butterbean Nov 2015 #66

Not surprising Z_California Nov 2015 #8

Huh? Most males are either adolescents or plastic? closeupready Nov 2015 #19

Colloquialisms can be difficult to understand for literalists, I guess. LanternWaste Nov 2015 #48

The predatory class strikes again... CoffeeCat Nov 2015 #9

+100 n/t whathehell Nov 2015 #53

Reminds me of the video of the woman walking through NYC and getting harrassed, Nye Bevan Nov 2015 #11

Except this video wasn't edited to only show dark-skinned folks Blue_Tires Nov 2015 #46

How should this be handled? Jokerman Nov 2015 #12

Stay with her, get her sober. Try and get her to text a friend for help and if she won't try and bettyellen Nov 2015 #13

Good advice, but her phone battery was dead. Jokerman Nov 2015 #16

I was going to say coffee shop too- and ask for help with the charging it there. bettyellen Nov 2015 #18

Agreed Jokerman Nov 2015 #22

As long as you don't try to get her drunker, or get her alone no one will think it's a problem bettyellen Nov 2015 #24

Random people on the street should stay with the drunk woman until she sobers up? The2ndWheel Nov 2015 #23

People who actually want to help should help. Some people have empathy, and almost everyone has bettyellen Nov 2015 #25

Did I say she should be "punished" by rapists? The2ndWheel Nov 2015 #38

Are they obligated to help? No. Would it be the decent thing to do? Yes. Jokerman Nov 2015 #26

Help with what though? The2ndWheel Nov 2015 #50

It doesn't take a mind-reader to recognize that someone could be vulnerable. Jokerman Nov 2015 #60

You're just playing ignorant again with this silly "do women just need help all the time" crap. bettyellen Nov 2015 #62

Not to mention, she might not have chosen to drink excessively. KitSileya Nov 2015 #39

How is anyone supposed to know any details? The2ndWheel Nov 2015 #55

She was staggering, with predators closing in. It's not as hard as you pretend it is. Almost anyone bettyellen Nov 2015 #65

I would try to help her, yes Skittles Nov 2015 #49

Was she asking for help? The2ndWheel Nov 2015 #51

I don't care Skittles Nov 2015 #59

Many of us have! And would again. bettyellen Nov 2015 #63

yup Skittles Nov 2015 #68

My nephew did more than a few times on his campus. If you're a decent human being it's what you do. bettyellen Nov 2015 #71

Clarification, please Orrex Nov 2015 #29

Good for you, Orrex. You're right that sometimes it's hard to know how to help, but in the case pnwmom Nov 2015 #37

Aw, shucks! Orrex Nov 2015 #44

Well if she needed help getting the phone in working order (as in the video) or was starting to nod out bettyellen Nov 2015 #64

Seems to me you have all the answers right there. Brickbat Nov 2015 #15

Not really confusion, just trying not to make the situation any worse. Jokerman Nov 2015 #21

Homeless shelter if she has nowhere? treestar Nov 2015 #17

Get her a taxi ride home, but hey the driver might be a guy too. Rex Nov 2015 #34

First, stay with her. Help her sober up. riderinthestorm Nov 2015 #43

Great answer! Jokerman Nov 2015 #45

I second that -- You are a good guy to ask this question. n/t whathehell Nov 2015 #52

Call the police NickB79 Nov 2015 #54

I hate to say it but in today's world... Drahthaardogs Nov 2015 #61

some offered her their lancer78 Nov 2015 #72

This was Madrid, Spain? Had it been tried in Italy, she wouldn't even need to be drunk NightWatcher Nov 2015 #20

Or in America. Rex Nov 2015 #36

remember how a bunch of men whined when it was noted that all men geek tragedy Nov 2015 #27

MRA regulars won't touch this post. trumad Nov 2015 #31

What year? DU been around a long time now. Rex Nov 2015 #35

2012, 2013, 2014, etc etc. geek tragedy Nov 2015 #40

When I was in college, a friend of ours got blasted at a party. We walked her back to the dorm NickB79 Nov 2015 #56

it's really disturbing. one would hope this kind of stuff would be going away, geek tragedy Nov 2015 #58

This is why I never get drunk. Oneironaut Nov 2015 #30

No one at all tried to help her? Make7 Nov 2015 #41

some offered their phones lancer78 Nov 2015 #73

We (men) are pigs...not all but way more than are not /nt sdfernando Nov 2015 #42

I kinda figured that reading the thread, common sense solutions would get lost in problematic what-i LanternWaste Nov 2015 #47

Not surprised in the least. Quantess Nov 2015 #67

For those saying take her to a coffee shop, wait with her until a friend comes, etc., Nye Bevan Nov 2015 #69

I've seen it and done it at frat parties, bars in NYC and another town that is basically like a bettyellen Nov 2015 #70