General Discussion

MADem

(135,425 posts)

60. Paging Dr. Freud.

Sat Nov 21, 2015, 10:26 AM

Nov 2015

So you're expressing agita about YOUR uncomfortable feelings with regard to these words when you complain about someone else using them?

Sorry. I think it's you. You're the one with the problem.

Culture and tradition dictate what most people call their relatives. Pops, paw, babo, babu, abu, pater, etc...it just depends on where you're from and how your family approaches the matter.

I think you're getting spun up over an issue that's entirely of your own invention. And it's NOT a 'serious' issue, either--to anyone save yourself.

Edit history

Please sign in to view edit histories.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

217 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

Is grown women calling their fathers "Daddy" a sign of unconscious submission to patriarchy? [View all] Shankapotomus Nov 2015 OP

Nope. I called my dad "Daddy" until the day he died. leftofcool Nov 2015 #1

Me too... msrizzo Nov 2015 #67

me 3 840high Nov 2015 #138

Me 4 Mojorabbit Nov 2015 #157

Wow Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #177

He had a wry sense of humor. If I said, "Father, I have a bone to pick with you" Mojorabbit Nov 2015 #197

Your Dad sounds like a great person Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #199

...and then I turned the gun on Mommy jberryhill Nov 2015 #71

......... sufrommich Nov 2015 #73

LMAO leftofcool Nov 2015 #152

What is really freakish: Spouses calling each other 'daddy' and 'mommy.' nt TheBlackAdder Nov 2015 #116

Not really she earned the title FreakinDJ Nov 2015 #155

My parents called each other Mother and Father. When they did us kids ran LiberalArkie Nov 2015 #203

I called mine daddy until he died. Except I called him grandaddy when my son was around. peacebird Nov 2015 #179

The only adult people I can recall doing that were men, from the south, referring to their "daddy" etherealtruth Nov 2015 #2

I can understand "Dad" Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #9

.. and Mama? etherealtruth Nov 2015 #12

Yeeeeah, I know what you mean sibelian Nov 2015 #21

I agree with you Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #172

It's awkward. sibelian Nov 2015 #178

I'm pretty sure that if you Aerows Nov 2015 #188

There's a difference between deference and affection TexasMommaWithAHat Nov 2015 #83

My father was southern and black. TM99 Nov 2015 #84

Yes, indeed. narnian60 Nov 2015 #89

Same here, with my northern, white dad. Lizzie Poppet Nov 2015 #114

I'm From PA RobinA Nov 2015 #183

I still call my dad "daddy" Marrah_G Nov 2015 #76

Feeling love for one's parents (and expressing it) is a good thing etherealtruth Nov 2015 #78

It's definitely a Southern thing Aerows Nov 2015 #142

Yeah .. we don't call our parents by their given names in the north, either etherealtruth Nov 2015 #143

I figured as much Aerows Nov 2015 #144

No It's Not RobinA Nov 2015 #184

Far be it from an outsider Aerows Nov 2015 #186

Seriously? whathehell Nov 2015 #196

When my step-sons are talking to me OriginalGeek Nov 2015 #217

My dad was daddy and my mom was mother till they both died... CTyankee Nov 2015 #154

My father has always been "Daddy" Aerows Nov 2015 #162

No (nt) bigwillq Nov 2015 #3

And what is it a sign of if grown men call their mothers "Mama"? hobbit709 Nov 2015 #4

For David Vitter it means his diaper is about to be changed Major Nikon Nov 2015 #210

My son is 41 years old,he calls my parents sufrommich Nov 2015 #5

But isn't there an implied wink Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #168

No, there is no implied wink,why would there be? nt sufrommich Nov 2015 #169

Okay so if the word "father" on all kinds of forms and speech Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #171

You don't see "Mom" or "Dad on forms either. There's a difference between sufrommich Nov 2015 #173

Daddy RobinA Nov 2015 #185

No. enough Nov 2015 #6

"23 Chromosome Provider" jberryhill Nov 2015 #69

lol treestar Nov 2015 #92

I refer to mine as mythology Nov 2015 #150

Nope JustAnotherGen Nov 2015 #7

Wtf? pintobean Nov 2015 #8

You've come to the right place for that -none Nov 2015 #35

Are you serious? Quantess Nov 2015 #10

I think it's a silly jab at someone on DU. sufrommich Nov 2015 #13

It's not a jab Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #15

I'm not going to play along with this. sufrommich Nov 2015 #22

It makes no difference at all..., daleanime Nov 2015 #27

But do you agree that pancake bunny is sufrommich Nov 2015 #32

Yes, but it would be much better pintobean Nov 2015 #40

That is JESUS CAT--he walks on water! MADem Nov 2015 #130

I like it, but I think this has more gravitis. kiva Nov 2015 #123

You win 5 internets. sufrommich Nov 2015 #140

Paging Dr. Freud. MADem Nov 2015 #60

LOL- Great lead line-Reminded me of redstateblues Nov 2015 #85

I LOVE that movie! Jane Lynch--HILARIOUS! MADem Nov 2015 #112

yes, it's a class thing treestar Nov 2015 #91

Wait, is this just like the "Tr*pical" thread that was posted yesterday? MH1 Nov 2015 #65

I hope my daughters never stop calling me "daddy." Throd Nov 2015 #136

Who cares? Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #14

So it is your theory that arents are forcing their children to use certain names? Thor_MN Nov 2015 #23

What rot!!! Punkingal Nov 2015 #48

Thank you. narnian60 Nov 2015 #93

Wow ... just wow. MH1 Nov 2015 #68

So How's This RobinA Nov 2015 #187

It's called fascism ... TheFarS1de Nov 2015 #189

Fascism? Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #192

Sorry ... TheFarS1de Nov 2015 #193

It's odd how often all the people outraged Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #194

I doubt it jamzrockz Nov 2015 #11

Pffft. Itchinjim Nov 2015 #16

Obviously, a parent. (eom) Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #18

Pffft. muriel_volestrangler Nov 2015 #137

Hm. It's very easy to add together little things and put big labels on them. sibelian Nov 2015 #17

If you know it is none of your business, as you say Cal Carpenter Nov 2015 #19

So the possibility someone has serious parent/child issues Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #25

Perhaps I haven't had enough coffee this morning Cal Carpenter Nov 2015 #34

I think it's cultural, actually...Women from the South & Southwest use it much more whathehell Nov 2015 #20

All of us in the south didn't live in a Tennessee Williams story... Punkingal Nov 2015 #50

This OP is aimed at a particular female DUer. sufrommich Nov 2015 #53

What a ridiculous waste of time. Punkingal Nov 2015 #55

Well,if it makes any difference, sufrommich Nov 2015 #59

Thank you! Punkingal Nov 2015 #62

No kidding..I don't believe I either said or implied that you did whathehell Nov 2015 #96

No johnson_z Nov 2015 #24

God I hope my Daughter continues to call me Daddy the rest of her life. trumad Nov 2015 #26

Good Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #30

Yes! 6chars Nov 2015 #43

Love ScreamingMeemie Nov 2015 #108

What about grown men calling their dads "Dad" or their moms "Mom"? Renew Deal Nov 2015 #28

It's "Daddy" or "Mommy" Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #33

Could be nostalgia Renew Deal Nov 2015 #44

If they didn't call them "Dad" or "Mom", what would they call them? Their first names? ladjf Nov 2015 #119

Or it might be a southern thing. stage left Nov 2015 #29

My sister's boys treestar Nov 2015 #95

Why would "childless" DUers care how other people address their parents? Renew Deal Nov 2015 #31

My point was Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #37

I can only speak for myself Reter Nov 2015 #36

Exactly Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #39

Same here. smirkymonkey Nov 2015 #106

What a self-centric perspective Boomer Nov 2015 #38

Do you think it represents Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #42

Loving and respecting your parents is like, so, ughhhh, ya know? FrodosPet Nov 2015 #66

Ok, as a childless DUer... Erich Bloodaxe BSN Nov 2015 #41

I think, at an early age, Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #45

Who is this "we" you speak of? Boomer Nov 2015 #49

Yes! narnian60 Nov 2015 #97

I get the sign of fondness and Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #195

Words have meaning Boomer Nov 2015 #47

Well, I don't consider paraphilias to be 'pathologies', merely predilections or choices. Erich Bloodaxe BSN Nov 2015 #52

Thanks for the clarification of your view Boomer Nov 2015 #58

I disagree personally with the DSM-IV on a number of subjects ;) Erich Bloodaxe BSN Nov 2015 #64

The use of the word "Mommy" is actually more intriguing Boomer Nov 2015 #77

No. I am a grown woman, no kids, grew up in West Virginia. Tanuki Nov 2015 #46

No, not at all. EV_Ares Nov 2015 #51

No A Little Weird Nov 2015 #54

is this post a sign that you have too much free time? TheSarcastinator Nov 2015 #56

I don't think free time is the problem Boomer Nov 2015 #61

Nonsense Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #147

I am 56, married and have no children. The answer is no. ms liberty Nov 2015 #57

Are ryan_cats Nov 2015 #63

No. My father died in 1992, but I always called him Daddy because that is what we tblue37 Nov 2015 #70

I have a cousin named after her mom,we still call her sufrommich Nov 2015 #79

what did you call your Mom and Dad?, it's always been 'Mom & Dad' for me, and for some people it's Sunlei Nov 2015 #72

Oh for fucks sake Marrah_G Nov 2015 #74

I'm not pissed Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #159

Pfffffffft. Warren DeMontague Nov 2015 #207

nope it's just the word they have always used karynnj Nov 2015 #75

My sister always did it. I found it stupid & annoying giftedgirl77 Nov 2015 #80

i think calling parents mommy & daddy when over 12 years old is freaking weird. JanMichael Nov 2015 #81

No, not mean and nasty... Punkingal Nov 2015 #94

I know what you mean. Mariana Nov 2015 #99

My daughter only begins conversations with Mommy/Mama when something has gone horribly ScreamingMeemie Nov 2015 #121

No, but paying any attention to such personal names for parents MineralMan Nov 2015 #82

My girls use it, but only in writing. DFW Nov 2015 #86

I don't think so. It beats "materialistic running dog capitalist swine." Buns_of_Fire Nov 2015 #87

No it's just a family/regional thing treestar Nov 2015 #88

Message auto-removed Name removed Nov 2015 #90

Stop at the 'not your business' part... TipTok Nov 2015 #98

Are grown men calling their mother "mommy" a sign of unconscious submission to matriarchy? EX500rider Nov 2015 #100

Good point Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #148

No. ismnotwasm Nov 2015 #101

My kids call me ATM randys1 Nov 2015 #102

Ha ha trumad Nov 2015 #117

I would call it a cultural attitude expressed in language nt Agnosticsherbet Nov 2015 #103

FFS.... ileus Nov 2015 #104

Yo mama! tularetom Nov 2015 #105

No erpowers Nov 2015 #107

Re Edit: I have kids, but neither refer to their father as "Daddy" when we talk about him... ScreamingMeemie Nov 2015 #109

Reagan called his wife "mommy" Matariki Nov 2015 #110

No. Whose narrative are you talking about? eom LiberalElite Nov 2015 #111

The underlying and unquestioned cultural narrative (eom) Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #175

???? LiberalElite Nov 2015 #176

Yes. Anything more affectionate than "sperm donor" is obeisance to the patriarchy Orrex Nov 2015 #113

I'm a 66 year old, childless woman. Vinca Nov 2015 #115

I'm a 66-year-old childless woman, too! Howdy! WinkyDink Nov 2015 #125

I trust you have no "daddy" issues either. LOL. Vinca Nov 2015 #139

My poppa was always and even after his death my "poppa". ladjf Nov 2015 #118

"I'm a guy and I know it's none of my business" 951-Riverside Nov 2015 #120

My Wife calls me Daddy... cherokeeprogressive Nov 2015 #122

What utter bilge. I'm as independent as Annie Oakley, and I called my late father "Daddy." WinkyDink Nov 2015 #124

Does anybody have any butter? I'm out. Initech Nov 2015 #126

Nope...not when it's their own father Chitown Kev Nov 2015 #127

I think, in order to eliminate all vestiges of the patriarchy that, in the future GoneOffShore Nov 2015 #128

No elleng Nov 2015 #129

No. nt LostOne4Ever Nov 2015 #131

Good job Kalidurga Nov 2015 #132

Lots of time on your hands eh? Katashi_itto Nov 2015 #133

People have no shortage of things to complain about do they? Initech Nov 2015 #200

My Daddy is 90. NOLALady Nov 2015 #134

I'm called daddy all the time Prism Nov 2015 #135

I've been calling him Daddy Aerows Nov 2015 #141

Could be. Kali Nov 2015 #145

i'm in my mid-30s and still call him daddy fizzgig Nov 2015 #146

I not saying everyone Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #149

I don't know. Chan790 Nov 2015 #151

Isn't that a Southern thing? I'm a Texan and I thought it was common and everyone did it. CTyankee Nov 2015 #153

I am 57 years old. I still say Mama and Daddy. ladyVet Nov 2015 #156

The proper term is "Parental Unit". kwassa Nov 2015 #158

A refreshing stance Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #166

My three adult daughters call me "Dad" SwissTony Nov 2015 #160

Okay, now you've done it. Adrahil Nov 2015 #214

There's a whole film on the subject SwissTony Nov 2015 #216

HE made me call him "otosama!" yuiyoshida Nov 2015 #161

HaHa <-Get it? Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #163

otosan is used for some one else's father yuiyoshida Nov 2015 #164

No. It is a sign of affection, not submission. mikehiggins Nov 2015 #165

I should have said in the OP Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #167

No, not "semi serious manner like a joke TexasMommaWithAHat Nov 2015 #182

No, I don't think so. Zing Zing Zingbah Nov 2015 #170

"...I know it's none of my business..." Iggo Nov 2015 #174

Bingo. Aerows Nov 2015 #190

It's a personal preference loyalsister Nov 2015 #180

No I don't believe so but Drale Nov 2015 #181

I think it's cultural and familial. You use the word people around you use. nt pnwmom Nov 2015 #191

Well, LWolf Nov 2015 #198

. RandySF Nov 2015 #201

Mom. Mum. Mommy! alphafemale Nov 2015 #202

No. It's just a way of referring to one's father. cheapdate Nov 2015 #204

Who's your daddy? Person 2713 Nov 2015 #205

The Yankees Major Nikon Nov 2015 #211

If I had a nickle for every Mexican woman who called me papi... AngryAmish Nov 2015 #206

I'm more stunned by how many people are unaware that there are cultural differences at play. Blasphemer Nov 2015 #208

All three of us kids (two female, one male) called our daddy "Daddy"... countryjake Nov 2015 #209

Far from submission, I was Daddy's favorite because I would stand up to him. WillowTree Nov 2015 #212

Thank you for sharing Shankapotomus Nov 2015 #213

I truly think the exceptions are actually the rule. ScreamingMeemie Nov 2015 #215