General Discussion

Betty Karlson

(7,231 posts)

136. That is true too.

Reply to FBaggins (Reply #73)

Wed Dec 9, 2015, 08:44 AM

Dec 2015

Respect has to come from both sides for the exchange to be respectful.

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No, We Won�t Calm Down � Tone Policing Is Just Another Way to Protect Privilege [View all] KamaAina Dec 2015 OP

Proud to be the first K&R Warpy Dec 2015 #1

This is why when my Rethug family members voice their stupid opinions ncjustice80 Dec 2015 #120

Ha ! What a pantload Bonx Dec 2015 #2

Because .... ? marble falls Dec 2015 #25

Letting someone know that you aren't interested in their vitriol Bonx Dec 2015 #28

So with you its form over substance. And no-one is allowed to express concern for being ignored.... marble falls Dec 2015 #87

If you don't care enough about an argument to put it into civil and rational discourse hifiguy Dec 2015 #94

How do you yourself know when you are acting "obnoxious?" I'm hard cold serious here. hunter Dec 2015 #146

I consider the company I am in, hifiguy Dec 2015 #148

I quit high school because the bullies had taken to calling me queerbait in middle school... hunter Dec 2015 #150

I was never happier than during my seven years in academia. hifiguy Dec 2015 #155

I won't tone police this reaction. Betty Karlson Dec 2015 #27

I was curious if anyone would police my tone Bonx Dec 2015 #29

So that's why I could not detect an argument? Betty Karlson Dec 2015 #33

lol cyberswede Dec 2015 #78

Just hysterical women lark Dec 2015 #82

Probably because that's what you were looking for Bonx Dec 2015 #102

Good points but there is a difference between expressing emotions and hyperbole and extreme rhetoric aikoaiko Dec 2015 #3

Fuck that. Lizzie Poppet Dec 2015 #4

Agreed. hifiguy Dec 2015 #49

A good break down. GoneFishin Dec 2015 #5

What if your tone triggers someones anxiety? ForgoTheConsequence Dec 2015 #6

or what if someone's ragetone comes across as bullying? Facility Inspector Dec 2015 #7

How can I tell ragetone from righteoustone ? Bonx Dec 2015 #8

ragetone is in the selfrighteoustone family Facility Inspector Dec 2015 #9

They all sound the same to me. Bonx Dec 2015 #11

I use the Chanty Binx rule of thumb LOL snooper2 Dec 2015 #14

Absolutely. ForgoTheConsequence Dec 2015 #12

Depends on who is getting triggered methinks. ncjustice80 Dec 2015 #121

well, Facility Inspector Dec 2015 #10

Many adults believe tone is never used in serious conversations LanternWaste Dec 2015 #16

Serious conversations Facility Inspector Dec 2015 #17

Never engaging someone's argument, only chastising their tone, Betty Karlson Dec 2015 #31

FI never said that (s)he would never engage the argument... FBaggins Dec 2015 #73

That is true too. Betty Karlson Dec 2015 #136

Jury results (I kid you not). MeNMyVolt Dec 2015 #85

Juror #4! Matariki Dec 2015 #90

It's a thing of beauty. Wish I'd thought of it. MeNMyVolt Dec 2015 #92

You have GOT to be kidding me. hifiguy Dec 2015 #93

I like Juror #4 d_legendary1 Dec 2015 #100

That one is exquisitely ripe. Eleanors38 Dec 2015 #156

Derp. KamaAina Dec 2015 #109

Fuck "grown ups" hunter Dec 2015 #71

K&R. nt DLevine Dec 2015 #13

Best radicalizing psyop ever made. And many of us swallow it whole. Shandris Dec 2015 #15

the meme du jour saturnsring Dec 2015 #18

Listening is best. JDPriestly Dec 2015 #19

+1 Bubzer Dec 2015 #45

A Zen response, JD. Dont call me Shirley Dec 2015 #118

Any topic that can't be discussed civilly won't be discussed by me. Xithras Dec 2015 #20

Anyone who reduces minorities and the oppressed to children Lordquinton Dec 2015 #22

Sorry, but that is bullshit and offensive. Xithras Dec 2015 #24

You seem angry Lordquinton Dec 2015 #42

*snerk* cyberswede Dec 2015 #80

He shoots, he scores. nt awoke_in_2003 Dec 2015 #139

Whoosh. hifiguy Dec 2015 #50

Such an angry response Lordquinton Dec 2015 #56

The "Angry Atheist" meme is often put into play Lordquinton Dec 2015 #21

Bullshit. I'm an atheist who has disdain for "angry atheist guy". Throd Dec 2015 #30

Atheists are told that they're angry even when they're expressing themselves Arugula Latte Dec 2015 #39

I generally reply with: Not yet, but i'm getting there. Bubzer Dec 2015 #43

I really haven't had that treatment. Throd Dec 2015 #46

It happens in real life but also all the time on the Internet. Arugula Latte Dec 2015 #54

People are rude on the internet? Throd Dec 2015 #57

Yeah, I know, no kidding, but we're just pointing out a common tactic used Arugula Latte Dec 2015 #74

Well, we obviously have nothing to be angry about, then. Act_of_Reparation Dec 2015 #61

So I should be angry? At whom should I be angry with? Throd Dec 2015 #70

Yeah, wow, that's fascinating. Act_of_Reparation Dec 2015 #88

Yep. I've had that experience hifiguy Dec 2015 #51

What many here aren't getting is that tone policing isn't about tone at all Lordquinton Dec 2015 #62

Talking about the facts is one thing. hifiguy Dec 2015 #68

I find the later is the one that's calling the other angry Lordquinton Dec 2015 #99

I am willing to give a calm hearing to a very broad spectrum of viewpoints hifiguy Dec 2015 #101

The point in the OP is that discussion is stopped before that point Lordquinton Dec 2015 #114

Whatever. I'm much more like Data or Spock, being on the autism spectrum, hifiguy Dec 2015 #115

You're almost there Lordquinton Dec 2015 #117

Why are you so angry? Lordquinton Dec 2015 #44

I was going to say the same thing. If you take issue with the presumption of a god, Arugula Latte Dec 2015 #36

+ a brazilian hifiguy Dec 2015 #52

The point of the OP is being fully backed up by this thread Lordquinton Dec 2015 #53

Good points. Arugula Latte Dec 2015 #55

And I'm told I'm angry for bringing it up. Lordquinton Dec 2015 #63

Exactly. It's ad hominem. And it's fucking despicable. Act_of_Reparation Dec 2015 #69

*This* ananda Dec 2015 #154

Hmmmm. I don't remember President Obama ever acting like a petulant asshole. Nye Bevan Dec 2015 #23

It's not Trump's tone, it's insanity. blackspade Dec 2015 #35

On DU, the tone policing comes with death sentences, just like the streets of urban areas. Proserpina Dec 2015 #26

+1000 K&R blackspade Dec 2015 #32

fuck da tone police... KG Dec 2015 #34

Rant and rave all you want. Don't be surprised when people tune you out over time. Throd Dec 2015 #37

You're missing the point. It's not really ranting and raving -- Arugula Latte Dec 2015 #75

If it comes off as ranting and raving, it gets dismissed, no matter how valid the point. Throd Dec 2015 #108

any time a woman raises her voice the least little bit, she is "raving and ranting", according niyad Dec 2015 #141

Not much different than Concern Trolling, is it? MynameisBlarney Dec 2015 #38

I dont know about this one. Bubzer Dec 2015 #40

I'm outraged that someone is shaming me for demanding respectful conversation. hueymahl Dec 2015 #41

So then.... Rafale Dec 2015 #47

Women are Tone Policed all the time. Dont call me Shirley Dec 2015 #48

because society has expected them to "smooth things over" for so long, being blunt is confused with bettyellen Dec 2015 #95

In Hawai'i, there is a phrase "loudmout' haole" KamaAina Dec 2015 #107

I have gotten absolutely stunned reactions for calmly but bluntly disagreeing with men bettyellen Dec 2015 #111

Ho! You one loudmout' haole, ya buggah! KamaAina Dec 2015 #116

Stop being so SHRILL! PassingFair Dec 2015 #137

I'm not shrill, I have an anger problem... Dont call me Shirley Dec 2015 #149

I note it is not an "issue." How refreshing! Eleanors38 Dec 2015 #157

If only more people in American acted like Donald Trump! Democat Dec 2015 #58

This may work on Ivy League campuses. Elsewhere, not so much Ex Lurker Dec 2015 #59

Living in an autistic spectrum fog, I never know what someone else is thinking about my words... hunter Dec 2015 #86

Another spectrum resident here. hifiguy Dec 2015 #96

Many times I have referred to the "blah, blah, Ginger" cartoon. It's a classic. GoneFishin Dec 2015 #125

I've had several close autistic friends. Kurska Dec 2015 #145

The tone arument is a dodge. Iggo Dec 2015 #60

Sounds like an excuse my toddler would use... TipTok Dec 2015 #64

Ah, yes. In adoption related issues I refer to this as the 'big hush'. me b zola Dec 2015 #65

kick Angry Dragon Dec 2015 #66

Message auto-removed Name removed Dec 2015 #67

Thanks for proving the point - your privilege is showing. cyberswede Dec 2015 #77

Message auto-removed Name removed Dec 2015 #83

I'm sorry, did you say something? cyberswede Dec 2015 #91

... NutmegYankee Dec 2015 #110

This is the new social justice warrior's defense Township75 Dec 2015 #72

Because if you're considered obnoxious, you're obviously wrong and should GTFO. Act_of_Reparation Dec 2015 #104

You can be as obnoxious as you want Bonx Dec 2015 #105

Thanks! I will. Act_of_Reparation Dec 2015 #135

An example of someone who will not submit to tone policing hueymahl Dec 2015 #76

I sense a lot of unproductive anger in this thread! Helen Borg Dec 2015 #79

K&R'd! Photographer Dec 2015 #81

"It's too soon to talk about guns" is a fine example.... Spitfire of ATJ Dec 2015 #84

LIKE TERRORIST.................................................................... d_legendary1 Dec 2015 #113

Everything I need to know in life I learned from Seinfeld... Gidney N Cloyd Dec 2015 #89

Sometimes romanic Dec 2015 #97

Case by case basis... ecstatic Dec 2015 #98

Heh I don't show respect to any police. ;p ncjustice80 Dec 2015 #122

A cover story for some who think they have a right to be abusive to others. Waiting For Everyman Dec 2015 #103

Can you have safe zones without tone policing ? Bonx Dec 2015 #106

You shout whatever you want at people and then run back in your safe zone Democat Dec 2015 #131

There are too many words for things and situations that just used to happen. craigmatic Dec 2015 #112

Just what I needed.... Heeeeers Johnny Dec 2015 #119

Jazz hands? Beartracks Dec 2015 #143

Did you Google it? Heeeeers Johnny Dec 2015 #152

Oh, yeah, I'd forgotten about that. Beartracks Dec 2015 #163

I support the right of all those suffering Shankapotomus Dec 2015 #123

k and r + gazillion niyad Dec 2015 #124

Tone policing! I love it. You see lots of this tactic on DU. nt valerief Dec 2015 #126

Great OP! DemocraticWing Dec 2015 #127

K&R betsuni Dec 2015 #128

I saw a textbook example of this oh three hours ago nadinbrzezinski Dec 2015 #129

It depends. MadDAsHell Dec 2015 #130

KnR. nt tblue37 Dec 2015 #132

but....words hurt people. ileus Dec 2015 #133

What is the difference between complaining about "tone policing" and "political correctness"? Renew Deal Dec 2015 #134

Use whatever tone you want. NaturalHigh Dec 2015 #138

K&R, big-time. (nt) Paladin Dec 2015 #140

TRUMPet your message. Democrats_win Dec 2015 #142

Will people willingly listen to someone screaming at them? whathehell Dec 2015 #144

Sometimes you have to slap them too. hunter Dec 2015 #147

Yeah, unfortunately, they slap you back and then sue you for assault.. whathehell Dec 2015 #161

In other words, talk to everyone like they are a baby. n/t earthside Dec 2015 #151

Did they hand this cartoon to John Lewis when he went to tone police for Hillary when BLM came Erich Bloodaxe BSN Dec 2015 #153

Honestly the fact that this point has to be explained with a cartoon romanic Dec 2015 #158

Do not go gentle into that good night bluedigger Dec 2015 #159

I like this op Brainstormy Dec 2015 #160

Tme the key part mercuryblues Dec 2015 #162