General Discussion

karynnj

(61,163 posts)

24. the service is really for the survivors, so she should

Mon Dec 28, 2015, 02:00 PM

Dec 2015

Do what she thinks helps her and other loved ones the most. I think most religions will perform services. Because it is most likely that anyone who commits suicide is depressed, even if a religion considers it unacceptable, they consider it the result of the illness.

I can not think of anything that would make me more in need of the closure that a service, religious or not, would have .... even knowing that this is something that will always hurt.

Edit history

Please sign in to view edit histories.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

43 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

a friend of mine had a terrible tragedy happen Christmas day. Her son killed himself [View all] demtenjeep Dec 2015 OP

My s/o's cousin recently killed himself. beam me up scottie Dec 2015 #1

can I share that with her? demtenjeep Dec 2015 #2

Of course, that's why I shared. beam me up scottie Dec 2015 #3

For young people the service is both a closing and a way of jwirr Dec 2015 #27

It was very hard on everyone, his girlfriend was the one who found him. beam me up scottie Dec 2015 #29

A service would be fine, but it's her decision pinboy3niner Dec 2015 #4

I am very sorry for your loss - nt KingCharlemagne Dec 2015 #41

A friend killed himself in high school. What we, his friends, thought was sadness and built that we uppityperson Dec 2015 #5

A service is generally for the survivors BlueMTexpat Dec 2015 #6

She can have a service. leftyladyfrommo Dec 2015 #7

She needs a memorial service, or, funeral OldRedneck Dec 2015 #8

I hope she's able to have a service if she wants one. LuvNewcastle Dec 2015 #9

she should have the service she wants and needs Skittles Dec 2015 #10

"people" will think this was a terrible tragedy etherealtruth Dec 2015 #11

IMO she should have a service that she feels most comfortable with BainsBane Dec 2015 #12

My oldest son was a senior in high school when a friend of his committed suicide mnhtnbb Dec 2015 #13

OF COURSE she can have a service for her son if she wants! One of my niece's friends pnwmom Dec 2015 #14

When I was a senior in college Snobblevitch Dec 2015 #15

No not always temporary rjsquirrel Dec 2015 #18

We had a beautiful service for Tyler, who took his own life in October ... Scuba Dec 2015 #16

Suicide is not always caused by rjsquirrel Dec 2015 #19

I did not mean to suggest that it was. In fact, my opinion is that it's a human right ... Scuba Dec 2015 #20

We agree about that rjsquirrel Dec 2015 #25

I'm with you, Scuba. I decided a long time ago I would not linger for years. ladyVet Dec 2015 #38

Missed that thread, sorry to hear about that. joshcryer Dec 2015 #21

How sad. You gave her good advice. Vinca Dec 2015 #17

Very sad, I agre, your advice was exceptional. Stuart G Dec 2015 #22

The first funeral I remember was my paternal grandfather's. Blus4u Dec 2015 #23

the service is really for the survivors, so she should karynnj Dec 2015 #24

My sister committed suicide this year 2naSalit Dec 2015 #26

so sorry annabanana Dec 2015 #35

Thanks... 2naSalit Dec 2015 #43

My condolensces to your friend nadinbrzezinski Dec 2015 #28

I don't think any church itcfish Dec 2015 #30

I've been struggling to come up with an appropriate response to this thread all day Victor_c3 Dec 2015 #31

Hoping for peace for you. PassingFair Dec 2015 #33

I don't know what to say to you! itcfish Dec 2015 #34

Hey, if u ever want someone to talk to, PM me for KingCharlemagne Dec 2015 #42

One thing to keep in mind about funerals/memorial services -- for ANYBODY... markpkessinger Dec 2015 #32

So sorry to hear this. But she is not alone. ucrdem Dec 2015 #36

thank you all demtenjeep Dec 2015 #37

This message was self-deleted by its author polly7 Dec 2015 #39

holding your friend in thought and prayers. having lost several friends to suicide myself, niyad Dec 2015 #40