General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: Great Non-Medical Reasons To Legalize Weed [View all]Egalitarian Thug
(12,448 posts)person I've encountered with this issue. You're also not the first person I've met that internalized the blame, but would it make a difference if it was some other substance that you found yourself unable to stay away from?
Do you toke because you are compelled to toke, or do you toke because it allows you to ignore the fact that you are living a life that does not satisfy you?
One of the things that pot does to most people is to change their perspective and that can change priorities. You think of things like, "I am getting up and spending my entire day doing something I don't enjoy for very little money to realize somebody else's dream". And once you've had that thought it makes continuing your routine that much harder, so you smoke to ease the discomfort, which triggers the thinking, which makes it harder, which triggers the desire, which...
I have no ambition when I toke with regularity, I really just don't care to work very hard at something which is of no interest or challenge to me. That's just a fact. So when I'm readying a new project, I stop toking for a week or two in preparation. That gets my brain back into overdrive mode and I can quickly finish the essential planning and prep, assign tasks, prioritize personnel, tools, & supplies, and so on. I collect the check(s) and go back to enjoying my short life until I have start again.
Pot keeps me from going absolutely insane from living in this totally sick and twisted world that I had nothing to do with creating nor any desire to participate in. Does that sound familiar?