Suppose a group has declared a "safe space" on public property or a place of public accommodation

[OneGrassRoot]

141. Re: campus housing...

While I believe classrooms and other spaces on campus should be integrated in order to have a wide range of perspectives and voices and inclusivity, I feel differently about housing.

I view where we sleep and retreat to as a sanctuary; that it SHOULD be a sanctuary. I may not feel safe in my neighborhood because a neighbor wants me to die, and it is not a safe space because I can't take a walk in my neighborhood without the potential of an encounter, but if I stay inside my home, I feel pretty safe. Everyone should have a home where they feel safe; too many don't.

If I were an able-bodied student, I would have no problem with designated housing only for those with physical disabilities, for example. For one thing, it is voluntary and not all students who deal with physical limitations would want to live in such housing. Some students with disabilities would want to live with people of varying physical abilities. We all have different personalities and life experiences.

I would not feel slighted because I COULDN'T live there. It makes no sense to me why I would WANT to live there, since I respect the need for a sanctuary and since I don't share their life experience. And, it's precisely because able-bodied persons don't experience what they experience 24/7 that I can understand some may want a break from educating abled-bodied people.

Just because I don't live with someone facing this particular struggle doesn't mean I won't be around them. I know I will likely encounter them in class and other places on campus and off. I can still broaden my perspective and learn to empathize, and hopefully develop meaningful relationships. It doesn't require literally living together to develop true friendship.

And it doesn't mean that because I'm excluded from that housing I and other able-bodied persons are perceived as bullies or ableists. Only people who are very sensitive and take everything personally would think that way.

The same holds true for all marginalized or oppressed groups and the individuals who are members of those groups.

I respect that black people may want their own living space because they don't want to be explaining or defending cultural stuff or their collective history to white people 24/7. And that they'd like a break from the inevitable insults and demeaning comments made by well-meaning white people during the course of their day who don't realize what they say or do is dehumanizing people of color.

I wouldn't interpret being excluded from their housing as meaning that all white people are dangerous racists.

I respect that Latinos may want their own living space because they don't want to be explaining or defending their cultural stuff or to non-Latinos 24/7. And that they'd like a break from the inevitable insults and demeaning comments made by well-meaning non-Latinos during the course of their day who don't realize what they say or do is dehumanizing all Latinos.

I wouldn't interpret being excluded from their housing as meaning that all non-Latinos are nationalistic bigots.

I respect that those in the LGBTQ community may want their own living space because they don't want to deal with the inevitable awkwardness (or worse, the bullying) that comes with intimate living situations (sharing sleeping quarters, sharing showers, etc), and don't want to be educating heterosexual and cisgender persons 24/7.

I respect separate male housing, female housing and coed and otherwise fully integrated housing. When possible, choice is a wonderful thing when people have been sexually abused or bullied in other ways throughout their lives -- as individuals and as part of a group of humans -- and need a sanctuary to escape to some degree (because it would be rare to feel FULLY emotionally or physically safe).

Just because it can get complicated to address diverse needs and just because there may be gray areas doesn't mean that the underlying premise for something -- in this case safe spaces, specifically in the form of housing -- isn't valid and vitally important.


EDIT TO ADD: Note that I didn't include any obvious racist attacks in my examples of why I respect the need for safe spaces. There's no need for that to occur for people to need space to breathe and BE, away from the POTENTIAL of that (racism, bigotry) and because there's a need for a break from the daily, seemingly more benign interactions which are like knife cuts for people in marginalized groups.