I wept today....

[Jarqui]

65. I never saw action but a number in our family did.

We considered ourselves "lucky" as a family. They all got wounded but somehow, they all made it home when so many they served with did not. A few eventually died of their wounds.

As a young boy, I developed an unusual bond with one of them. It was the only time in my life when I could say "we knew each other without speaking". I stuck to him like glue and we hardly ever said a word to each other. There was just immense comfort to be in each other's company. But it was far too brief. He'd been away for decades. He visited. We bonded. And he left and never came back. I wanted to go after him but my parents wouldn't allow it.

After he left, I started on a journey to try to find out what happened to him. I was relentless. That journey started around 1964. I researched, talked with family and traced his life and military activity. That journey ended about two months ago at a war museum with an officer specialized in PTSD reviewing his history and records. He fought the entire war for four plus years in a number of horrific situations. The intriguing thing for the military (which kind of bothered me) was because he was so messed up with classic PTSD, they wanted to understand why he hadn't killed himself when most others that badly messed up had.

The answer for me that they readily accepted was quite simple. His father had died in a farming accident when he was eight. He was a naturally protective person. He became the "man" of the family, quit school and got a job to support his mother, little brother and sister - at 8 years old. During his military service, he sent his pay home to take care of his mother and sister. And that's what he did when he went to live in the woods for 45 years after the war with this nasty undiagnosed and at the time, not treatable case of PTSD. The love for his mother and sister kept him going when he determined he was too mentally unfit with PTSD to live in society with people.

I asked the officer specialized in PTSD what I should tell family members about his service. He said (contrary to Donald Trump) "tell them he was one tough son of a bitch".

I'd add this about PTSD: it's a pretty bad wound for family members to endure when a loved one is afflicted with it. It's haunted me much of my life and caused considerable emotional pain.

If I'd seen Donald Trump yesterday, I might be arrested by the Secret Service. I wanted to punch him in the face and lay him out. You've heard it like a broken record: this man is so ignorant, he has no business being commander in chief of the men and women in the military. I was a Bernie supporter and I flat out am no fan of Hillary but she's a heck of a lot better alternative to this asshole.