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In reply to the discussion: I wept today.... [View all]

Jarqui

(10,434 posts)
65. I never saw action but a number in our family did.
Tue Oct 4, 2016, 09:37 PM
Oct 2016

We considered ourselves "lucky" as a family. They all got wounded but somehow, they all made it home when so many they served with did not. A few eventually died of their wounds.

As a young boy, I developed an unusual bond with one of them. It was the only time in my life when I could say "we knew each other without speaking". I stuck to him like glue and we hardly ever said a word to each other. There was just immense comfort to be in each other's company. But it was far too brief. He'd been away for decades. He visited. We bonded. And he left and never came back. I wanted to go after him but my parents wouldn't allow it.

After he left, I started on a journey to try to find out what happened to him. I was relentless. That journey started around 1964. I researched, talked with family and traced his life and military activity. That journey ended about two months ago at a war museum with an officer specialized in PTSD reviewing his history and records. He fought the entire war for four plus years in a number of horrific situations. The intriguing thing for the military (which kind of bothered me) was because he was so messed up with classic PTSD, they wanted to understand why he hadn't killed himself when most others that badly messed up had.

The answer for me that they readily accepted was quite simple. His father had died in a farming accident when he was eight. He was a naturally protective person. He became the "man" of the family, quit school and got a job to support his mother, little brother and sister - at 8 years old. During his military service, he sent his pay home to take care of his mother and sister. And that's what he did when he went to live in the woods for 45 years after the war with this nasty undiagnosed and at the time, not treatable case of PTSD. The love for his mother and sister kept him going when he determined he was too mentally unfit with PTSD to live in society with people.

I asked the officer specialized in PTSD what I should tell family members about his service. He said (contrary to Donald Trump) "tell them he was one tough son of a bitch".

I'd add this about PTSD: it's a pretty bad wound for family members to endure when a loved one is afflicted with it. It's haunted me much of my life and caused considerable emotional pain.

If I'd seen Donald Trump yesterday, I might be arrested by the Secret Service. I wanted to punch him in the face and lay him out. You've heard it like a broken record: this man is so ignorant, he has no business being commander in chief of the men and women in the military. I was a Bernie supporter and I flat out am no fan of Hillary but she's a heck of a lot better alternative to this asshole.

I wept today.... [View all] jaysunb Oct 2016 OP
I very much appreciate you sharing this with us. ZombieHorde Oct 2016 #1
Clueless Roy Rolling Oct 2016 #42
They, and you, are not weak. Never. Hekate Oct 2016 #2
Thank you so much for telling your important story. apcalc Oct 2016 #3
It's been a rough day pinboy3niner Oct 2016 #4
Yes Sir (crisp salute) :) n/t jaysunb Oct 2016 #6
I'm sorry it's been a tough day my friend steve2470 Oct 2016 #59
Donald Trump evaded military service Skittles Oct 2016 #5
Actually, we need to shut him the fuck up....nt Wounded Bear Oct 2016 #37
Yet he and his supporters can't wait to get into the next war. Dark n Stormy Knight Oct 2016 #55
My dear jaysunb... CaliforniaPeggy Oct 2016 #7
and yet so many vets support the maggot. MFM008 Oct 2016 #8
... Lochloosa Oct 2016 #41
And he'll never understand because of many reasons. ffr Oct 2016 #9
I did, too. yewberry Oct 2016 #10
+1 n/t jaysunb Oct 2016 #11
I'm guessing you're talking about AmeriCorps when you mention your national service? Victor_c3 Oct 2016 #19
If its any solace, you're not alone in wanting to wear The Donald like a pair of rubber boots. Hugin Oct 2016 #12
That is a very good sign Sherman A1 Oct 2016 #22
I was enraged when he attacked McCain. Missn-Hitch Oct 2016 #13
That bastard will get his. nt msanthrope Oct 2016 #14
in solidarity with you and all veterans! steve2470 Oct 2016 #15
I'm There With You queentonic Oct 2016 #16
Maybe we should go easy on "The Donald" - after all colorado_ufo Oct 2016 #17
Good point Victor_c3 Oct 2016 #20
I wonder if that old vet regrets his gift lunatica Oct 2016 #31
Trump likes to talk tough, but he's not. He's a fucking jody straight out of central casting. Tactical Peek Oct 2016 #18
Wow, nicely put by Malcom Nance Victor_c3 Oct 2016 #21
Don't vote Stupid!!! Historic NY Oct 2016 #27
thanks for that link lunatica Oct 2016 #33
Donald Trump is ignorant and insensitive Martin Eden Oct 2016 #23
Exactly treestar Oct 2016 #24
I wept too. yellerpup Oct 2016 #25
thank you for your sevice, I was in the USAF 1971-1975 beachbum bob Oct 2016 #26
My dad was a Marine Raider, 1st Marine Division. Lied about his age &joined on December 8, 1941 catbyte Oct 2016 #28
My Dad was Army, in for eight months before Pearl Harbor, Dem2theMax Oct 2016 #68
+1 n/t jaysunb Oct 2016 #70
Thank you for sharing this mcar Oct 2016 #29
I am not a vet, but I want to go out and have a good cry. Stonepounder Oct 2016 #30
I thank you for sharing this. I too weep. classof56 Oct 2016 #32
you are strength! nt retrowire Oct 2016 #34
It used to be "battle fatigue" annabanana Oct 2016 #35
Another blunt way of putting it. WHEN CRABS ROAR Oct 2016 #46
Thanks for the post Jaysnub The Polack MSgt Oct 2016 #36
Thank you for your service, and the service of your grandson. hamsterjill Oct 2016 #38
I am sorry. Lifelong Protester Oct 2016 #39
k&r saidsimplesimon Oct 2016 #40
trump would have no idea or understand what you are talking about Motley13 Oct 2016 #43
I too was in Vietnam jimmil Oct 2016 #44
I cried for my Dad a Chief Petty Officer and rbrnmw Oct 2016 #45
((jaysun)) blm Oct 2016 #47
That creature has no soul and I don't write this lightly. sarge43 Oct 2016 #48
+1. n/t jaysunb Oct 2016 #49
Thank you for this post. I was in Vietnam Dec 66 to Dec 67 Glorfindel Oct 2016 #50
Asking for help vlyons Oct 2016 #51
Trump says things like that and I openly wonder about his sanity. Moostache Oct 2016 #52
Thank you for your service Sir - over 50 years ago, so may men sent into harms way - asiliveandbreathe Oct 2016 #53
Very powerful hibbing Oct 2016 #54
I am a combat vet diagnosed with PTSD The Wizard Oct 2016 #56
Yup....n/t jaysunb Oct 2016 #58
Thank you. Bless your heart and your Grandson's. Raster Oct 2016 #57
I retweeted your message, hopefully this will help steve2470 Oct 2016 #60
My heart goes out to everyone that was coerced into the armchair warrior's battles erronis Oct 2016 #61
I never served, but I, too, would like to put my foot up his sorry ass! calimary Oct 2016 #62
I, Too Am A titanicdave Oct 2016 #63
I'm the son of a Vietnam veteran. cab67 Oct 2016 #64
I never saw action but a number in our family did. Jarqui Oct 2016 #65
Thank you for your service! (nfm) SunDrop23 Oct 2016 #66
K&R Solly Mack Oct 2016 #67
Google ngram Urchin Oct 2016 #69
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