General Discussion

kurtzapril4

(1,353 posts)

45. My mother was great

Wed Jun 20, 2012, 11:32 AM

Jun 2012

My dad was just "there." Not much input except for using the belt and cleaning our fingernails with a pocketknife.

We got along better as we got older. He started to develop a sense of humour. I told him I loved him once, 30 years ago. He never, ever said it. He reaped what he sowed.

One of the last things he ever did or said to me, was, on his deathbed, he kicked me out of the hospital room because "The cops are chasing you because you own too many businesses, and you are a crimal. Walk out of that door and keep walking."

I don't own any businesses. I was able to be there with him because I'm un-employed. My three half-brothers never showed up, they were too "busy." They are all retired.

He died on December 22, 2010. His 95th birthday.

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Father's Day reflection from a daughter of domestic abuse [View all] HockeyMom Jun 2012 OP

Thank you for this. puts things into perspctive in a good way. robinlynne Jun 2012 #1

Glad you were able to forgive him. eom tawadi Jun 2012 #2

My father left my mother with 5 kids and never came back. I saw him a few times before he libinnyandia Jun 2012 #3

My Grandma was a Widow HockeyMom Jun 2012 #6

. Mojorabbit Jun 2012 #4

I'm balling..... a kennedy Jun 2012 #5

My dear HockeyMom... CaliforniaPeggy Jun 2012 #7

So glad you were able to forgive him. siligut Jun 2012 #8

Thanks for sharing that lunatica Jun 2012 #9

Beautiful post, HockeyMom pinboy3niner Jun 2012 #10

OMG, I got tears in my eyes from reading that! Odin2005 Jun 2012 #11

I got a glimpse of the real man my Dad was HockeyMom Jun 2012 #12

Your post brought a real tear to my eye. Great sentiment and good writing. kayakjohnny Jun 2012 #13

Thank you for this story. I'm bawling too. LiberalLoner Jun 2012 #14

Seriously made me tear up a little there Tommykun Jun 2012 #15

''Infinite unconditional love is the only truth. Everything else is illusion.'' - K&R n/t DeSwiss Jun 2012 #16

... RainDog Jun 2012 #17

I don't know if my dad physically abused my mother cali Jun 2012 #18

Forgiveness is hard when the person who needs the forgiveness won't change or ask for it mythology Jun 2012 #19

I don't blame you. Just because you share DNA with somebody doesn't mean you have to have them in raccoon Jun 2012 #32

This. redqueen Jun 2012 #34

Same situation I faced with my mom. Though truedelphi Jun 2012 #38

I don't know if this has any relevance for you quakerboy Jun 2012 #41

thank you. cali Jun 2012 #43

My dear friend, you did what you had to do Demeter Jun 2012 #20

Thanks. mmonk Jun 2012 #21

You are able to live with yourself as a result of this and not carry it forward. glinda Jun 2012 #22

#43 Thank you Hockey Mom ManyShadesOf Jun 2012 #23

Thanks for posting. My father was a violent alcoholic too. raccoon Jun 2012 #24

That is very inspirational... CoffeeCat Jun 2012 #25

"Vets were not given counseling" I wonder if this was the real problem. Zalatix Jun 2012 #26

This! SaB2012 Jun 2012 #27

I've always wondered if things would be different if men were allowed to talk malaise Jun 2012 #28

I don't know how much talking would help quakerboy Jun 2012 #42

Thank you for sharing. lapislzi Jun 2012 #29

I'm glad things worked out as well as they did; snot Jun 2012 #30

I dont know my dad Garion_55 Jun 2012 #31

I'm so sorry to hear about that. AverageJoe90 Jun 2012 #33

+1 JDPriestly Jun 2012 #35

Thank you so much for sharing libodem Jun 2012 #36

I had super lousy parents...super grand in-laws. Tikki Jun 2012 #37

Thank you to my fellow DUers HockeyMom Jun 2012 #39

Thanks for sharing this politicasista Jun 2012 #40

Right there with you... Javaman Jun 2012 #44

My mother was great kurtzapril4 Jun 2012 #45