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nolabear

(43,850 posts)

42. The answer lies in every "they."

Mon Feb 27, 2017, 12:52 PM

Feb 2017

I know "they" do inexplicable things. I know "they" do horrible things. But from their perspective, no matter what "we" think of them, they are not being seen as the complete people they are even as they objectify "others" and don't see them as the complete people they are.

Believe it or not, there are common threads that underlie us all, having to do with the deep need to be accepted and valued for who we are. The layers built on top of that when we are shamed or vilified are incredibly complex and take Herculean efforts to overcome. The most natural thing is to run to those who look and act the most like you and value them, thereby valuing yourself. We all do it, particularly when we are afraid, exhausted, and our lives' meaning is challenged. It has the power now to destroy us all. And all of us have to reach across in some SAFE way to change it. Emphasis on SAFE, because those layers are dangerous as hell.

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Why are the deplorables so prone to mean-spiritedness just for the sake of being mean? [View all] butdiduvote Feb 2017 OP

I think it's an abusive mentality Chiquitita Feb 2017 #1

Agree. Same dynamic as domestic abuse or many other kinds of abuse. Amaryllis Feb 2017 #9

Sorry, but it's far more complex, and for most the OP is wrong. Hortensis Feb 2017 #19

They have gigantic amygdalas, so much fear that they don't give a crap about anybody else. lagomorph777 Feb 2017 #22

Conservative altruism extends to smaller groups, Hortensis Feb 2017 #43

Definitely it is! Well said! Some just love hatred, it's the essence of their being and what RKP5637 Feb 2017 #30

It's very puzzling, and it's become worse over the last 20-30 years. The Velveteen Ocelot Feb 2017 #2

I think AM hate radio has a lot to do with it. Initech Feb 2017 #6

Yes, the radio show hosts are incredibly nasty Mariana Feb 2017 #8

That and cable news. We used to all get the same news before the internet. Amaryllis Feb 2017 #10

Hate radio. CrispyQ Feb 2017 #38

You are correct, Crispy. musette_sf Feb 2017 #44

In my memory it shifted in a big way toward mean-spiritedness as a badge of honor with Gingrich JudyM Feb 2017 #39

Authoritarians are into punishment. KittyWampus Feb 2017 #3

Just so long as the authoritarians themselves aren't being punished. meow2u3 Feb 2017 #5

Their leader hasn't told them no. Initech Feb 2017 #4

I believe that has to do with intimidation RickHworth Feb 2017 #7

It's a sick manifestation Cirque du So-What Feb 2017 #11

Right on target! raccoon Feb 2017 #16

"Brainwashing: The Science of Thought Control" GeoWilliam750 Feb 2017 #12

because they think that's how "winners" act. TeamPooka Feb 2017 #13

They've been influenced to give up empathy by seeing others as The Other lostnfound Feb 2017 #14

part of it has to do with Trump's own failures JI7 Feb 2017 #15

Trump was just speaking for them radical noodle Feb 2017 #41

Because they assume everyone is just like them. Dulcinea Feb 2017 #17

Greed Bettie Feb 2017 #18

Spot on... Docreed2003 Feb 2017 #34

Revenge! That is what I read in all the comments. leftyladyfrommo Feb 2017 #20

I am working on a paper now called "The Age of Revenge Politics" RadiationTherapy Feb 2017 #36

there are two types of people in the world... Javaman Feb 2017 #21

Yep. Dulcinea Feb 2017 #24

Because that is WHO they are and Trump told them who HE was, it's that simple. NotThisTime Feb 2017 #23

Amazingly Proud Liberal Dem Feb 2017 #26

I know, right Proud Liberal Dem Feb 2017 #25

My hypothesis is d_r Feb 2017 #27

It's a learned behavior. kentuck Feb 2017 #28

Simply put. And accurate. Kimchijeon Feb 2017 #40

It's in their unpleasant souls: Dem2 Feb 2017 #29

They thrive on it Lotusflower70 Feb 2017 #31

They feel free to unleash their inner demons Jake Stern Feb 2017 #32

They go out the ego door of compensation of cruelty. vlyons Feb 2017 #33

I have three Trump trolls in my FB collective & the two religious ones are the meanest. CrispyQ Feb 2017 #35

They're chronically angry. Aristus Feb 2017 #37

The answer lies in every "they." nolabear Feb 2017 #42

Because that's partly what makes them conservatives. OnionPatch Feb 2017 #45