A breach of trust (in our home)...(Update)

[Ilsa]

59. I'm so sorry this happened to you. From my own

experience, I'd recommend that you let him face the system. Let the judge grant mercy if it is warranted. It might be exactly what he needs to get his life in order, maybe save his life or that of someone close to him.

The best thing I did a number of years ago was to turn in a trusted family member who violated that trust. This person robbed me while we were doing a project together, one in which I was giving him half of the net profits, just because he was family. Stole several thousand dollars in property from me and my husband, including something very sentimental, and hocked it all for drug money. The felony created a legal history on him that meant that if he ever did something even more stupid, he'd be locked up longer. The thing is, other family members had enabled him for years in his criminal behavior. This episode laid the groundwork. The next attempt really cost him, and that was when he started straightening up. He still has a long way to go, and he has not even attempted to make amends, but we all feel better that he is apparently living a cleaner life.

I wish you and your wife peace of mind. Some people need different, harsher incentives to do the right thing, and you can't change that about him.