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(22,976 posts)
4. "I won by the biggest electoral college landslide in history."
Fri Mar 24, 2017, 04:19 PM
Mar 2017

"It was a huge win, I'm told. But I inherited a mess, a bigger mess than I even imagined. It's so messy that we're busy cleaning that up. You know, nobody said I'd get to 270. But we got, what? 350? 360? Huge win. Never wanted to do healthcare anyway. That's it, I'm heading to the Southern White House. We were calling it the Winter White House, but now winter's over, and 'Southern White House' sounds so much better, doesn't it? Oh, and I'm the president, and you're not."

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