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Nevernose

(13,081 posts)
44. Rape might be a harsh term
Mon Oct 30, 2017, 01:51 AM
Oct 2017

And perhaps he just made an awkward pass, one which was immediately icky and quickly rebuffed. Those hypotheticals leave out the context.

This wasn’t a young-love, high school senior and her freshman love interest. 18 and 14 is icky and wrong and technically illegal, but hardly worthy ruining people’s lives over. Those are kids that need to be grounded.

From the admittedly brief description we got from both participants, my most generous interpretation from hearing both (admittedly abridged) side’s is that Spacey spent months grooming this kid in a textbook way. Found a kid who would be allowed to spend time alone with an older man, assumed role of caring mentor, provided opportunities to test boundaries with the frequent parties, stick-and-carrot approach to the kid’s career. Just culminated in a way that didn’t work out for him.

He didn’t push it, which is some small saving grace, but a 26 year Old should never have developed that sort of relationship with a 14 year old at all.

To sum up: it’s not a drunken pass thirty years ago that bothers me, it’s the refusal to own it any form, and it’s the missing context of the months seducing an underage kid.

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You know more stories will now come out. Another open secret explodes in the media... bettyellen Oct 2017 #1
Wow Catherine Vincent Oct 2017 #2
Sometimes it feels like there's very limited True Dough Oct 2017 #3
The second paragraph could have started with... bluepen Oct 2017 #4
Rolling my gay eyes so hard at the second paragraph. SaschaHM Oct 2017 #5
Where is the dragging in paragraph 2? WinkyDink Oct 2017 #7
That's kind of what I was thinking Lotusflower70 Oct 2017 #9
I think he didnt want speculation forgotmylogin Oct 2017 #18
Got that right. Alice11111 Oct 2017 #19
Hear, hear. I applaud Spacey for responding quickly and honestly. secondwind Oct 2017 #49
The I don't remember / If I did it....weasel words and I do no respect it at all. I don't believe he Demsrule86 Oct 2017 #63
That WAS 30 years ago. I can see not remembering everything from that long ago, esp if drunk. Honeycombe8 Oct 2017 #78
What he did was obviously wrong. But 30+ years ago was in the 80's. It's easy to forget pnwmom Oct 2017 #17
I don't need a gay history lesson. I also don't need a 40+ year old man who's sexuality SaschaHM Oct 2017 #25
He isn't using it as an excuse for anything TODAY. He's talking about something in the 80's pnwmom Oct 2017 #26
Well said. OnDoutside Oct 2017 #47
Bravo secondwind Oct 2017 #50
I disagree. He attacked a fourteen year old child. No excuses. yardwork Oct 2017 #53
No kidding. What a bunch of horseshit. Dave Starsky Oct 2017 #55
Thank you. yardwork Oct 2017 #56
I've seen a photo of the kid now and I agree -- this wasn't a mistake of not being able to tell pnwmom Oct 2017 #73
Exactly -- molesting minors wasn't okay then, either obamanut2012 Oct 2017 #59
We don't know that for a fact. He did not admit to that. He said he doesn't remember... Honeycombe8 Oct 2017 #79
"He couldn't face himself sober, so he did stupid things while drunk." oberliner Oct 2017 #70
Not related to being gay, or, as he says, loving men or women. Alice11111 Oct 2017 #27
If he was drunk he would have been even less able to judge a teenager's age than when sober. pnwmom Oct 2017 #33
I usually agree with you. On this one, he only expressed regret Alice11111 Oct 2017 #35
" But society had driven him into the closet and alcohol helped him get out" SaschaHM Oct 2017 #38
He described it as "deeply inappropriate drunken behavior." So that's the "something" pnwmom Oct 2017 #39
He attacked a child. That's a crime. Being gay or drunk is not an excuse. yardwork Oct 2017 #57
Spot on. Alice11111 Oct 2017 #90
Oh, the horrors of being gay in the NY theater scene in the 80s... AngryAmish Oct 2017 #65
Seriously. As a matter of fact, come to think of it, even I was part of the 1980s NY theatre scene. yardwork Oct 2017 #67
How could you prevent yourself from trying to get with a barely teenager? AngryAmish Oct 2017 #71
I know, right? I can't believe what I'm reading here. yardwork Oct 2017 #74
Here's what Anthony Rapp looked like at the time oberliner Oct 2017 #40
I presume he knew the teenager's age prior to getting drunk. LisaL Oct 2017 #41
He didn't admit to it. He said he doesn't remember, & offered a possible excuse for why he doesn't. Honeycombe8 Oct 2017 #80
Please remember that the kid malaise Oct 2017 #51
Rapp is courageous to come forward now!!! Alice11111 Oct 2017 #91
Attacking a fourteen year old is not acceptable in the context of being gay. It's wrong. yardwork Oct 2017 #52
I don't need a history lesson either. moriah Oct 2017 #75
He also came out in an intreview like 15 years ago obamanut2012 Oct 2017 #58
I didn't know... shanti Oct 2017 #81
We choose who we love which is a good thing and not the same thing as preying Demsrule86 Oct 2017 #62
Dan Savage has been ripping Spacey for trying to make it a coming out issue instead of a anneboleyn Oct 2017 #76
he honestly doesn't remember whether he initiated a sexual encounter with a 14 year old boy? mnmoderatedem Oct 2017 #6
Reads like an admission to me BainsBane Oct 2017 #8
No shit! Well stated. Alice11111 Oct 2017 #29
I'm guessing a lot of this was involved. Initech Oct 2017 #11
Alcohol allows you to be your true self with an excuse sarah FAILIN Oct 2017 #15
I'll bet if you were molesting kids 30 years ago... Dave Starsky Oct 2017 #60
Bingo. yardwork Oct 2017 #68
he is trying to excuse himself by saying he was drunk so anything that happened JI7 Oct 2017 #13
I dont know about that FreeState Oct 2017 #20
what if there are accusations in the last 15 years or so ? JI7 Oct 2017 #24
Why speculate until that happens? This incident took place in the 80's. pnwmom Oct 2017 #28
i'm not speculating on the specific case but i'm trying to see where the poster would the time JI7 Oct 2017 #37
I remember that era well. pnwmom Oct 2017 #30
Its hard to explain to people FreeState Oct 2017 #34
Even 30 years ago was a world away from the freedom gay people OnDoutside Oct 2017 #48
My dad was bi, and had the added trauma... moriah Oct 2017 #85
I wasn't trying to excuse what he did, which isn't excusable. pnwmom Oct 2017 #86
30 years ago this was "normal" behavior. joshcryer Oct 2017 #16
Attacking a fourteen year old is NEVER normal. yardwork Oct 2017 #54
In the 1980's Sgent Oct 2017 #83
Oh really? Got any evidence for that? This happened in New York. yardwork Oct 2017 #87
No it wasn't, all but three states were above 15 years of age by 1920 FreeState Oct 2017 #92
If he was blackout drunk, perhaps not. moriah Oct 2017 #77
........... alittlelark Oct 2017 #10
Ive got perfect recall of my rape attempts Nevernose Oct 2017 #12
Simply and well stated. Alice11111 Oct 2017 #31
How do you know this was a rape attempt? He certainly tried to start something, pnwmom Oct 2017 #36
Rape might be a harsh term Nevernose Oct 2017 #44
Yeah, I hadn't heard anything about months of grooming. I'd read something about pnwmom Oct 2017 #46
There's a forum somewhere on these interwebs that bathroommonkey76 Oct 2017 #14
Yes there have been stories about him for years More_Cowbell Oct 2017 #22
The forum I'm talking about goes into detail about those "assaults" lol bathroommonkey76 Oct 2017 #23
The mispresented term here seems to be defacto7 Oct 2017 #21
What a glorious distinction Alice11111 Oct 2017 #32
A psychological distinction all the same. defacto7 Oct 2017 #42
As a lawyer, yeah, but for the victim, it is still the most Alice11111 Oct 2017 #43
He did it. And there are others. Tatiana Oct 2017 #45
I never knew this. It makes me sad...anyone see Fun Home about a closeted Demsrule86 Oct 2017 #61
This statement enrages me dsc Oct 2017 #64
This lesbian who was an adult during the 1980s agrees. yardwork Oct 2017 #69
Yup. ismnotwasm Oct 2017 #72
It wasn't an attack, really. He made a move on him. When the 14yr old said no, that was it. Honeycombe8 Oct 2017 #82
If you think that's "making a move" then I suggest you check yourself. yardwork Oct 2017 #88
The 14 year old had to push Spacey off of him. Kaleva Oct 2017 #93
... demmiblue Oct 2017 #66
He all but admitted to sexually assaulting a minor LittleBlue Oct 2017 #84
It's too bad... doodsaq Oct 2017 #89
"I choose now to live as a gay man" snooper2 Oct 2017 #94
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