She Doesnt Owe Anyone a Hug. Not Even at the Holidays

[MineralMan]

36. My first generation nieces and nephews grew up calling me

"Uncle Freak," reflecting my hippie appearance, and attitudes. Now, their children call me that. I always have a smile for them and maybe a story that will make them laugh. I enjoy being "Uncle Freak." At the same time, I'm often the one both generations tell about things that are bothering them or worrying them. That's because I don't make judgments and often have some advice that will help.

Those twins live now in North Carolina and I don't see them very often. This last time was on the occasion of their grandfather's (my brother) death. It was a strange time for everyone. Add to that their change in status and the transitional life phase that they're in, and all bets are off, really.

Things are never the same as they were at a previous time. My goal is always to have people be comfortable with me. So, I leave things to them when it comes to whatever relationship we have. I don't know what they're thinking about, what has recently happened in their lives, or their current mood. So, I let them decide what they want at any particular moment.

When it comes to displaying affection physically, I'm not proactive, but reactive. It's not my decision to make, I believe. Life's complicated.