Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News Editorials & Other Articles General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

LiberalLovinLug

(14,680 posts)
77. Its good to hear a response like this
Mon Dec 11, 2017, 04:49 PM
Dec 2017

We should be debating this in all its nuance.

Frankly(!) I'm surprised (and encouraged) at the overwhelming support of Franken on DU. But its good to hear this point of view. I say this as someone who has had posts hidden for daring to go against the tide of certain threads. So I applaud your bravery.

But while I do agree, even though I have no real experience as a victim, only what I know from a past girlfriend who was VERY sensitive based on abuse as a young person from her father, that someone who has experienced actual physical sexual abuse, probably would cringe and even be mentally triggered if there were ANY kind of real or perceived uninvited touching, like a hand slipping a little low on the back while taking a picture, I think there must be room for nuance and an understanding that while there are some females (or males) that are triggered by even a hand a little low around a waist, that there must be some form of intent by the person accused in order for there to be a crime.

That of course there are evil men that rape and abuse, and they KNOW that "boundary violating techniques" are all a part of their depraved predatory strategy But surely there must be some form of innocent before proven guilty, especially in cases where the accused has never had any reported history of this, and the accusations are spurious and there is more evidence of collusion than there is any evidence of any kind of sexual abuse beyond a rude photo on a comedy tour.

You say "if Binkie tells us adult women that we shouldn't make such a fuss about being patted on our behind without our consent, why should the 14-year old rape victim think that Binkie will believe her or him when they tell their story?"

....There are layers to that. I understand where you are coming from there, that you alert us to the danger of a slippery slope where if we dismiss more minor sexual misconduct, and draw a line, that that line could be moved or clouded.
But IMO, we simply must trust that we are adult enough, or smart enough, as a majority, to define that line. As a society we do it when we delineate between "murder" and "manslaughter" for instance. We may get it wrong at times when that line is just under or just over. But there must be SOME semblance of trust in the majorities definitions or we are lost, we are not a Democracy. That when you reason that Binkie (and others here) by not making a fuss about being patted on our behind are diminishing the accusations by a rape victim, you are pointing out, that they are very different extremes. So you are essentially arguing against your initial premise...that its all the same thing (to some women).

But it is such an emotionally charged subject, and in fact, it is one of the rare instances in crime and law and order that emotions SHOULD be a factor in a decision. That is what makes this kind of debate so charged. Because, like my past girlfriend, I can see first hand how women (and some men) never 'get over it' and that should be acknowledged and respected, but IMO the line must be drawn somewhere, and we must trust our justice system made up of laws we as a society have honed through centuries, as defined by a majority of citizens, to draw that line for us.

And i feel that in Franken's case, not only was he not tried in a court of law, he WAS tried and sentenced, for political reasons, by his own peers. They have decided that there is no line. And by defining their position as such, Trump, Moore, and others can use that conclusion to whitewash their own behaviour. And that is far more dangerous than erasing any clear standards by only taking into consideration one segment of society, those who were more violently assaulted, made up of mostly women, that may be adversely triggered by even a hand around their waist. Cold though that may sound to any former sexual assault victim. But like I said, I respect and appreciate your post.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Nobody disputes that there's a difference in the gravity of the two actions... brooklynite Dec 2017 #1
My point exactly. The line is being moved to a point that is no longer remotely sane. nt Binkie The Clown Dec 2017 #2
Exactly. When everything is over the line, mn9driver Dec 2017 #4
Roy Moore has benefitted heavily customerserviceguy Dec 2017 #57
going thru kg facebook...looks us nobodie voters agree with you binkie questionseverything Dec 2017 #5
it just goes on and on..by tomorrow they will prob have it "cleaned up" questionseverything Dec 2017 #8
Hey! I know one of those posters! TheDebbieDee Dec 2017 #55
Wow, that's pretty harsh! InAbLuEsTaTe Dec 2017 #45
lotta men accusing her of grabbing their buns too questionseverything Dec 2017 #47
And they got it gravely wrong Egnever Dec 2017 #3
If social media is the new courtroom we are all screwed. airmid Dec 2017 #6
Exactly right Egnever Dec 2017 #7
For sure. LisaL Dec 2017 #9
And who gave them the authority ... NanceGreggs Dec 2017 #10
I have the same problem with them deciding to kick Franken out. LisaL Dec 2017 #12
Since this occurred I've been thinking about Minnesota Democrats. BadgerMom Dec 2017 #44
I'm a Minnesota Democrat geardaddy Dec 2017 #63
Schumer, their party boss, gave them his endorsement and joined their chorus. Let's not forget. ancianita Dec 2017 #14
Schumer's also on board with Jerusalem being treated as Israel's capital by Trump. BadgerMom Dec 2017 #42
A sad, important sidebar, but yes, both define the Democratic establishment. ancianita Dec 2017 #46
I agree. Can there not treestar Dec 2017 #48
And can there not be ... NanceGreggs Dec 2017 #51
All the penalties are informal. Igel Dec 2017 #53
Franken was called upon ... NanceGreggs Dec 2017 #54
It's all unacceptable. XRubicon Dec 2017 #11
I'm not sure I agree. rainin Dec 2017 #18
So, eight women linked with Roger Stone rat fucking, all make the same ridiculous accusations dhol82 Dec 2017 #23
The accusation leveled against Franken were ridiculous. He was set up. rainin Dec 2017 #56
Hope you are not getting that horrible cold that is going around. Feel better soon. dhol82 Dec 2017 #59
Question? world wide wally Dec 2017 #19
When does the line counteract LakeArenal Dec 2017 #40
We need the distinctions rock Dec 2017 #43
"women reporting" Jakes Progress Dec 2017 #65
Its because corporate owned Media rainy Dec 2017 #70
This is the purist, silly political mistake being made -- being suckered by false equivalency. ancianita Dec 2017 #13
The Republicans have already weaponized #metoo SergeStorms Dec 2017 #15
First they emphasized whites/blacks distrust, then Christian/Muslim distrust, now Binkie The Clown Dec 2017 #16
Though it looks that way right now, I'm going to follow Franken's lead about what the party ancianita Dec 2017 #17
If Democrats don't change very soon..... SergeStorms Dec 2017 #21
Democrats are the minority party right now, but believe this: there is always a long term. ancianita Dec 2017 #34
Aren't they? SergeStorms Dec 2017 #20
Yes. cwydro Dec 2017 #66
Who does your title refer to? Didnt think Moore went that far? Amaryllis Dec 2017 #22
Hypothetical generalities, not specific cases. nt Binkie The Clown Dec 2017 #24
Got it. If the hypothetical fits, wear it? Amaryllis Dec 2017 #25
Look up the Rape allegations made against tRump robbob Dec 2017 #72
You're right; I remember that now. I think she was working with Gloria Allred and was Amaryllis Dec 2017 #78
No thats the one. robbob Dec 2017 #79
What does it say when there are so many it's hard to keep them all straight? THat alone Amaryllis Dec 2017 #80
Taking it too far imo... SummerSnow Dec 2017 #26
My chiropractor's office receptionist calls lots of people "Sweetie." i always found it Amaryllis Dec 2017 #28
I have heard the expression from many southerners and it was just a friendly greeting imo SummerSnow Dec 2017 #30
My Wife Says It All The Time ProfessorGAC Dec 2017 #60
It makes me deeply uncomfortable. Saviolo Dec 2017 #64
Around here treestar Dec 2017 #49
If these events were reported at the time, there could be more mythology Dec 2017 #27
Ivanka claimed T raped her? I never heard that one? Amaryllis Dec 2017 #29
yes, it is in her book SummerSnow Dec 2017 #31
Which book ? She's written several. She actually said he raped her??? Amaryllis Dec 2017 #33
Ya. I remember she said in a interview that he was angry and he raped her. SummerSnow Dec 2017 #35
This message was self-deleted by its author Amaryllis Dec 2017 #38
Not Ivanka. His first wife, Ivana. LisaL Dec 2017 #37
THanks! I mis-read Ivana to be Ivanka and that kinda freaked me out. But it didnt seem Amaryllis Dec 2017 #41
It was his first wife Ivana, not his daughter SummerSnow Dec 2017 #39
nothing in the spear of public knowledge tells us 'franken can't keep his hands to himself" questionseverything Dec 2017 #32
Woefully Inadequate? ProfessorGAC Dec 2017 #61
grabbing the flesh of someone's waist is worse than all of that IronLionZion Dec 2017 #36
Some folks have become way to strident in support of their cause IMHO. jalan48 Dec 2017 #50
I don't think it was about the "Me Too" movement. That was just an excuse. Kablooie Dec 2017 #52
If the so called perp is Jewish or Black it is Big News. If he is a white GOPer McCamy Taylor Dec 2017 #58
exactly n/t orleans Dec 2017 #62
K&R. dchill Dec 2017 #67
The Age of False Equivalencies. BlancheSplanchnik Dec 2017 #68
Talk about not understanding the world we live in. KitSileya Dec 2017 #69
+1000 brer cat Dec 2017 #74
EXACTLY right, Kit NastyRiffraff Dec 2017 #75
This! mcar Dec 2017 #76
Its good to hear a response like this LiberalLovinLug Dec 2017 #77
You're not gonna win this one. PatrickforO Dec 2017 #71
One dude to another, do you really feel you have the standing to diminsh any woman's ... marble falls Dec 2017 #73
People who rape should be in prison gollygee Dec 2017 #81
so now anybody who isn't a rapist/murderer is fit to be a dem senator/POTUS? that doesn't sound TheFrenchRazor Dec 2017 #82
Latest Discussions»General Discussion»When "He abducted her, ti...»Reply #77